CROSSING THE RIVER (another joke for ya)

Winter11
Member
Posts: 6
(5/25/01 2:23:35 pm)
| Del All CROSSING THE RIVER (another joke for ya)
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Hey, with my family - I GOT A LOT

One day, a Colonel, a lieutenant and a warrant officer were hiking and unexpectedly came upon a large raging, violent river. They needed to get to the other side, but had no idea of how to do so.

The warrant officer called out to God, praying, "Please God, give me the strength to cross this river." Poof! God gave him big arms and strong legs, and he was able to swim across the river. It did, however, take him about two hours, and he almost drowned a couple of times.

Seeing this, the lieutenant prayed to God, saying, "Please God, give me the strength and the tools to cross this river." Poof! God gave him a rowboat. He was able to row across the river in about an hour, but it was rough, and
he almost capsized the boat a couple of times.

The colonel had seen how things worked out for the other two, so when he prayed to God, he said, "Please God, give me the strength, the tools and the intelligence to cross this river." And poof! God turned him into an NCO. He
looked at the map, hiked upstream a couple of hundred yards, and then walked across the bridge.


homer4
Moderator
Posts: 646
(5/25/01 5:16:22 pm)
| Del Re: CROSSING THE RIVER (another joke for ya)
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No wonder he made Colonel. Hehe!
...and two hard boiled eggs.

TShooters
V.I.P. Member
Posts: 179
(5/26/01 3:09:05 pm)
| Del Old Salt
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Here's a good one:

A salty Navy Chief and a crusty Marine First Sergeant are at a bar
arguing about who had the tougher career.

The marine said, "I did 30 years in Recon. Fought in three wars and a
**** pot of campaigns." "Outta boot camp, I hit the beach at
Okinawa, clawed my way up
that blood-soaked sand, and got a Bronze Star for taking out an enemy
machine gun nest with a grenade." "I got acouple more stripes and
fought in Korea alongside Chesty Puller. Now THERE was a tough
son-of-a-bitch. Anyways, we pushed back the Reds inch by bloody inch
... all the way up to the Chinese border, colder than a witches tit
and always under a barrage of artillery and small arms fire."

"Did three consecutive tours in 'nam. Kee-RIST!! We humped through
the mud and razor grass for 14 hours at a time. Always plagued by
rain, skeeters, snakes and ducking sniper fire the whole way. And how
I remember being under mortar fire every damned night. Hell, And what
about them fire fights? We'd shoot until our arms ached and our guns
was empty, ... then we'd charge the bastards with naked bayonets!"

The old Chief didn't say anything, at first, just looked straight
ahead. He finally sighed, took a long pull at his drink and said,
"Yeah, it figures.............all shore duty."

homer4
Moderator
Posts: 666
(5/27/01 10:38:42 am)
| Del Re: Old Salt
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Hahahahahaha! Ah Me!
...and two hard boiled eggs.