EVER NOTICED HOLIDAY SHOPPING? - The Firearms Forum

rooter · 11-17-2003, 05:28 AM

Interesting, beginning on a certain date, this time of the year, you know the holiday season I guess, the stores take on the appearance of a long haired lady riding with the top down on her convertible tooling along at 90 MPH!!! Even the grocery stores, opening for business at 6:00 in the morning, has the looks of a giant rummage sale. I mentioned to a friend yesterday that I had gone to the market early with intentions of purchasing the Thanksgiving turkey----grossly, I compared the scene to that friend that it appeared the store had been invaded by buzzards and a buzzard gang-bang had occurred right there amongst the frozen turkeys--- could it have been, after the store closed for the night and all, the buzzards swooped in for their idea of an orgy? I even pondered if there was a word in the Funk & Wagnall's for such buzzard fetishes---ever noticed that a buzzard looks like a turkey---most turkeys people see are those frozen versions--but next time you see a live turkey, strutting around like 'King of the Hill', note how extremely ugly they are---perhaps a buzzard is the only thing attracted to a turkey and vice-versa. Come partying time the frozen chickens kind'a keep to themselves--- probably disturbed by the goings-on over in the turkey freezer--the flapping of the buzzard wings and thei ugly chit-chat as they compare weights and genders!!! And truly, conditions do get worse, even at the big hoity-toity department stores---holiday shopping has a certain trend that the shelves and display counters get all askew---the hired help takes on the appearance and attitude of 'getting by--almost off the clock. I suppose one could even compare the scene to parents leaving for a weekend and the kids deciding to party in there absence----come late Sunday, when all the young party animals have departed, the kids of the house look around and decide what needs straightening before Mom and Dad drive up---straightening up my-------! Yup, notice the declining conditions of the store next time you go there---start this week at the turkey freezer and smile to yourself as you think about a buzzard/frozen turkey orgy. Will you attract attention you think---probably only if you giggle like a buzzard!!! Chief

Marlin · 11-17-2003, 07:30 AM

Delightful departure from the usual "MADHOUSE" description.

Thanks, Chief.

Hope 69/70 · 11-17-2003, 10:04 PM

LOL, LOL...."the stores take on the appearance of a long haired lady riding with the top down on her convertible tooling along at 90 MPH!" Couldn't have been described any better Chief.

Watch out Chief, one of those long haired ladies just grabbed the last of the sitcky buns..........LOL - Hope

tuckerd1 · 11-18-2003, 09:50 AM

HATE shopping!! BAH, HUMBUG!!!!

11-17-2003, 05:28 AM	#1
rooter VMBB Senior Chief Of Staff Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: Marty Robbins old hometown, Glendale Arizona--a suburb of Phoenix. Contributor Posts: 9,267	EVER NOTICED HOLIDAY SHOPPING? Interesting, beginning on a certain date, this time of the year, you know the holiday season I guess, the stores take on the appearance of a long haired lady riding with the top down on her convertible tooling along at 90 MPH!!! Even the grocery stores, opening for business at 6:00 in the morning, has the looks of a giant rummage sale. I mentioned to a friend yesterday that I had gone to the market early with intentions of purchasing the Thanksgiving turkey----grossly, I compared the scene to that friend that it appeared the store had been invaded by buzzards and a buzzard gang-bang had occurred right there amongst the frozen turkeys--- could it have been, after the store closed for the night and all, the buzzards swooped in for their idea of an orgy? I even pondered if there was a word in the Funk & Wagnall's for such buzzard fetishes---ever noticed that a buzzard looks like a turkey---most turkeys people see are those frozen versions--but next time you see a live turkey, strutting around like 'King of the Hill', note how extremely ugly they are---perhaps a buzzard is the only thing attracted to a turkey and vice-versa. Come partying time the frozen chickens kind'a keep to themselves--- probably disturbed by the goings-on over in the turkey freezer--the flapping of the buzzard wings and thei ugly chit-chat as they compare weights and genders!!! And truly, conditions do get worse, even at the big hoity-toity department stores---holiday shopping has a certain trend that the shelves and display counters get all askew---the hired help takes on the appearance and attitude of 'getting by--almost off the clock. I suppose one could even compare the scene to parents leaving for a weekend and the kids deciding to party in there absence----come late Sunday, when all the young party animals have departed, the kids of the house look around and decide what needs straightening before Mom and Dad drive up---straightening up my-------! Yup, notice the declining conditions of the store next time you go there---start this week at the turkey freezer and smile to yourself as you think about a buzzard/frozen turkey orgy. Will you attract attention you think---probably only if you giggle like a buzzard!!! Chief __________________ -->

11-17-2003, 07:30 AM	#2
Marlin TFF Admin Staff Chief Counselor Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: At SouthernMoss' side forever! Contributor Posts: 13,853	Delightful departure from the usual "MADHOUSE" description. Thanks, Chief. __________________ *The flag represents a living country and is itself considered a living thing.* *The only criminal class native to the United States is Congress.*

11-17-2003, 10:04 PM	#3
Hope 69/70 Advanced Senior Member Join Date: Jan 2001 Posts: 2,549	LOL, LOL...."the stores take on the appearance of a long haired lady riding with the top down on her convertible tooling along at 90 MPH!" Couldn't have been described any better Chief. Watch out Chief, one of those long haired ladies just grabbed the last of the sitcky buns..........LOL - Hope __________________ WAC - HQ. USARV / G1, Long Binh - Feb 69 - Feb 70

11-18-2003, 09:50 AM	#4
tuckerd1 Advanced Senior Member Join Date: Jun 2001 Location: Paint Rock Valley, Alabama Posts: 3,147	HATE shopping!! BAH, HUMBUG!!!!