PROOF: You Can't Fix Stupid - The Firearms Forum

AL MOUNT · 10-29-2011, 11:18 AM

Couple Lost in Apple Orchard Calls 911

http://abcnews.go.com/blogs/headline...ard-calls-911/

geds · 10-29-2011, 11:23 AM

Will Rodgers used to say "You can't legislate against stupidity."

Alpo · 10-29-2011, 11:35 AM

I'll admit, this one sounds funny, but tell me. What would you do?

You are out in a fair-size hunk of unfamiliar woods (from their website - "Honey Pot Hill Orchards, is a 200-acre family owned and operated farm since 1923"). It's night. It's Massachusetts in October, which means it's probably around freezing. You don't have tents or sleeping bags or anything for surviving a night in the woods. If you notice the picture, it appears to be on the top of a hill, and if you go the wrong way while attempting to find your way out of the orchard you find yourself in "real" woods.

So, you whip out your cell and call the farm, to say, "Hey, I've gotten myself lost out here, can you come get me?", but the farm don't answer.

What would you do?

Diamondback · 10-29-2011, 12:28 PM

This is what happens when over educated city people are allowed out of their natural environment. They should not be allowed out of their cages without a professional guide.

carver · 10-29-2011, 12:52 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Alpo

I'll admit, this one sounds funny, but tell me. What would you do?

You are out in a fair-size hunk of unfamiliar woods (from their website - "Honey Pot Hill Orchards, is a 200-acre family owned and operated farm since 1923"). It's night. It's Massachusetts in October, which means it's probably around freezing. You don't have tents or sleeping bags or anything for surviving a night in the woods. If you notice the picture, it appears to be on the top of a hill, and if you go the wrong way while attempting to find your way out of the orchard you find yourself in "real" woods.

So, you whip out your cell and call the farm, to say, "Hey, I've gotten myself lost out here, can you come get me?", but the farm don't answer.

What would you do?

If I wasn't any smarter than these two, I would have got my apples at the store. A small one!

AL MOUNT · 10-29-2011, 12:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Alpo

I'll admit, this one sounds funny, but tell me. What would you do?
What would you do?

Sit down and build a small fire, roast some apples,
and wait a few minutes until some nosy Liberal reported
an illegal burn polluting the air

then ride back to my car on the Fire Truck..

herohog · 10-29-2011, 02:18 PM

Put your hand on a wall. LEAVE IT THERE and walk. It will eventually lead you out! It may not be the most efficient way but it WILL work!

Alpo · 10-29-2011, 02:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by herohog

Put your hand on a wall. LEAVE IT THERE and walk. It will eventually lead you out! It may not be the most efficient way but it WILL work!

That would work in the maze. That's actually how to get through a maze. But this was an apple orchard. No walls.

herohog · 10-29-2011, 05:08 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Alpo

That would work in the maze. That's actually how to get through a maze. But this was an apple orchard. No walls.

Doh! That's what I get for half-assed reading while thinking of another news story involving a maze!

geds · 10-29-2011, 05:27 PM

The lost guy was a meteorologist too! You'd think he would be able to determine direction and follow at least a general bearing back to a road or the farm house!

Alpo · 10-29-2011, 06:31 PM

I discovered this back when I was a Boy Scout. Knowing which was is east does not help if you don't know which way the road/farmhouse/car is.

hunter29180 · 10-29-2011, 06:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AL MOUNT

Sit down and build a small fire, roast some apples,
and wait a few minutes until some nosy Liberal reported
an illegal burn polluting the air

then ride back to my car on the Fire Truck..

perfect!!

Quote:

Originally Posted by herohog

Doh! That's what I get for half-assed reading while thinking of another news story involving a maze!

Ahhhh..you wouldnt be related to these folks would you????

geds · 10-29-2011, 11:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Alpo

I discovered this back when I was a Boy Scout. Knowing which was is east does not help if you don't know which way the road/farmhouse/car is.

Yes - situational awareness does factor in when going somewhere! But only if you want to go someplace in particular or want to get back!

Warith · 10-29-2011, 11:35 PM

I guess none of you guys have ever been in an apple orchard. The plant the trees in rows. Just follow a row till you get to the fence or the farm house and your home free.

coreyacp · 10-29-2011, 11:49 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Warith

I guess none of you guys have ever been in an apple orchard. The plant the trees in rows. Just follow a row till you get to the fence or the farm house and your home free.

LOLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLL!

cycloneman · 10-29-2011, 11:55 PM

Do a search for lost people in corn field maze. You will be suprised how many times this happens. I went to SW TX just 2 weeks ago and past a corn field where this happened and the family had to call 911.

You know its tricky when your in a maze cause every time you turn the sun is in a different place.

Reset button press the reset button

Country101 · 11-01-2011, 09:22 AM

yeah cyclone, but the rows are all pointed in one direction!

carver · 11-01-2011, 09:40 AM

Most orchards are layed out like the pic below. You can navigate to any direction you choose just by following the trees. Follow the row in, follow the row out! That's not really that complicated!

Buckshot · 11-07-2011, 01:50 AM

The 911 center in Tucson took a cell phone call from a guy who said he was lost "in the woods." Now, "woods" is a regional term that is not used around here. The closest thing we have is coniferous forest on some of the mountain tops. But the distinction was lost on the dispatcher. Too bad. After about ten minutes of trying to agree on some common landmark or starting point, the dispatcher was reduced to asking what TOWN the guy had started out from. Pretty quickly it was determined that he was indeed lost "in the woods." The woods of Virginia. Authorities in that area were contacted and put in touch with the guy. Now of course the cell phone companies will tell you there's no way that could have happened. Yeah, right. They're the same folks who tell you their system never "drops" calls either.

10-29-2011, 11:18 AM	#1
AL MOUNT Advanced Senior Member Join Date: Oct 2006 Location: Cleaning my Thompson in The Foothills of the Ozark Mountains Posts: 3,108	PROOF: You Can't Fix Stupid Couple Lost in Apple Orchard Calls 911 http://abcnews.go.com/blogs/headline...ard-calls-911/ __________________ 501st Parachute Infantry Regiment 101st Airborne Division Vietnam 67-68 -->

10-29-2011, 11:23 AM	#2
geds Advanced Senior Member Join Date: Mar 2011 Posts: 3,706	Re: PROOF: You Can't Fix Stupid Will Rodgers used to say "You can't legislate against stupidity."

10-29-2011, 11:35 AM	#3
Alpo Advanced Senior Member Join Date: Feb 2007 Location: NW Florida Posts: 8,662	Re: PROOF: You Can't Fix Stupid I'll admit, this one sounds funny, but tell me. What would you do? You are out in a fair-size hunk of unfamiliar woods (from their website - "Honey Pot Hill Orchards, is a 200-acre family owned and operated farm since 1923"). It's night. It's Massachusetts in October, which means it's probably around freezing. You don't have tents or sleeping bags or anything for surviving a night in the woods. If you notice the picture, it appears to be on the top of a hill, and if you go the wrong way while attempting to find your way out of the orchard you find yourself in "real" woods. So, you whip out your cell and call the farm, to say, "Hey, I've gotten myself lost out here, can you come get me?", but the farm don't answer. What would you do? __________________ Meddle not in the affairs of dragons, for thou art crunchy, and taste good with catsup - George of Lod, Year of Our Lord 297 I always take precautions. Beware the Evil Bullet Fairies.

10-29-2011, 12:28 PM	#4
Diamondback Senior Member Join Date: Sep 2009 Location: Silver City, Oklahoma Posts: 663	Re: PROOF: You Can't Fix Stupid This is what happens when over educated city people are allowed out of their natural environment. They should not be allowed out of their cages without a professional guide.

10-29-2011, 02:18 PM	#7
herohog V.I.P. Member Join Date: Sep 2011 Location: Shreveport, LA Posts: 453	Re: PROOF: You Can't Fix Stupid Put your hand on a wall. LEAVE IT THERE and walk. It will eventually lead you out! It may not be the most efficient way but it WILL work! __________________ Speedy: Pres, NW Chapter, League VP of Louisiana Open Carry Awareness League AKA: Hero Hog, Dr. Speed, "The Brass Mangler" and "That fat, old, balding, Grey-bearded gimpy guy" NRA, LSA, USN-DAV *Winning and getting the prize aren't the same it would appear... TWICE!*

10-29-2011, 05:27 PM	#10
geds Advanced Senior Member Join Date: Mar 2011 Posts: 3,706	Re: PROOF: You Can't Fix Stupid The lost guy was a meteorologist too! You'd think he would be able to determine direction and follow at least a general bearing back to a road or the farm house!

10-29-2011, 06:31 PM	#11
Alpo Advanced Senior Member Join Date: Feb 2007 Location: NW Florida Posts: 8,662	Re: PROOF: You Can't Fix Stupid I discovered this back when I was a Boy Scout. Knowing which was is east does not help if you don't know which way the road/farmhouse/car is. __________________ Meddle not in the affairs of dragons, for thou art crunchy, and taste good with catsup - George of Lod, Year of Our Lord 297 I always take precautions. Beware the Evil Bullet Fairies.

10-29-2011, 11:35 PM	#14
Warith V.I.P. Member Join Date: Oct 2010 Location: Belton, Mo Posts: 287	Re: PROOF: You Can't Fix Stupid I guess none of you guys have ever been in an apple orchard. The plant the trees in rows. Just follow a row till you get to the fence or the farm house and your home free.

10-29-2011, 11:55 PM	#16
cycloneman Advanced Senior Member Join Date: Dec 2008 Location: Louisiana Posts: 7,406	Re: PROOF: You Can't Fix Stupid Do a search for lost people in corn field maze. You will be suprised how many times this happens. I went to SW TX just 2 weeks ago and past a corn field where this happened and the family had to call 911. You know its tricky when your in a maze cause every time you turn the sun is in a different place. Reset button press the reset button __________________ Who are you going to serve today?

11-01-2011, 09:22 AM	#17
Country101 Advanced Senior Member Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: Dardanelle, AR Contributor Posts: 2,029	Re: PROOF: You Can't Fix Stupid yeah cyclone, but the rows are all pointed in one direction! __________________ Gainfully employed= shooting somebody elses bullets and getting paid for it Country101

11-01-2011, 09:40 AM	#18
carver TFF Moderator/Host Join Date: Jul 2008 Location: DAV, Deep in the Pineywoods of East Texas, just west of Shreveport, LA Contributor Posts: 11,288	Re: PROOF: You Can't Fix Stupid Most orchards are layed out like the pic below. You can navigate to any direction you choose just by following the trees. Follow the row in, follow the row out! That's not really that complicated! Attached Images __________________ Y'all be safe now, ya hear! Lamentations Chapter 5: 1. Remember, O LORD, what is come upon us: consider, and behold our reproach. 2. Our inheritance is turned to strangers, our houses to aliens. 3. We are orphans and fatherless, our mothers [are] as widows. 5. Our necks [are] under persecution: we labour, [and] have no rest. 16. The crown is fallen [from] our head: woe unto us, that we have sinned! 21. Turn thou us unto thee, O LORD, and we shall be turned; renew our days as of old.

11-07-2011, 01:50 AM	#19
Buckshot Senior Member Join Date: May 2009 Location: Southern AZ Posts: 884	Re: PROOF: You Can't Fix Stupid The 911 center in Tucson took a cell phone call from a guy who said he was lost "in the woods." Now, "woods" is a regional term that is not used around here. The closest thing we have is coniferous forest on some of the mountain tops. But the distinction was lost on the dispatcher. Too bad. After about ten minutes of trying to agree on some common landmark or starting point, the dispatcher was reduced to asking what TOWN the guy had started out from. Pretty quickly it was determined that he was indeed lost "in the woods." The woods of Virginia. Authorities in that area were contacted and put in touch with the guy. Now of course the cell phone companies will tell you there's no way that could have happened. Yeah, right. They're the same folks who tell you their system never "drops" calls either. __________________ United States of America - Born July 4th, 1776 - Killed by 50 million brain-dead zombies November 6th, 2012 Mack: Shame what this town's come to. Charley Waite: You could do something about it. Mack: What? We're freighters. Ralph here's a shopkeeper. Charley Waite: You're men, ain't you? Mack: I didn't raise my boys just to see 'em killed. Charley Waite: Well you may not know this, but there's things that gnaw at a man worse than dying. - Open Range MOLON LABE