Speaking German in Texas
Near Fredericksburg , Texas , where there is a large German-speaking population, a farmer walking down a country road notices a man drinking from his pond with his hand. The farmer shouted: "Trink das wasser nicht. Die kuhen haben dahin gesheissen." Which means: (Don't drink the water, the cows have sh-- in it.) The man shouted back: "I'm from New York and just down here campaigning for Obama's health care plan, I can't understand you. Please speak English." The farmer replied: "Use two hands, you'll get more."
"A strong body makes the mind strong. As to the species of exercises, I advise the gun. While this gives moderate exercise to the body, it gives boldness, enterprise and independence to the mind. Games played with the ball, and others of that nature, are too violent for the body and stamp no character on the mind. Let your gun therefore be your constant companion of your walks." --Thomas Jefferson, letter to Peter Carr, 1785