Forum: The Pump House Saloon
01-31-2013, 02:22 PM
|
|
Replies: 1
Views: 488
Chicken farmer
Chicken farmer
A chicken farmer went to a local bar, sat next to a woman and ordered a glass of champagne.
The woman perked up and said, ...'How about that?... I just ordered a glass of...
|
|
Forum: The Pump House Saloon
01-26-2013, 11:51 AM
|
|
Replies: 1
Views: 355
Golf Balls
A man entered the bus with both of his front pants pockets full ofgolf balls, and sat down next to a beautiful (you guessed it) blonde.
The puzzled blonde kept looking at him and his bulging...
|
|
Forum: The Pump House Saloon
01-18-2013, 10:32 AM
|
|
Replies: 0
Views: 312
Sven and Ole
Sven and Ole, Two Minnesota engineers were standing at the base of a flagpole, looking up. A woman walks by asks what they were doing.
"Ve're supposed to find da height of dis flagpole, " said...
|
|
Forum: The Pump House Saloon
01-02-2013, 04:40 PM
|
|
Replies: 1
Views: 316
"New Titles"
"New Titles"
It was fun being a baby boomer ... until now.
Some of the artists of the '60s are revising their
hits with new lyrics to accommodate baby
boomers. They include:
1. Herman's...
|
|
Forum: The Pump House Saloon
12-14-2012, 10:21 AM
|
|
Replies: 4
Views: 570
Sex at 70
I just took a leaflet out of my mailbox, informing me that I can
have sex at 70.
I'm so happy, because I live at number 72. So it's not too far to
walk home afterwards. And I don't...
|
|
Forum: The Pump House Saloon
11-21-2012, 02:49 PM
|
|
Replies: 6
Views: 520
New career
A gynecologist had become fed up with malpractice insurance and HMO
paperwork, and was burned out.
Hoping to try another career where skillful hands would be beneficial; he
decided to become a...
|
|
Forum: The Pump House Saloon
11-10-2012, 10:57 AM
|
|
Replies: 4
Views: 524
The Black Bra
*The Black Bra (as told by a woman)*
I had lunch with 2 of my unmarried friends. One is engaged,
one is a mistress, and I have been married for 20+ years. We
were...
|
|
Forum: The Pump House Saloon
11-09-2012, 03:22 PM
|
|
Replies: 2
Views: 406
God's Joke
A Reading from Genesis
And God promised men that good and obedient wives would be found
in all corners of the earth.
Then he made the earth round...... And he laughed and laughed and...
|
|
Forum: The Pump House Saloon
11-04-2012, 10:57 AM
|
|
Replies: 3
Views: 447
password security
password security
During a recent password audit by a company, it was found that an employee
was using the following password:
"MickeyMinniePlutoHueyLouieDeweyDonaldGoofySacramento"
...
|
|
Forum: The Pump House Saloon
10-06-2012, 10:20 AM
|
|
Replies: 2
Views: 423
Rats - A very timely story...
Rats - A very timely story...
A Tourist walked into a Chinese curio shop in San Francisco . While
looking around at the exotic merchandise, he noticed a very lifelike,
life-sized, bronze...
|
|
Forum: The Pump House Saloon
09-14-2012, 02:44 PM
|
|
Replies: 0
Views: 379
Two boys, the cop, and the dog cart
Two boys, the cop, and the dog cart
Two young boys are sitting in a wooden cart that they have harnessed to a very large dog.
A passing policeman stops and says to them. "You can't hitch a...
|
|
Forum: The Pump House Saloon
09-02-2012, 11:50 AM
|
|
Replies: 3
Views: 314
Last Request
In Washington, D.C., an old priest lay dying in the hospital. For years he had faithfully served the people of the nation's capital and was well known among the elected officials. He motioned for...
|
|
Forum: The Pump House Saloon
09-01-2012, 07:59 AM
|
|
Replies: 5
Views: 523
The Perfect Husband
Several men are in the locker room of a golf club. A cellular phone on a
bench rings and a man engages the hands-free speaker function and begins
to talk. Everyone else in the room stops to listen....
|
|
Forum: The Pump House Saloon
08-11-2012, 09:01 AM
|
|
Replies: 3
Views: 533
New Experience
I would like to share an experience with you about drinking and driving.
As you well know, some of us have been known to have had brushes with the authorities on our way home from the odd social...
|
|
Forum: The Pump House Saloon
08-04-2012, 10:21 AM
|
|
Replies: 2
Views: 406
Morning Sex
She was standing in the kitchen, preparing our usual
Soft-boiled eggs and toast for breakfast,
Wearing only The 'T' shirt that she normally slept in.
...
As I walked in, almost awake, she turned...
|
|
Forum: The Pump House Saloon
07-29-2012, 11:27 AM
|
|
Replies: 6
Views: 705
Obama's angry with Texas
Says he'll never come back here and will do all he can to convince us to secede! Here's why....THEY SAY THIS HAPPENED IN San
Antonio!!!
He claims every time he gets up on stage to make a speech,...
|
|
Forum: The Pump House Saloon
07-14-2012, 06:24 AM
|
|
Replies: 2
Views: 408
BEER AND SWEET TEA
BEER AND SWEET TEA
A woman goes to the doctor all black and blue.
Doctor: "What happened?"
Woman: "Doctor, I don't know what to do. Every time my husband
comes home drunk on Bud...
|
|
Forum: The Pump House Saloon
07-11-2012, 12:59 PM
|
|
Replies: 6
Views: 515
A Farmer's Logic
You know there are so many TV channels, each one starved for new programs. In a rural program for farmers, a female TV reporter seeking the main cause of Mad Cow disease, arranged for an interview...
|
|
Forum: The Pump House Saloon
06-06-2012, 08:08 AM
|
|
Replies: 8
Views: 746
Dating in 1960
Dating in 1960
You need to be able to remember the era to really enjoy this...
It was a hot Saturday evening in the summer of 1960 and Fred had a date
with Peggy Sue. He arrived at her house...
|
|
Forum: The Pump House Saloon
06-04-2012, 12:16 PM
|
|
Replies: 2
Views: 502
|
|
Forum: The Pump House Saloon
06-02-2012, 02:54 PM
|
|
Replies: 0
Views: 1,140
Wife vs Maid
A man was prescribed Viagra by his doctor who told him to take it one hour before sex.
The man collected his prescription and went home to wait for his wife to get back from work.
An hour...
|
|
Forum: The Pump House Saloon
05-29-2012, 12:20 PM
|
|
Replies: 1
Views: 505
Outta the mouths of babes
Stories about children and their views of the world are always touching.
A father watched his young daughter playing in the garden.
He smiled as he reflected on how sweet and pure his...
|
|
Forum: The Pump House Saloon
05-28-2012, 05:42 PM
|
|
Replies: 2
Views: 492
Another Little Johnny Joke
A teacher asked her 6th grade class how many of them were Obama fans.
Not really knowing what an Obama fan is, but wanting to be liked by the
teacher, all the kids raised their hands except for...
|
|
Forum: The Pump House Saloon
05-28-2012, 05:37 PM
|
|
Replies: 1
Views: 491
2012 Social Security Stimulus Package
.
Just wanted to let you know - today I received my 2012 Social Security Stimulus Package. It contained two tomato seeds, cornbread mix, a prayer rug, a machine to blow...
|
|
Forum: The Pump House Saloon
04-24-2012, 10:46 AM
|
|
Replies: 0
Views: 474
Four worms in a church
A Minister decided that a visual demonstration would add emphasis to his Sunday sermon, so he took four worms and placed them into four separate jars.
The first worm was put into a container of...
|
|
Forum: The Pump House Saloon
04-22-2012, 09:59 AM
|
|
Replies: 8
Views: 817
The Electric Fence
If you have ever used an electric fence or know someone who has one you should read this.
The language used is a bit salty, but 'he tells it like it is' without cursing.
If you don't laugh...
|
|
Forum: The Pump House Saloon
04-21-2012, 03:08 PM
|
|
Replies: 3
Views: 429
BREAKING NEWS
Just got this from a reliable source!!!
It has been leaked to the Press, that Barack Obama has chosen Sylvester Stallone for his 2012 running mate and Nancy Pelosi for Secretary of State.
...
|
|
Forum: The Pump House Saloon
04-17-2012, 12:08 PM
|
|
Replies: 2
Views: 527
This Morning
The strangest thing happened to me today -
I had to run to the grocery store. As I approached the entrance, I noticed a driver looking for A parking space. I flagged the driver and pointed out a...
|
|
Forum: The Pump House Saloon
04-11-2012, 08:06 AM
|
|
Replies: 4
Views: 801
Sad but True
Sad but True
A group of 15-year-old girlfriends discussed where to meet for dinner. Finally, they agreed to meet at the Dairy Queen next to the Ocean View restaurant, because they had only...
|
|
Forum: The Pump House Saloon
04-05-2012, 02:30 PM
|
|
Replies: 6
Views: 636
Craigslist Ad
Fifty-year old manure spreader. Not sure of brand. Said to have been produced in Kenya. Used for a few years in Indonesia before being smuggled into the US via Hawaii. Of questionable pedigree. Does...
|
|
Forum: General Discussion
04-05-2012, 01:06 PM
|
|
Replies: 105
Views: 2,686
|
|
Forum: General Discussion
04-05-2012, 01:03 PM
|
|
Replies: 84
Views: 2,098
|
|
Forum: General Discussion
04-05-2012, 01:01 PM
|
|
Replies: 60
Views: 1,530
|
|
Forum: General Discussion
04-05-2012, 12:55 PM
|
|
Replies: 120
Views: 2,611
|
|
Forum: General Discussion
04-05-2012, 12:53 PM
|
|
Replies: 84
Views: 1,778
|
|
Forum: General Discussion
04-05-2012, 12:50 PM
|
|
Replies: 89
Views: 1,882
|
|
Forum: The Pump House Saloon
04-05-2012, 12:20 PM
|
|
Replies: 1
Views: 686
Best bar joke of the year
Best bar joke of the year ...........
A black guy, an illegal alien, a Muslim, and a communist walk into a bar.
The bartender asks....................."What can I get you , Mr. President ?
"
|
|
Forum: The Pump House Saloon
03-07-2012, 11:01 AM
|
|
Replies: 0
Views: 436
FOX NEWS BOWS DOWN
FOX NEWS BOWS DOWN TO THE PRESSURE
Fox is already cowering down to the President.
In response to President Obama's complaint that FOX News doesn't show
enough black and Hispanic...
|
|
Forum: The Pump House Saloon
02-23-2012, 11:46 AM
|
|
Replies: 0
Views: 453
"Allergy"
"Allergy"
Because of an ear infection, Little Johnny, had
to go to the pediatrician. The doctor directed his
comments and questions to Little Johnny in a
professional manner. When he asked...
|
|
Forum: The Pump House Saloon
02-20-2012, 09:07 AM
|
|
Replies: 20
Views: 1,105
Re: Drug Problems When We Were Young
Yeah I got drug around a lot too. Looking back, I'm glad I did.
I agree, all this crap started when the hippies came into bloom back in the 60's. Should have shot all of them, but it's too late...
|
|
Forum: The Pump House Saloon
02-14-2012, 11:06 AM
|
|
Replies: 0
Views: 363
Father Of The Year
Father Of The Year
A man boarded a plane with six kids.
After they got settled in their seats
a woman sitting across the aisle from him leaned over to him and asked,
"Are all of...
|
|
Forum: The Pump House Saloon
02-12-2012, 02:40 PM
|
|
Replies: 8
Views: 1,299
Joke of the day
My wife told me to go to the doctor and get some of those tablets that 'help' get an erection.
You should have seen her face when I came back and tossed her some diet pills!
I'm still...
|
|
Forum: The Pump House Saloon
02-11-2012, 07:04 AM
|
|
Replies: 1
A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H, I, J, K
Views: 351
A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H, I, J, K
A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H, I, J, K
After being married for thirty years, a wife asked her husband
to describe her.
He looked at her for a while...then said, "You're A, B,...
|
|
Forum: The Pump House Saloon
02-10-2012, 08:51 AM
|
|
Replies: 2
Views: 450
Monastery Life
A young monk arrives at the monastery. He is assigned to helping the other
monks in copying the old canons and laws of the church by hand.
He notices, however, that all of the monks are copying...
|
|
Forum: General Discussion
02-10-2012, 08:43 AM
|
|
Replies: 79
Views: 1,383
|
|
Forum: General Discussion
02-10-2012, 08:40 AM
|
|
Replies: 55
Views: 1,000
|
|
Forum: General Discussion
02-10-2012, 08:38 AM
|
|
Replies: 62
Views: 1,154
|
|
Forum: General Discussion
02-10-2012, 08:36 AM
|
|
Replies: 82
Views: 1,427
|
|
Forum: General Discussion
02-10-2012, 08:35 AM
|
|
Replies: 63
Views: 1,245
|
|
Forum: General Discussion
02-10-2012, 08:33 AM
|
|
Replies: 109
Views: 1,719
|
