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|09-17-2012, 04:06 PM||#1|
Join Date: Mar 2012
the relationship game
In the world of romance, one single rule applies:
Make the woman happy.
Do something she likes, and you get points.
Do something she dislikes, and points are subtracted.
You don't get any points for doing something she expects...Sorry, that's the way the game is played.
Here's a guide to the point system.
You make the bed (+1)
You make the bed, but forget to add the decorative pillows (0)
You throw the bedspread over rumpled sheets(-1)
You leave the toilet seat up (-5)
You replace the toilet-paper roll when it's empty (0)
When the toilet-paper roll is barren, you resort to Kleenex (-1)
When the Kleenex runs out you shuffle slowly to the next bathroom (-2)
You go out to buy her spring-fresh extra-light panty liners with wings (+5)
But return with beer (-5)
You check out a suspicious noise at night (0)
You check out a suspicious noise and it's nothing (0)
You check out a suspicious noise and it's something (+5)
You pummel it with a six iron (+10)
It's her father (-20)
You stay by her side the entire party (0)
You stay by her side for a while, then leave to chat with a college buddy (-2)
Named Tiffany (-4)
Who is a dancer (-6)
And was Homecoming Queen (- 20
You take her out to dinner (0)
You take her out to dinner and it's not a sports bar (+1)
Okay, it is a sports bar (-2)
And it's all-you-can-eat night (-3)
It's a sports bar, it's all-you-can-eat night, and your face is painted the colors of your favorite team (-10)
A Night Out with The Boys
Go out with a pal (-5)
And the pal is happily married (-4)
Or frighteningly single (-7)
And he drives a Lotus (-10)
A Night Out
You take her to a movie (+2)
You take her to a movie she likes (+4)
You take her to a movie you hate (+6)
You take her to a movie you like (-2)
It's called DeathCop3 (-3))
You lied and said it was a foreign film about orphans (-15)
You develop a noticeable potbelly (-15)
You develop a noticeable potbelly and exercise to get rid of it (+10)
You develop a noticeable potbelly and resort to loose jeans and baggy Hawaiian shirts (-30)
You say "I don't care because you have one too" (-800)
The Big Question
She asks, "Do I look fat?" (-5)
You hesitate in responding (-10)
You reply, "Where?" (-35)
When she wants to talk about a problem, you listen, displaying what looks like a concerned expression (0)
When she wants to talk, you listen, for over 30 minutes (+5)
You listen for more than 30 minutes without looking at the TV (+10)
She realizes this is because you've fallen asleep (-20)
"If voting could change anything for the better, it'd be illegal." -Unknown
"If good intentions were horses, politicians would own glue factories" -Jeremiah Thompson
Alcohol, Tobacco, Firearms, & Explosives should be the name of a convenience store, not a government agency.
Last edited by Jerryboy; 09-17-2012 at 04:09 PM..
|09-17-2012, 04:22 PM||#2|
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: New Port Richey, Fl.
Re: the relationship game
I'm stumped, I admit it!
I'm still trying to figure out the differences between:
A Sensitive, New- Age Guy and a wimp,
And an arrogant, muscle-bound goon and a stud...
|09-19-2012, 02:25 PM||#3|
Advanced Senior Member
Join Date: Nov 2011
Re: the relationship game
so far my best running total is +8. at times it dips deep into the double digit negatives
I'll go defenseless when our leaders do the same