You Might Be a Redneck... - The Firearms Forum

Gunfyter · 02-27-2006, 10:19 AM

You might be an extreme redneck if ...

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1. You let your 14-year-old daughter smoke at the dinner table in front of her kids.

2. The Blue Book value of your truck goes up and down depending on how much gas is in it.

3. You've been married three times and still have the same in-laws.

4. You think a woman who is "out of your league" bowls on a different night.

5. You wonder how service stations keep their rest-rooms so clean.

6. Someone in your family died right after saying, "Hey, guys, watch this."

7. You think Dom Perignon is a Mafia leader.

8. Your wife's hairdo was once ruined by a ceiling fan.

9. Your junior prom offered day care.

10. You think the last words of the "Star-Spangled Banner" are "Gentlemen, start your engines."

11. You lit a match in the bathroom and your house exploded right off its wheels.

12. The Halloween pumpkin on your porch has more teeth than your spouse.

13. You have to go outside to get something from the fridge.

14. One of your kids was born on a pool table.

15. You need one more hole punched in your card to get a freebie at the
House of Tattoos.

16. You can't get married to your sweetheart because there's a law against it.

17. You think loading the dishwasher means getting your wife drunk.

An Oklahoma couple, both bonified rednecks, had 9 children.
They went to the doctor to see about getting the husband "fixed". The doctor asked them why, after nine children, would they choose to do this. The husband replied that they had read in a recent article that one out of every ten children being born in North America was Mexican, and they didn't want a Mexican baby because neither of them could speak Spanish.
__________________

SouthernMoss · 02-27-2006, 12:04 PM

Marlin · 02-27-2006, 12:25 PM

Always get a chuckle over this one.

The last part is bad, GF. Very BAD!!!!!!!!!

Glockgod · 02-27-2006, 01:06 PM

if you've ever washed dishes with a garden hose,BTDT

Deputy Dawg · 02-27-2006, 01:11 PM

inplanotx · 02-27-2006, 01:24 PM

Bruce FLinch · 02-28-2006, 09:06 PM

KNEE-SLAPPER! LOL

flopshot · 02-28-2006, 09:14 PM

did ya know the toothbrush was invented in west virginia ? anywhere else and it would have been called a "teeth" brush.
if you go to family reunions to pick up women you might be a redneck.

blackhawkkid308 · 03-03-2006, 03:50 AM

the so-called sissy pistol went through, WWI, WWII, Korea, Viet Nam, plus all points in between need i say anymore.
blackhawkkid223 1911's forever

02-27-2006, 10:19 AM	#1
Gunfyter Advanced Senior Member Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: Western Maryland Posts: 1,956	You Might Be a Redneck... You might be an extreme redneck if ... -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 1. You let your 14-year-old daughter smoke at the dinner table in front of her kids. 2. The Blue Book value of your truck goes up and down depending on how much gas is in it. 3. You've been married three times and still have the same in-laws. 4. You think a woman who is "out of your league" bowls on a different night. 5. You wonder how service stations keep their rest-rooms so clean. 6. Someone in your family died right after saying, "Hey, guys, watch this." 7. You think Dom Perignon is a Mafia leader. 8. Your wife's hairdo was once ruined by a ceiling fan. 9. Your junior prom offered day care. 10. You think the last words of the "Star-Spangled Banner" are "Gentlemen, start your engines." 11. You lit a match in the bathroom and your house exploded right off its wheels. 12. The Halloween pumpkin on your porch has more teeth than your spouse. 13. You have to go outside to get something from the fridge. 14. One of your kids was born on a pool table. 15. You need one more hole punched in your card to get a freebie at the House of Tattoos. 16. You can't get married to your sweetheart because there's a law against it. 17. You think loading the dishwasher means getting your wife drunk. An Oklahoma couple, both bonified rednecks, had 9 children. They went to the doctor to see about getting the husband "fixed". The doctor asked them why, after nine children, would they choose to do this. The husband replied that they had read in a recent article that one out of every ten children being born in North America was Mexican, and they didn't want a Mexican baby because neither of them could speak Spanish. __________________ __________________ Anything worth shooting once, is worth shooting again. If it ain't broke, break it. Someone needs the work -->

02-27-2006, 12:04 PM	#2
SouthernMoss Admin Tech Staff Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: SW MS Contributor Posts: 10,651	Re: You Might Be a Redneck... __________________ My Second protects your First "I declare to you that woman must not depend upon the protection of man, but must be taught to protect herself, and there I take my stand." - Susan B Anthony

02-27-2006, 12:25 PM	#3
Marlin TFF Admin Staff Chief Counselor Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: At SouthernMoss' side forever! Contributor Posts: 13,853	Re: You Might Be a Redneck... Always get a chuckle over this one. The last part is bad, GF. Very BAD!!!!!!!!! Attached Images __________________ *The flag represents a living country and is itself considered a living thing.* *The only criminal class native to the United States is Congress.*

02-27-2006, 01:06 PM	#4
Glockgod V.I.P. Member Join Date: Aug 2005 Posts: 61	Re: You Might Be a Redneck... if you've ever washed dishes with a garden hose,BTDT __________________ "Get yourself a Glock and lose that nickle plated sissy pistol" Tommy Lee Jones-US Marshals.

02-27-2006, 01:11 PM	#5
Deputy Dawg Advanced Senior Member Join Date: Aug 2005 Location: Central Texas Gulf Coast Posts: 2,229	Re: You Might Be a Redneck... __________________ LOCK and LOAD................................... GOD, GUNS,GUTS the three that keep us FREE!!!!

02-27-2006, 01:24 PM	#6
inplanotx Advanced Senior Member Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: Texas Posts: 8,897	Re: You Might Be a Redneck... __________________

02-28-2006, 09:06 PM	#7
Bruce FLinch Advanced Senior Member Join Date: Aug 2005 Location: Bay Point, Kali..aka Gun Point Posts: 5,016	Re: You Might Be a Redneck... KNEE-SLAPPER! LOL __________________ A bad day @ the Range, is better than a good day @ work.

02-28-2006, 09:14 PM	#8
flopshot V.I.P. Member Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: North Carolina Posts: 294	Re: You Might Be a Redneck... did ya know the toothbrush was invented in west virginia ? anywhere else and it would have been called a "teeth" brush. if you go to family reunions to pick up women you might be a redneck. __________________ take a kid shooting... they are the next vote

03-03-2006, 03:50 AM	#9
blackhawkkid308 Senior Member Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: pensacola florida Posts: 871	Re: You Might Be a Redneck... the so-called sissy pistol went through, WWI, WWII, Korea, Viet Nam, plus all points in between need i say anymore. blackhawkkid223 1911's forever __________________ 9-11-01 lest we forget AMEN