The man and the Ostrich - The Firearms Forum

Gunfyter · 04-28-2006, 11:13 AM

Man walks into a restaurant with a full-grown ostrich behind him.
The waitress asks for their orders. The man says, "A hamburger, fries
and a coke," and turns to the ostrich, "And you dear?"

"I'll have the same," says the ostrich.

A short time later the waitress returns with the order.
"That will be $9.40 please," she says and the man reaches into his
pocket and pulls out the exact change for payment.

The next day, the man and the ostrich come again and the man says, "A
hamburger, fries, and a coke."

The ostrich says, "I'll have the same."
Again the man reaches into his pocket and pays with exact change.

This becomes routine until the two enter again later in the week.
"The usual?" asks the waitress.

"No, this is Friday night, so I will have a steak, baked potato, and
salad," says the man.

"Same," says the ostrich.
Shortly the waitress brings the order and says, "That will be $32.62."
Once again the man pulls the exact change out of his pocket and places it on
the table.

The waitress can't hold back her curiosity any longer. "Excuse me,
sir. How do you manage to always come up with the exact change out of your
pocket every time?"

"Well," says the man, "several years ago I was cleaning the attic and
found an old lamp. When I rubbed it a Genie appeared and offered me two
wishes. My first wish was that if I ever had to pay for anything, I would
just put my hand in my pocket and the right amount of money would always be there."

"That's brilliant!" says the waitress. "Most people would wish for a
million dollars or something, but you'll always be as rich as you want for
as long as you live!"

"That's right. Whether it's a gallon of milk or a Rolls Royce, the
exact money is always there," says the man.

The waitress asks, "But, sir, what's with the ostrich?"

The man lets out a big sigh , pauses, and then answers,
"Well ... My second wish was for a tall chick with a big a$$ and long legs who agrees with everything I say."
The Ostrich says, "thats right"

Marlin · 04-28-2006, 12:09 PM

I Thought I'd seen all the WORST of dem.

I wuz sssooooooooo wrung!!

inplanotx · 04-28-2006, 01:24 PM

Best stick with the crabbin' GF!

SouthernMoss · 04-28-2006, 01:46 PM

southernshooter · 04-28-2006, 10:40 PM

Bruce FLinch · 04-29-2006, 12:58 AM

makes me wonder what kind of bird you would get, if you had asked for a small butt?

04-28-2006, 11:13 AM	#1
Gunfyter Advanced Senior Member Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: Western Maryland Posts: 1,956	The man and the Ostrich Man walks into a restaurant with a full-grown ostrich behind him. The waitress asks for their orders. The man says, "A hamburger, fries and a coke," and turns to the ostrich, "And you dear?" "I'll have the same," says the ostrich. A short time later the waitress returns with the order. "That will be $9.40 please," she says and the man reaches into his pocket and pulls out the exact change for payment. The next day, the man and the ostrich come again and the man says, "A hamburger, fries, and a coke." The ostrich says, "I'll have the same." Again the man reaches into his pocket and pays with exact change. This becomes routine until the two enter again later in the week. "The usual?" asks the waitress. "No, this is Friday night, so I will have a steak, baked potato, and salad," says the man. "Same," says the ostrich. Shortly the waitress brings the order and says, "That will be $32.62." Once again the man pulls the exact change out of his pocket and places it on the table. The waitress can't hold back her curiosity any longer. "Excuse me, sir. How do you manage to always come up with the exact change out of your pocket every time?" "Well," says the man, "several years ago I was cleaning the attic and found an old lamp. When I rubbed it a Genie appeared and offered me two wishes. My first wish was that if I ever had to pay for anything, I would just put my hand in my pocket and the right amount of money would always be there." "That's brilliant!" says the waitress. "Most people would wish for a million dollars or something, but you'll always be as rich as you want for as long as you live!" "That's right. Whether it's a gallon of milk or a Rolls Royce, the exact money is always there," says the man. The waitress asks, "But, sir, what's with the ostrich?" The man lets out a big sigh , pauses, and then answers, "Well ... My second wish was for a tall chick with a big a$$ and long legs who agrees with everything I say." The Ostrich says, "thats right" __________________ Anything worth shooting once, is worth shooting again. If it ain't broke, break it. Someone needs the work -->

04-28-2006, 12:09 PM	#2
Marlin TFF Admin Staff Chief Counselor Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: At SouthernMoss' side forever! Contributor Posts: 13,853	Re: The man and the Ostrich I Thought I'd seen all the WORST of dem. I wuz sssooooooooo wrung!! __________________ *The flag represents a living country and is itself considered a living thing.* *The only criminal class native to the United States is Congress.*

04-28-2006, 01:24 PM	#3
inplanotx Advanced Senior Member Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: Texas Posts: 8,897	Re: The man and the Ostrich Best stick with the crabbin' GF! __________________

04-28-2006, 01:46 PM	#4
SouthernMoss Admin Tech Staff Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: SW MS Contributor Posts: 10,651	Re: The man and the Ostrich __________________ My Second protects your First "I declare to you that woman must not depend upon the protection of man, but must be taught to protect herself, and there I take my stand." - Susan B Anthony

04-28-2006, 10:40 PM	#5
southernshooter Advanced Senior Member Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: Deep South Mississippi Posts: 5,943	Re: The man and the Ostrich __________________ Only you can see this

04-29-2006, 12:58 AM	#6
Bruce FLinch Advanced Senior Member Join Date: Aug 2005 Location: Bay Point, Kali..aka Gun Point Posts: 5,016	Re: The man and the Ostrich makes me wonder what kind of bird you would get, if you had asked for a small butt? __________________ A bad day @ the Range, is better than a good day @ work.