Ladies, forgive me. - The Firearms Forum

bunnyhunter12 · 06-04-2007, 09:13 PM

Bank of Newfie Scotia ATM Instructions

[Please note that the Bank of Newfie Scotia is installing new "Drive-through" teller machines. Customers will be able to withdraw cash without leaving their vehicles. To enable customers to use this new facility, the following procedures have been drawn up. Please read the procedure that applies to your own circumstances (i.e. MALE or FEMALE) and remember them when you use the machine for the first time…]

MALE PROCEDURE
1. Drive up to the cash machine;
2. Put down your car window;
3. Insert card into machine and enter PIN;
4. Enter amount of cash required and withdraw;
5. Retrieve card, cash and receipt;
6. Put window up;
7. Drive off.

FEMALE PROCEDURE
1. Drive up to cash machine;
2. Reverse back the required amount to align car window to machine;
3. Set parking brake;
4. Put the window down;
5. Find handbag, remove all contents onto passenger seat to locate card;
6. Turn the radio down;
7. Attempt to insert card into machine;
8. Open car door to allow easier access to machine due to its excessive distance from the car;
9. Insert card;
10. Re-insert card the right way up;
11. Dig through handbag to find diary with your PIN written on the inside back page;
12. Enter PIN;
13. Press cancel and re-enter correct PIN;
14. Enter amount of cash required;
15. Check make up in rear view mirror;
16. Retrieve cash and receipt;
17. Empty handbag again to locate wallet and place cash inside;
18. Place receipt in back of checkbook;
19. Re-check make-up again;
20. Drive forwards 2 feet;
21. Reverse back to cash machine;
22. Retrieve card;
23. Re-empty hand bag, locate card holder, and place card into the slot provided;
24. Give appropriate one-fingered hand signal to irate male drivers in line behind you;
25. Restart stalled engine and pull off;
26. Drive for 2 to 3 miles;
27. Release Parking Brake.

Bruce FLinch · 06-04-2007, 11:09 PM

Those Instructions work in the US, too !

AL MOUNT · 06-05-2007, 05:42 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bunnyhunter12

8. Open car door to allow easier access to machine due to its excessive distance from the car;

This one hits home.....I see it all the time and just sit there & snicker.

Same phenomenon.....

....... happens at fast food drive up windows......

I drive a full size Ford pickup and get within inches of the eqpt.

Must be a guy thing.......ya think.....

Oops...looks like the MCP...

... in me is floating to the surface....

.

MCP = Male Chaunivist Pig

06-04-2007, 09:13 PM	#1
bunnyhunter12 Advanced Senior Member Join Date: May 2007 Location: Newfoundland, Canada Posts: 1,090	Ladies, forgive me. Bank of Newfie Scotia ATM Instructions [Please note that the Bank of Newfie Scotia is installing new "Drive-through" teller machines. Customers will be able to withdraw cash without leaving their vehicles. To enable customers to use this new facility, the following procedures have been drawn up. Please read the procedure that applies to your own circumstances (i.e. MALE or FEMALE) and remember them when you use the machine for the first time…] MALE PROCEDURE 1. Drive up to the cash machine; 2. Put down your car window; 3. Insert card into machine and enter PIN; 4. Enter amount of cash required and withdraw; 5. Retrieve card, cash and receipt; 6. Put window up; 7. Drive off. FEMALE PROCEDURE 1. Drive up to cash machine; 2. Reverse back the required amount to align car window to machine; 3. Set parking brake; 4. Put the window down; 5. Find handbag, remove all contents onto passenger seat to locate card; 6. Turn the radio down; 7. Attempt to insert card into machine; 8. Open car door to allow easier access to machine due to its excessive distance from the car; 9. Insert card; 10. Re-insert card the right way up; 11. Dig through handbag to find diary with your PIN written on the inside back page; 12. Enter PIN; 13. Press cancel and re-enter correct PIN; 14. Enter amount of cash required; 15. Check make up in rear view mirror; 16. Retrieve cash and receipt; 17. Empty handbag again to locate wallet and place cash inside; 18. Place receipt in back of checkbook; 19. Re-check make-up again; 20. Drive forwards 2 feet; 21. Reverse back to cash machine; 22. Retrieve card; 23. Re-empty hand bag, locate card holder, and place card into the slot provided; 24. Give appropriate one-fingered hand signal to irate male drivers in line behind you; 25. Restart stalled engine and pull off; 26. Drive for 2 to 3 miles; 27. Release Parking Brake. __________________ Quaerite Prime Regnum Dei~ Official motto of Newfoundland If guns are outlawed, only the government will have guns. Only the police, the secret police, the military, the hired servants of our rulers. Only the government --and a few outlaws. I intend to be among the outlaws. -- Edward Abbey in Abbey's Road, p.39 (Plume, 1979) -Smitty -->

06-04-2007, 11:09 PM	#2
Bruce FLinch Advanced Senior Member Join Date: Aug 2005 Location: Bay Point, Kali..aka Gun Point Posts: 5,016	Re: Ladies, forgive me. Those Instructions work in the US, too ! __________________ A bad day @ the Range, is better than a good day @ work.