Advanced Senior Member
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: Bay Point, Kali..aka Gun Point
The kind of immigrants we need
Pedro Montoya came to the USA in March 2006.
His parents were very concerned about his entry into
public school in Texas and tutored him extensively in
English, Math, Science, and the History of the United States
before immigrating. Pedro did very well on written tests, so
the teacher thought she would give the other kids a chance
to catch up by giving an oral pop-quiz.
The results were not exactly what she expected.
"Who said: Give me Liberty, or give me Death?"
The teacher saw a sea of blank faces, except for Pedro, who had his hand up.
"Patrick Henry, 1775."
"Very good!" said the teacher. "Now, who said, "Government of the
people, by the people, for the people, shall not perish from the earth?"
Again, no response except from Pedro: "Abraham Lincoln, 1863."
The teacher snapped at the class, "Class, you should be ashamed!
Pedro, who is new to our country, knows more about its history than you do!"
She heard a loud whisper: "Screw the Mexicans!"
"Who said that?" she demanded.
Pedro put his hand up. "Jim Bowie, 1836."
At that point, a student in the back said, "I'm gonna puke."
The teacher glared and asked, "All right! Now, who said that?"
Again, Pedro answered, "George Bush to the Japanese Prime Minister, 1991."
Now furious, another student yelled, "Oh yeah? Suck this!"
Pedro jumped out of his chair waving his hand and shouting to the
teacher, "Bill Clinton to Monica Lewinsky, 1997!"
Now, with almost mob hysteria, the teacher said, "You little ****. If
you say anything else, I'll kill you!"
Pedro frantically yelled at the top of his voice, "Gary Condit to
Chandra Levy, 2001."
The teacher fainted, and as the class gathered around her on the floor,
someone said, "Oh sh!t, we're in BIG trouble now!"
Pedro whispered, "Saddam Hussein, 2003."
Finally someone throws an eraser at Pedro, someone shouted "Duck"!
Teacher, just waking, asked "Who said that?"
Pedro: Dick Cheney 2006!
A bad day @ the Range, is better than a good day @ work.