3 of the USN's newest ships... - The Firearms Forum

jjmitchell60 · 01-20-2012, 09:31 PM

3 New Navy Ships:

USS REAGAN

Seeing it next to the Arizona Memorial really puts its size into perspective... ENORMOUS!

When the Bridge pipes 'Man the Rail' there is a lot of rail to man on this monster: shoulder to shoulder, around 4.5 acres. Her displacement is about 100,000 tons with full complement.

Capability

Top speed exceeds 30 knots, powered by two nuclear reactorsthat can operate for more than 20 years without refueling

1. Expected to operate in the fleet for about 50 years

2. Carries over 80 combat aircraft

3. Three arresting cables can stop a 28-ton aircraft going 150 miles per hour in less than 400 feet

Size

1. Towers 20 stories above the waterline

2. 1092 feet long; nearly as long as the Empire State Building is tall

3. Flight deck covers 4.5 acres

4. 4 bronze propellers, each 21 feet across, weighing 66,200 pounds

5. 2 rudders, each 29 by 22 feet and weighing 50 tons

6. 4 high speed aircraft elevators, each over 4,000 square feet

Capacity

1. Home to about 6,000 Navy personnel

2. Carries enough food and supplies to operate for 90 days

3. 18,150 meals served daily

4. Distillation plants provide 400,000 gallons of fresh water from sea water daily, enough for 2,000 homes

5. Nearly 30,000 light fixtures and 1,325 miles of cable and wiring 1,400 telephones

6. 14,000 pillowcases and 28,000 sheets

USS BILL CLINTON

The USS William Jefferson Clinton (CVS1) set sail today from its home port of Vancouver , BC

The ship is the first of its kind in the Navy and is a standing legacy to President Bill Clinton 'for his foresight in military budget cuts' and his conduct while holding the (formerly dignified) office of President.

The ship is constructed nearly entirely from recycled aluminum and is completely solar powered with a top speed of 5 knots. It boasts an arsenal comprised of one (unarmed) F14 Tomcat or one (unarmed) F18 Hornet aircraft which, although they cannot be launched on the 100 foot flight deck, form a very menacing presence.

As a standing order, there are no firearms allowed on board.

This crew, like the crew aboard the USS Jimmy Carter, is specially trained to avoid conflicts and appease any and all enemies of the United States at all costs.

An onboard Type One DNC Universal Translator can send out messages of apology in any language to anyone who may find America offensive. The number of apologies are limitless and though some may seem hollow and disingenuous, the Navy advises all apologies will sound very sincere.

In times of conflict, the USS Clinton has orders to seek refuge in Canada .

USS BARACK OBAMA

Details are vague.
But don't you worry..........he has a plan

geds · 01-20-2012, 10:33 PM

Classic!

rcairflr · 01-21-2012, 06:15 AM

Very good. No doubt that Obumer has a plan and I'm sure it comes with some "Hope and change".

howlnmad · 01-21-2012, 11:59 AM

Priceless

.

hkruss · 01-21-2012, 12:45 PM

.

U.S.S. obama

SSV-1
(Socialism Spreading Vehicle)

Nickname: " 'ol Jackass "

Cost: About six trillion so far

Service Life: Four years, hopefully

Propulsion System:
Multi-Fuel system, can run on money provided by Soros, Hollywood stars, Unions and misguided Liberal do-gooders. Can also be propelled literally by the stupidity and naivety of uninformed Americans.
Also runs partially upon narcissism and inflated sense of self importance.
Burns around $10,000 per second in Taxpayer funds.

Armament:
1 - Mk1 Mod1 'BRAY' Anti-Common Sense Device. The 'BRAY', (Bull Sh** Repeating, Always Yakkin') system, works by constantly spewing crap and false information in a constant loud and obnoxious tone, which, if repeated enough, will overcome the common sense of voters unequipped with an anti-B.S. counter-system.

1 - Cloaking Mechanism (also known as 'the media'). This system functions by conveniently suppressing potentially embarrassing info, such as ties to known terrorists, 20 year membership in the church of a vitriol spewing anti- American preacher, and admitted admiration and association with college Communist groups and Marxist professors.
This system has proven to be very effective. After all, how much do we REALLY know about the past of the ship's namesake?

2 - BIGASS ears. These detect any incoming threats and immediately dispatch nebbish Press Secretaries or Debbie Wasserman-Shultz to counter the threats.

1 - "B.O.W.", (bend over, welcome) System. This system allows the obama to bend at the waist to signify weakness or submission to foreign potentates or any other dignitaries deemed important enough to have their butt kissed.

Despite it's unassuming, goofy appearance, the U.S.S. obama possesses the power to bring down the most powerful Nation the World has ever seen by basically turning it into France. C'mon, you want to be like France, oui?

.

joncutt87 · 01-21-2012, 12:59 PM

gad1111 · 01-21-2012, 08:15 PM

Someone should Photoshop that pic so the ass is looking down his nose then it would be just like it's namesake

Greg

mjp28 · 01-22-2012, 05:05 PM

USS Reagan, what a ship! I've been to the Arizona Memorial, quite a stunning contrast.

Then I'm reading the USS WJC first thinking when did he......gotcha!

That was funny.

01-20-2012, 09:31 PM	#1
jjmitchell60 Advanced Senior Member Join Date: May 2004 Location: Raised in Buzzard Roost near Frog Town in hillls of Kentucky Contributor Posts: 1,471	3 of the USN's newest ships... 3 New Navy Ships: USS REAGAN Seeing it next to the Arizona Memorial really puts its size into perspective... ENORMOUS! When the Bridge pipes 'Man the Rail' there is a lot of rail to man on this monster: shoulder to shoulder, around 4.5 acres. Her displacement is about 100,000 tons with full complement. Capability Top speed exceeds 30 knots, powered by two nuclear reactorsthat can operate for more than 20 years without refueling 1. Expected to operate in the fleet for about 50 years 2. Carries over 80 combat aircraft 3. Three arresting cables can stop a 28-ton aircraft going 150 miles per hour in less than 400 feet Size 1. Towers 20 stories above the waterline 2. 1092 feet long; nearly as long as the Empire State Building is tall 3. Flight deck covers 4.5 acres 4. 4 bronze propellers, each 21 feet across, weighing 66,200 pounds 5. 2 rudders, each 29 by 22 feet and weighing 50 tons 6. 4 high speed aircraft elevators, each over 4,000 square feet Capacity 1. Home to about 6,000 Navy personnel 2. Carries enough food and supplies to operate for 90 days 3. 18,150 meals served daily 4. Distillation plants provide 400,000 gallons of fresh water from sea water daily, enough for 2,000 homes 5. Nearly 30,000 light fixtures and 1,325 miles of cable and wiring 1,400 telephones 6. 14,000 pillowcases and 28,000 sheets USS BILL CLINTON The USS William Jefferson Clinton (CVS1) set sail today from its home port of Vancouver , BC The ship is the first of its kind in the Navy and is a standing legacy to President Bill Clinton 'for his foresight in military budget cuts' and his conduct while holding the (formerly dignified) office of President. The ship is constructed nearly entirely from recycled aluminum and is completely solar powered with a top speed of 5 knots. It boasts an arsenal comprised of one (unarmed) F14 Tomcat or one (unarmed) F18 Hornet aircraft which, although they cannot be launched on the 100 foot flight deck, form a very menacing presence. As a standing order, there are no firearms allowed on board. This crew, like the crew aboard the USS Jimmy Carter, is specially trained to avoid conflicts and appease any and all enemies of the United States at all costs. An onboard Type One DNC Universal Translator can send out messages of apology in any language to anyone who may find America offensive. The number of apologies are limitless and though some may seem hollow and disingenuous, the Navy advises all apologies will sound very sincere. In times of conflict, the USS Clinton has orders to seek refuge in Canada . USS BARACK OBAMA Details are vague. But don't you worry..........he has a plan __________________ Oath Keepers NOT ON OUR WATCH www.oathkeepers.org 2nd Amendment to the US Constitution: A well regulated Militia, being necessary to the security of a free State, the right of the people to keep and bear Arms, shall not be infringed. "Democracy is two wolves and a lamb voting on what to have for lunch. Liberty is a well-armed lamb contesting the vote." -- Benjamin Franklin When injustice becomes law, resistance becomes Duty... Thomas Jefferson -->

01-20-2012, 10:33 PM	#2
geds Advanced Senior Member Join Date: Mar 2011 Posts: 3,706	Re: 3 of the USN's newest ships... Classic!

01-21-2012, 06:15 AM	#3
rcairflr Advanced Senior Member Join Date: Jul 2011 Location: Wichita, Ks Posts: 1,313	Re: 3 of the USN's newest ships... Very good. No doubt that Obumer has a plan and I'm sure it comes with some "Hope and change".

01-21-2012, 11:59 AM	#4
howlnmad Advanced Senior Member Join Date: Nov 2008 Location: Harriman, Tn Contributor Posts: 2,565	Re: 3 of the USN's newest ships... Priceless . __________________

01-21-2012, 12:45 PM	#5
hkruss Advanced Senior Member Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Mobile, Al. Posts: 1,092	Re: 3 of the USN's newest ships... . U.S.S. obama SSV-1 (Socialism Spreading Vehicle) Nickname: " 'ol Jackass " Cost: About six trillion so far Service Life: Four years, hopefully Propulsion System: Multi-Fuel system, can run on money provided by Soros, Hollywood stars, Unions and misguided Liberal do-gooders. Can also be propelled literally by the stupidity and naivety of uninformed Americans. Also runs partially upon narcissism and inflated sense of self importance. Burns around $10,000 per second in Taxpayer funds. Armament: 1 - Mk1 Mod1 'BRAY' Anti-Common Sense Device. The 'BRAY', (Bull Sh** Repeating, Always Yakkin') system, works by constantly spewing crap and false information in a constant loud and obnoxious tone, which, if repeated enough, will overcome the common sense of voters unequipped with an anti-B.S. counter-system. 1 - Cloaking Mechanism (also known as 'the media'). This system functions by conveniently suppressing potentially embarrassing info, such as ties to known terrorists, 20 year membership in the church of a vitriol spewing anti- American preacher, and admitted admiration and association with college Communist groups and Marxist professors. This system has proven to be very effective. After all, how much do we REALLY know about the past of the ship's namesake? 2 - BIGASS ears. These detect any incoming threats and immediately dispatch nebbish Press Secretaries or Debbie Wasserman-Shultz to counter the threats. 1 - "B.O.W.", (bend over, welcome) System. This system allows the obama to bend at the waist to signify weakness or submission to foreign potentates or any other dignitaries deemed important enough to have their butt kissed. Despite it's unassuming, goofy appearance, the U.S.S. obama possesses the power to bring down the most powerful Nation the World has ever seen by basically turning it into France. C'mon, you want to be like France, oui? . Attached Images __________________ obama - "non gratum anus rodentum"

01-21-2012, 12:59 PM	#6
joncutt87 Advanced Senior Member Join Date: May 2011 Location: Kannapolis, NC Contributor Posts: 1,419	Re: 3 of the USN's newest ships... Ha __________________ Four words to live by: aequitas, veritas, decus, sacrificium

01-21-2012, 08:15 PM	#7
gad1111 V.I.P. Member Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Swanton, Ohio Posts: 272	Re: 3 of the USN's newest ships... Someone should Photoshop that pic so the ass is looking down his nose then it would be just like it's namesake Greg

01-22-2012, 05:05 PM	#8
mjp28 Advanced Senior Member Join Date: Dec 2011 Location: anytown, OHIO Contributor Posts: 3,047	Re: 3 of the USN's newest ships... USS Reagan, what a ship! I've been to the Arizona Memorial, quite a stunning contrast. Then I'm reading the USS WJC first thinking when did he......gotcha! That was funny.