How to clean yore outhouse. - The Firearms Forum

berto64 · 08-21-2007, 10:15 PM

how to clean your outhouse.

Ma and Pa were two hillbillies living out on a farm.

Pa has found out that the hole under the outhouse is full.

He goes into the house and tells Ma that he doesn't know what to do to empty the hole.

Ma says, "Why don't you go ask the young'n down the road?

He must be smart 'cause he's a college gradjyate."

So Pa drives down to the neighbor's house and asks him, "Mr. College gradjyate, my outhouse hole is full, and I don't know what to do to empty it."

The young'n tells him, "Get yourself two sticks of dynamite, one with a short fuse and one with a long fuse.

Put them both under the outhouse and light them both at the same time.

The first one will go off and shoot the outhouse in the air.

While it's in the air the second one will then go off and spread the poop all across your farm, fertilizing your ground.

The outhouse should then come back down to the same spot atop the now-empty hole.."

Pa thanks the neighbor, then drives to the hardware store and picks up two sticks of dynamite, one with a short fuse and one with a long fuse.

He goes home and puts them under the outhouse. He then lights them and runs behind a tree.

All of a sudden, Ma comes running out of the house and into the outhouse!

Off goes the first stick of dynamite .... shooting the outhouse into the air.

BOOM! Off goes the second stick of dynamite . spreading poop all over the farm

WHAM! The outhouse comes crashing back down atop the hole.....

Pa races to the outhouse, throws open the door and asks, "Ma, are you all right??!!"

As she pulls up her panties she says...
"Yeah, but I'm sure glad I didn't fart in the kitchen

Pistolenschutze · 08-21-2007, 10:38 PM

Berto, for that one Marlin's liable to hand you a can of gasoline and put you on permanent latrine detail.

rooter · 08-22-2007, 04:55 AM

How do I know a lot of young people don't know what an OUTHOUSE is--let me ramble here for a few minutes. Though I have never played golf in my life, I have been made aware of what a 'HOLE-IN-ONE' is---many years ago my friend Richard Brown, an avid golfer, requested I construct a small wooden, desk size outhouse as a trophy thingee---to hold the proud golfers golf ball that they had achieved the hole in one with----up over the hanging open door, I branded into the wood YE OLDE ONE HOLER. Though Brownie has passed on, I still make these trophy holders---have one sitting here over my desk---a rustic, pine wood---rough split wood with wood shingles on the roof---about 9 inches tall and sitting on a finished base that has space for a brass name plate to be engraved with the name of the winner and what course---how many yards---and date.....oh yes, I've made up in the hundreds---I'm going to send The Judge a picture and a poem and ask him to post if here---if you are interested in a hole-in-one outhouse, give me a heads-up--pay the postage, and I'll send you one...Chief

Marlin · 08-22-2007, 10:52 AM

Chief, funny you sent this to me today......

Thought we might share it with these wonderful folks - - -

08-21-2007, 10:15 PM	#1
berto64 VMBB Admin Staff Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: Owyhee County, Idaho Contributor Posts: 7,388	How to clean yore outhouse. how to clean your outhouse. Ma and Pa were two hillbillies living out on a farm. Pa has found out that the hole under the outhouse is full. He goes into the house and tells Ma that he doesn't know what to do to empty the hole. Ma says, "Why don't you go ask the young'n down the road? He must be smart 'cause he's a college gradjyate." So Pa drives down to the neighbor's house and asks him, "Mr. College gradjyate, my outhouse hole is full, and I don't know what to do to empty it." The young'n tells him, "Get yourself two sticks of dynamite, one with a short fuse and one with a long fuse. Put them both under the outhouse and light them both at the same time. The first one will go off and shoot the outhouse in the air. While it's in the air the second one will then go off and spread the poop all across your farm, fertilizing your ground. The outhouse should then come back down to the same spot atop the now-empty hole.." Pa thanks the neighbor, then drives to the hardware store and picks up two sticks of dynamite, one with a short fuse and one with a long fuse. He goes home and puts them under the outhouse. He then lights them and runs behind a tree. All of a sudden, Ma comes running out of the house and into the outhouse! Off goes the first stick of dynamite .... shooting the outhouse into the air. BOOM! Off goes the second stick of dynamite . spreading poop all over the farm WHAM! The outhouse comes crashing back down atop the hole..... Pa races to the outhouse, throws open the door and asks, "Ma, are you all right??!!" As she pulls up her panties she says... "Yeah, but I'm sure glad I didn't fart in the kitchen __________________ Be who you are & say what you will, Those that matter won't mind and those that mind don't matter. I'm a bitter clinger, One Nation Under God. -->

08-21-2007, 10:38 PM	#2
Pistolenschutze Advanced Senior Member Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: Colorado Posts: 13,094	Re: How to clean yore outhouse. Berto, for that one Marlin's liable to hand you a can of gasoline and put you on permanent latrine detail. __________________ --Pistolenschutze (Pistol Shooter)

08-22-2007, 04:55 AM	#3
rooter VMBB Senior Chief Of Staff Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: Marty Robbins old hometown, Glendale Arizona--a suburb of Phoenix. Contributor Posts: 9,271	Re: How to clean yore outhouse. How do I know a lot of young people don't know what an OUTHOUSE is--let me ramble here for a few minutes. Though I have never played golf in my life, I have been made aware of what a 'HOLE-IN-ONE' is---many years ago my friend Richard Brown, an avid golfer, requested I construct a small wooden, desk size outhouse as a trophy thingee---to hold the proud golfers golf ball that they had achieved the hole in one with----up over the hanging open door, I branded into the wood YE OLDE ONE HOLER. Though Brownie has passed on, I still make these trophy holders---have one sitting here over my desk---a rustic, pine wood---rough split wood with wood shingles on the roof---about 9 inches tall and sitting on a finished base that has space for a brass name plate to be engraved with the name of the winner and what course---how many yards---and date.....oh yes, I've made up in the hundreds---I'm going to send The Judge a picture and a poem and ask him to post if here---if you are interested in a hole-in-one outhouse, give me a heads-up--pay the postage, and I'll send you one...Chief __________________

08-22-2007, 10:52 AM	#4
Marlin TFF Admin Staff Chief Counselor Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: At SouthernMoss' side forever! Contributor Posts: 13,853	Re: How to clean yore outhouse. Chief, funny you sent this to me today...... Thought we might share it with these wonderful folks - - - Attached Images