From Craig's List ......... - The Firearms Forum

JohnHenry · 11-02-2011, 07:48 AM

AN ACTUAL CRAIG'S LIST PERSONALS AD

To the Guy Who Tried to Mug Me in Downtown Savannah night before last.
Date: 2010-09-27, 1:43 a.m. E.S.T.
I was the guy wearing the black Burberry jacket that you demanded that I hand over, shortly after you pulled the knife on me and my girlfriend, threatening our lives. You also asked for my girlfriend's purse and earrings. I can only hope that you somehow come across this rather important message.
First, I'd like to apologize for your embarrassment; I didn't expect you to actually crap in your pants when I drew my pistol after you took my jacket.. The evening was not that cold, and I was wearing the jacket for a reason.. my girlfriend was happy that I just returned safely from my 2nd tour as a Combat Marine in Afghanistan.. She had just bought me that Kimber Custom Model 1911 .45 ACP pistol for my birthday, and we had picked up a shoulder holster for it that very evening. Obviously you agree that it is a very intimidating weapon when pointed at your head ... isn't it?!
I know it probably wasn't fun walking back to wherever you'd come from with that brown sludge in your pants. I'm sure it was even worse walking bare-footed since I made you leave your shoes, cell phone, and wallet with me. [That prevented you from calling or running to your buddies to come help mug us again].
After I called your mother or "Momma" as you had her listed in your cell, I explained the entire episode of what you'd done. Then I went and filled up my gas tank as well as those of four other people in the gas station, -- on your credit card. The guy with the big motor home took 153 gallons and was extremely grateful!
I gave your shoes to a homeless guy outside Vinnie Van Go Go's, along with all the cash in your wallet. [That made his day!]
I then threw your wallet into the big pink "pimp mobile" that was parked at the curb .... after I broke the windshield and side window and keyed the entire driver's side of the car.
Later, I called a bunch of phone sex numbers from your cell phone. Ma Bell just now shut down the line, although I only used the phone for a little over a day now, so what 's going on with that? Earlier, I managed to get in two threatening phone calls to the DA's office and one to the FBI, while mentioning President Obama as my possible target.
The FBI guy seemed really intense and we had a nice long chat (I guess while he traced your number etc.).
;In a way, perhaps I should apologize for not killing you ... but I feel this type of retribution is a far more appropriate punishment for your threatened crime. I wish you well as you try to sort through some of these rather immediate pressing issues, and can only hope that you have the opportunity to reflect upon, and perhaps reconsider, the career path you've chosen to pursue in life.. Remember, next time you might not be so lucky. Have a good day!
Thoughtfully yours, Semper Fi,
Alex

jack404 · 11-02-2011, 07:52 AM

jstgsn · 11-02-2011, 08:00 AM

two thunbs up.

jlloyd73 · 11-02-2011, 09:49 AM

terryu1 · 11-02-2011, 10:22 AM

Ha Good one

H-D · 11-02-2011, 11:36 AM

LOVE IT

Brisk44 · 11-02-2011, 11:44 AM

Love the way that guy thinks.

rcairflr · 11-02-2011, 05:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Brisk44

Love the way that guy thinks.

Yes, I;m with you. I like the way the writer of this ficticious story thinks. But the truth is that it is fiction. This was never a Craigs list aid, it was a story created with the internet boom.

American Leader · 11-02-2011, 05:38 PM

Still like it JH, thanks for the post.

HunterAlpha1 · 11-02-2011, 05:56 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by rcairflr

Yes, I;m with you. I like the way the writer of this ficticious story thinks. But the truth is that it is fiction. This was never a Craigs list aid, it was a story created with the internet boom.

please be quiet, Mr. Par T. Pooper

dustydog · 11-02-2011, 06:00 PM

Priceless..............

rcairflr · 11-02-2011, 09:49 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by HunterAlpha1

please be quiet, Mr. Par T. Pooper

Sorry, I did mean to ruin everyones party.....

geds · 11-02-2011, 11:32 PM

Even if not true, it is what we all wish would happen under similar circumstances!

CampingJosh · 11-02-2011, 11:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by rcairflr

Yes, I;m with you. I like the way the writer of this ficticious story thinks. But the truth is that it is fiction. This was never a Craigs list aid, it was a story created with the internet boom.

I'm sure you're right, but I doubt there is more fiction in here than in most online "personal" ads.

howlnmad · 11-03-2011, 04:04 AM

I've seen that posted somewhere awhile back. It still makes me chuckle.

11-02-2011, 07:48 AM	#1
JohnHenry Advanced Senior Member Join Date: Apr 2011 Location: Livingston county, Michigan Posts: 1,219	From Craig's List ......... AN ACTUAL CRAIG'S LIST PERSONALS AD To the Guy Who Tried to Mug Me in Downtown Savannah night before last. Date: 2010-09-27, 1:43 a.m. E.S.T. I was the guy wearing the black Burberry jacket that you demanded that I hand over, shortly after you pulled the knife on me and my girlfriend, threatening our lives. You also asked for my girlfriend's purse and earrings. I can only hope that you somehow come across this rather important message. First, I'd like to apologize for your embarrassment; I didn't expect you to actually crap in your pants when I drew my pistol after you took my jacket.. The evening was not that cold, and I was wearing the jacket for a reason.. my girlfriend was happy that I just returned safely from my 2nd tour as a Combat Marine in Afghanistan.. She had just bought me that Kimber Custom Model 1911 .45 ACP pistol for my birthday, and we had picked up a shoulder holster for it that very evening. Obviously you agree that it is a very intimidating weapon when pointed at your head ... isn't it?! I know it probably wasn't fun walking back to wherever you'd come from with that brown sludge in your pants. I'm sure it was even worse walking bare-footed since I made you leave your shoes, cell phone, and wallet with me. [That prevented you from calling or running to your buddies to come help mug us again]. After I called your mother or "Momma" as you had her listed in your cell, I explained the entire episode of what you'd done. Then I went and filled up my gas tank as well as those of four other people in the gas station, -- on your credit card. The guy with the big motor home took 153 gallons and was extremely grateful! I gave your shoes to a homeless guy outside Vinnie Van Go Go's, along with all the cash in your wallet. [That made his day!] I then threw your wallet into the big pink "pimp mobile" that was parked at the curb .... after I broke the windshield and side window and keyed the entire driver's side of the car. Later, I called a bunch of phone sex numbers from your cell phone. Ma Bell just now shut down the line, although I only used the phone for a little over a day now, so what 's going on with that? Earlier, I managed to get in two threatening phone calls to the DA's office and one to the FBI, while mentioning President Obama as my possible target. The FBI guy seemed really intense and we had a nice long chat (I guess while he traced your number etc.). ;In a way, perhaps I should apologize for not killing you ... but I feel this type of retribution is a far more appropriate punishment for your threatened crime. I wish you well as you try to sort through some of these rather immediate pressing issues, and can only hope that you have the opportunity to reflect upon, and perhaps reconsider, the career path you've chosen to pursue in life.. Remember, next time you might not be so lucky. Have a good day! Thoughtfully yours, Semper Fi, Alex __________________ Freedom .... Is Never Free ! We need Term Limits .... Send the "Professional Politicians" home . -->

11-02-2011, 07:52 AM	#2
jack404 Former Guest Join Date: Jan 2010 Location: Australia Contributor Posts: 17,622	Re: From Craig's List .........

11-02-2011, 08:00 AM	#3
jstgsn Advanced Senior Member Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Milford, Delaware Contributor Posts: 1,273	Re: From Craig's List ......... two thunbs up. __________________ Don’t pick a fight with an old man. If he is too old to fight, he will just kill you.

11-02-2011, 09:49 AM	#4
jlloyd73 Advanced Senior Member Join Date: Nov 2010 Contributor Posts: 1,932	Re: From Craig's List ......... LOL __________________ --------------------------------------------------- The only thing better than good family is good friends. J and D Lloyd Get ready...it's getting "real" and really fast!

11-02-2011, 10:22 AM	#5
terryu1 Advanced Senior Member Join Date: Oct 2009 Location: NE Pennsylvania Contributor Posts: 1,248	Re: From Craig's List ......... Ha Good one __________________ ARMED INFIDEL

11-02-2011, 11:36 AM	#6
H-D Advanced Senior Member Join Date: Jun 2011 Location: Mississippi Posts: 1,334	Re: From Craig's List ......... LOVE IT __________________ And I saw heaven opened, and behold a white horse; and he that sat upon him was called Faithful and True, and in righteousness he doth judge and make war. Revelation 19:11

11-02-2011, 11:44 AM	#7
Brisk44 Advanced Senior Member Join Date: Mar 2011 Location: Iowa Contributor Posts: 1,747	Re: From Craig's List ......... Love the way that guy thinks.

11-02-2011, 05:38 PM	#9
American Leader Advanced Senior Member Join Date: Mar 2011 Location: Iowa Contributor Posts: 1,630	Re: From Craig's List ......... Still like it JH, thanks for the post.

11-02-2011, 06:00 PM	#11
dustydog V.I.P. Member Join Date: Sep 2011 Posts: 208	Re: From Craig's List ......... Priceless..............

11-02-2011, 11:32 PM	#13
geds Advanced Senior Member Join Date: Mar 2011 Posts: 3,706	Re: From Craig's List ......... Even if not true, it is what we all wish would happen under similar circumstances!

11-03-2011, 04:04 AM	#15
howlnmad Advanced Senior Member Join Date: Nov 2008 Location: Harriman, Tn Contributor Posts: 2,571	Re: From Craig's List ......... I've seen that posted somewhere awhile back. It still makes me chuckle. __________________