A cowboy named Bud - The Firearms Forum

cycloneman · 08-01-2010, 08:08 PM

> > A cowboy named Bud was overseeing his herd in a remote mountainous pasture in California when suddenly a brand-new BMW advanced toward him out of a cloud of dust.
> >
> > The driver, a young man in a Brioni suit, Gucci shoes, RayBan sunglasses and YSL tie, leaned out the window and asked the cowboy, "If I tell you exactly how many cows and calves you have in your herd, Will you give me a calf?"
> >
> > Bud looks at the man, obviously a yuppie, then looks at his peacefully grazing herd and calmly answers, "Sure, Why not?"
> >
> > The yuppie parks his car, whips out his Dell notebook computer, connects it to his Cingular RAZR V3 cell phone, and surfs to a NASA page on the Internet, where he calls up a GPS satellite to get an exact fix on his location which he then feeds to another NASA satellite that scans the area in an ultra-high-resolution photo.
> >
> > The young man then opens the digital photo in Adobe Photoshop and exports it to an image processing facility in Hamburg , Germany ...
> >
> > Within seconds, he receives an email on his Palm Pilot that the image has been processed and the data stored. He then accesses an MS-SQL database through an ODBC connected Excel spreadsheet with email on his Blackberry and, after a few minutes, receives a response.
> >
> > Finally, he prints out a full-color, 150-page report on his hi-tech, miniaturized HP LaserJet printer, turns to the cowboy and says, "You have exactly 1,586 cows and calves."
> >
> > "That's right. Well, I guess you can take one of my calves," says Bud.
> >
> > He watches the young man select one of the animals and looks on with amusement as the young man stuffs it into the trunk of his car.
> >
> > Then Bud says to the young man, "Hey, if I can tell you exactly what your business is, will you give me back my calf?"
> >
> > The young man thinks about it for a second and then says, "Okay, why not?"
> >
> > "You're a Congressman for the U.S. Government", says Bud.
> >
> > "Wow! That's correct," says the yuppie, "but how did you guess that?"
> >
> > "No guessing required." answered the cowboy. "You showed up here even though nobody called you; you want to get paid for an answer I already knew, to a question I never asked. You used millions of dollars worth of equipment trying to show me how much smarter than me you are; and you don't know a thing about how working people make a living - or about cows, for that matter. This is a herd of sheep. ......
> >
> > Now give me back my dog.
> >
> >
> >

pinecone70 · 08-01-2010, 08:19 PM

Eddie N · 08-02-2010, 11:00 AM

They sure know how to waste time and money!

08-01-2010, 08:08 PM	#1
cycloneman Advanced Senior Member Join Date: Dec 2008 Location: Louisiana Posts: 7,437	A cowboy named Bud > > A cowboy named Bud was overseeing his herd in a remote mountainous pasture in California when suddenly a brand-new BMW advanced toward him out of a cloud of dust. > > > > The driver, a young man in a Brioni suit, Gucci shoes, RayBan sunglasses and YSL tie, leaned out the window and asked the cowboy, "If I tell you exactly how many cows and calves you have in your herd, Will you give me a calf?" > > > > Bud looks at the man, obviously a yuppie, then looks at his peacefully grazing herd and calmly answers, "Sure, Why not?" > > > > The yuppie parks his car, whips out his Dell notebook computer, connects it to his Cingular RAZR V3 cell phone, and surfs to a NASA page on the Internet, where he calls up a GPS satellite to get an exact fix on his location which he then feeds to another NASA satellite that scans the area in an ultra-high-resolution photo. > > > > The young man then opens the digital photo in Adobe Photoshop and exports it to an image processing facility in Hamburg , Germany ... > > > > Within seconds, he receives an email on his Palm Pilot that the image has been processed and the data stored. He then accesses an MS-SQL database through an ODBC connected Excel spreadsheet with email on his Blackberry and, after a few minutes, receives a response. > > > > Finally, he prints out a full-color, 150-page report on his hi-tech, miniaturized HP LaserJet printer, turns to the cowboy and says, "You have exactly 1,586 cows and calves." > > > > "That's right. Well, I guess you can take one of my calves," says Bud. > > > > He watches the young man select one of the animals and looks on with amusement as the young man stuffs it into the trunk of his car. > > > > Then Bud says to the young man, "Hey, if I can tell you exactly what your business is, will you give me back my calf?" > > > > The young man thinks about it for a second and then says, "Okay, why not?" > > > > "You're a Congressman for the U.S. Government", says Bud. > > > > "Wow! That's correct," says the yuppie, "but how did you guess that?" > > > > "No guessing required." answered the cowboy. "You showed up here even though nobody called you; you want to get paid for an answer I already knew, to a question I never asked. You used millions of dollars worth of equipment trying to show me how much smarter than me you are; and you don't know a thing about how working people make a living - or about cows, for that matter. This is a herd of sheep. ...... > > > > Now give me back my dog. > > > > > > __________________ Who are you going to serve today? -->

08-01-2010, 08:19 PM	#2
pinecone70 Advanced Senior Member Join Date: Jul 2008 Location: Minnesota Gal! Posts: 4,730	Re: A cowboy named Bud __________________ _____________________________________________ "Miss Scarlet, in the library...with a revolver...."

08-02-2010, 11:00 AM	#3
Eddie N Advanced Senior Member Join Date: Apr 2009 Location: Colorado Contributor Posts: 1,192	Re: A cowboy named Bud They sure know how to waste time and money! __________________ September 11, 2001 Hope and Change: I hope there's some change left in my paycheck! 2012: Saying good bye to my paycheck.