The ant and the grasshopper... - The Firearms Forum

glocknut · 07-10-2007, 05:20 PM

America Today - The Ant and the Grasshopper

OLD VERSION:

The ant works hard in the withering heat all
summer long, building his house and laying up
supplies for the winter.

The grasshopper thinks the ant is a fool and
laughs and dances and plays the summer away.
Come winter, the ant is warm and well fed. The
grasshopper has no food or shelter, so he dies
out in the cold.

MORAL OF THE STORY: Be responsible for yourself!
---------------------------------

MODERN VERSION:

The ant works hard in the withering heat all
summer long, building his house and laying up
supplies for the winter.

The grasshopper thinks the ant is a fool and
laughs and dances and plays the summer away.

Come winter, the shivering grasshopper calls
a press conference and demands to know why the
ant should be allowed to be warm and well fed
while others are cold and starving.

CBS, NBC, PBS, CNN, and ABC show up to
provide pictures of the shivering grasshopper next to
a video of the ant in his comfortable home with a table
filled with food.

America is stunned by the sharp contrast.

How can this be, that in a country of such wealth,
this poor grasshopper is allowed to suffer so?

Kermit the Frog appears on Oprah with the
grasshopper, and everybody cries when they sing,
"It's Not Easy Being Green."

Jesse Jackson stages a demonstration in front of
the ant's house where the news stations film the group
singing, "We shall overcome." Jesse then has the group
kneel down to pray to God for the grasshopper's sake.

Nancy Pelosi & John Kerry exclaim in an interview
with Larry King that the ant has gotten rich off the back
of the grasshopper, and both call for an immediate tax
hike on the ant to make him pay his fair share.

Finally, the EEOC drafts the Economic Equity &
Anti-Grasshopper Act retroactive to the beginning of
the summer.

The ant is fined for failing to hire a proportionate
number of green bugs and, having nothing left to pay
his retroactive taxes, his home is confiscated by the
government.

Hillary gets her former employer, the Rose Law
Firm, to represent the grasshopper in a defamation suit
against the ant, and the case is tried before a jury
comprised of single-parent welfare grasshoppers.

The ant loses the case.

The story ends as we see the grasshopper finishing
up the last bits of the ant's food while the government
house he is in, which just happens to be the ant's old
house, crumbles around him because he doesn't
maintain it.

The ant has disappeared in the snow.

The grasshopper is found dead in a drug related
incident and the house, now abandoned, is taken over
by a gang of spiders who terrorize the once peaceful
neighborhood.

MORAL OF THE STORY: Be careful how you vote.

WarSteed · 07-10-2007, 05:37 PM

Can i be Kermit the Frog?

358 winchester · 07-12-2007, 06:17 PM

Dang Glocknut that is a good one, I am stealing it!

durk · 07-12-2007, 08:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 358 winchester

Dang Glocknut that is a good one, I am stealing it!

Yes! Very Good!

Rommelvon · 07-12-2007, 08:50 PM

excellant...and sadly so very true

07-10-2007, 05:20 PM	#1
glocknut Advanced Senior Member Join Date: Dec 2003 Location: THE FORUM MASCOTT... Posts: 12,482	The ant and the grasshopper... America Today - The Ant and the Grasshopper OLD VERSION: The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks the ant is a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away. Come winter, the ant is warm and well fed. The grasshopper has no food or shelter, so he dies out in the cold. MORAL OF THE STORY: Be responsible for yourself! --------------------------------- MODERN VERSION: The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks the ant is a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away. Come winter, the shivering grasshopper calls a press conference and demands to know why the ant should be allowed to be warm and well fed while others are cold and starving. CBS, NBC, PBS, CNN, and ABC show up to provide pictures of the shivering grasshopper next to a video of the ant in his comfortable home with a table filled with food. America is stunned by the sharp contrast. How can this be, that in a country of such wealth, this poor grasshopper is allowed to suffer so? Kermit the Frog appears on Oprah with the grasshopper, and everybody cries when they sing, "It's Not Easy Being Green." Jesse Jackson stages a demonstration in front of the ant's house where the news stations film the group singing, "We shall overcome." Jesse then has the group kneel down to pray to God for the grasshopper's sake. Nancy Pelosi & John Kerry exclaim in an interview with Larry King that the ant has gotten rich off the back of the grasshopper, and both call for an immediate tax hike on the ant to make him pay his fair share. Finally, the EEOC drafts the Economic Equity & Anti-Grasshopper Act retroactive to the beginning of the summer. The ant is fined for failing to hire a proportionate number of green bugs and, having nothing left to pay his retroactive taxes, his home is confiscated by the government. Hillary gets her former employer, the Rose Law Firm, to represent the grasshopper in a defamation suit against the ant, and the case is tried before a jury comprised of single-parent welfare grasshoppers. The ant loses the case. The story ends as we see the grasshopper finishing up the last bits of the ant's food while the government house he is in, which just happens to be the ant's old house, crumbles around him because he doesn't maintain it. The ant has disappeared in the snow. The grasshopper is found dead in a drug related incident and the house, now abandoned, is taken over by a gang of spiders who terrorize the once peaceful neighborhood. MORAL OF THE STORY: Be careful how you vote. __________________ Where O where are you tonight? Why have you gone and left me alone? I searched to world over and a thought i found true love... You met another and PTThhh you were gone.... -->

07-10-2007, 05:37 PM	#2
WarSteed V.I.P. Member Join Date: Mar 2007 Posts: 188	Re: The ant and the grasshopper... Can i be Kermit the Frog?

07-12-2007, 06:17 PM	#3
358 winchester TFF Admin Staff Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: Pensacola Fl. area Posts: 7,335	Re: The ant and the grasshopper... Dang Glocknut that is a good one, I am stealing it! __________________ Administrator & Owner RangeDay.com Proud, White, Heterosexual, Gun Owning, Southern American, Christian. Any question about where I stand?

07-12-2007, 08:50 PM	#5
Rommelvon Advanced Senior Member Join Date: Aug 2006 Location: Goldsboro, NC Posts: 1,452	Re: The ant and the grasshopper... excellant...and sadly so very true __________________ When the people fear their government, there is tyranny; when the government fears the people, there is liberty. --Thomas Jefferson American By Birth, Southern By The Grace Of God Deo vindice "Duty is the most sublime word in our language. Do your duty in all things. You cannot do more. You should never wish to do less.” Robert E Lee