Introducing Wife to Concealed Cary

[TotheTop83]

Hey guys, hoping you can help me out with this. I'm sure I'm not the only one mulling this around right now.

Given these recent shootings, I've become more and more concerned about my wife's safety. Especially this most recent one where we have learned that apparently nothing is off limits to these people. One of the shootings in the past year even happened in her company, but at a different site. I'd really like her to be able to at least have a fighting chance in some of these situations.

My wife has no problems with firearms in theory and doesn't blink an eye when I'm cleaning my Ruger in front of the TV. Our spare bedroom is even my reloading man-cave. However, she seems to be intimidated by guns in practice and hates the recoil, even of a P95, which absorbs recoil fairly well. (She's a recovering New Yorker, so she didn't grow up with them.) In other words, despite the protection it might afford her, she just doesn't feel comfortable handling and "being in charge" of a gun. I've tried to be as gentle as possible while also trying to nudge her towards it.

How would you guys go about fixing this problem? I'm thinking bringing her to the range on a day that's reasonably quiet and just having her shoot some 22 LR. She loves the look of those SA Rugers. After that just sort of let her decide what type/caliber of firearm to carry?

Maybe I started too high with the 9mm? It was Speer Lawman, which is reasonably hot 9mm ammo so maybe that was it.

I don't want to force my opinion on my wife but I certainly would rather not have something happen to her and wonder if I could have done something to prevent it.

Any help would be greatly appreciated guys.

[carver]

I think you are doing it right. Take her to the range, start her off with the .22's. Work up from there. Let her decide when to move up, and be sure to let her decide on the gun she wants for herself.

[norahc]

Originally Posted by carver

I think you are doing it right. Take her to the range, start her off with the .22's. Work up from there. Let her decide when to move up, and be sure to let her decide on the gun she wants for herself.

Agreed, and be sure to introduce her to various calibers. If all she is willing to handle is a .25 or a .380, then so be it. While I consider the 9mm to be the minimum caliber for a primary defensive weapon, it does no good if she leaves it at home because she doesn't like or can't handle the recoil.

I'm actually going through the same process with my mother right now. Got her started on the .22LR, and worked her up to a 9mm. Next week, she's going to apply for her CHL. Today, we're going shopping for a concealed carry gun for her.

The important things are let her decide the caliber and weapon, and don't rush through the process.

[25yretcoastie]

Like anything new comfort is the most important. Let her get with what ever she is comfortable with and work up from there. Even a .22 is better than nothing!

[1LoneWolf75]

On pistols my wife started with the .22 derringer. She shot bout 20 rounds through it. Then later she got to shoot a ruger mark II. She told me to buy her one of those. I am gonna gradually work her up from there (although I will buy a mark). Think back I'm pretty sure yer first one wasn't a 9, probably a .22. Use it till she gets comforatable then step her up. Although if I had to chose between a .22LR or a .25, I'd take the .22 for the carry.

[TotheTop83]

Thanks guys, I think I'll go the 22 route and let her decide when and if to move up.

Yeah I know the 9 isn't ideal for a first gun and my first one was a 22. My mistake was letting her have a crack at it before working up. She just seemed shocked by it.

22 it is and we'll see where it goes from there.

Thanks again

[76Highboy]

Originally Posted by TotheTop83

Thanks guys, I think I'll go the 22 route and let her decide when and if to move up.

Yeah I know the 9 isn't ideal for a first gun and my first one was a 22. My mistake was letting her have a crack at it before working up. She just seemed shocked by it.

22 it is and we'll see where it goes from there.

Thanks again

The .22 is a great idea. What I did with my wife is got her a Ruger Single Six. Then once she was comfortable with that I got her a Smith and Wesson Lady Smith. Once she had the Lady Smith in her hand she was hooked. She loves her revolver and I load her light 38 special's so it doesn't kick much and then she packs Hornady Critical Defence for CCW. She feels safe with that gun.

[whirley]

Even a .22 can be a defensive weapon loaded with H.P's. That's what my wife carries. At close range it will change anyone's mind, especially if she aims low about the water line. Most vests don't cover that area. If a .22 is all she's comfortable with, then help her get lots of practice. Just point and shoot. paying attention to the front sight, not worrying about a target sight picture. Just thinking about getting shot there makes my eyes water! Ten yards is a good distance to practice.

[TotheTop83]

Originally Posted by whirley

Even a .22 can be a defensive weapon loaded with H.P's. That's what my wife carries. At close range it will change anyone's mind, especially if she aims low about the water line. Most vests don't cover that area. If a .22 is all she's comfortable with, then help her get lots of practice. Just point and shoot. paying attention to the front sight, not worrying about a target sight picture. Just thinking about getting shot there makes my eyes water! Ten yards is a good distance to practice.

lol, never thought of that technique. I agree. A pellet gun aimed there would change my behavior pretty quickly.

BTW, she loves the single six. Just something about those "cowboy guns" she says.

[aa1911]

I can't get my wife to carry or shoot really, wish she would. She's not uncomfortable around guns but doesn't see the need to wear one. She's got a 642 in .357, a stoeger coach gun in 12g and I bought her a .22 AR that's tricked out for shooting at coyotes when I'm not around. (coyotes get the royal treatment of firearms if i'm home, used to shoot 12g at them but now they get 7.62!)

I try and keep everything locked up minus a couple handguns when I'm gone, don't want some whacko to break in while she's out back and find a gun to use. But she's pulled our 'door greeter' out a few times on folks who get a little too close for comfort that come up to our door. the GP100 'door greeter' stays loaded and hidden at all times.

She understands why I never get out of arms reach from my guns, furthest away they ever get is when I'm in the shower or on an airplane. I hope you can encourage her to shoot and practice often!

[aa1911]

Maybe a NAA Mini-master or something like that? A small .22 LR revolver would be a pretty good place to start. Small and fits easily in your pocket, I forget my PUG .22 mag is always in my cargo pocket, it's so tiny.

[lilmule]

Taurus pt22 after break in period its sweet and becomes a backup after moving up,small hides easily tip up barrel.Hair over 200 bucks.
I dont carry spare mags just spare pistols not much bigger than a mag.
Rohm 22 revolver carry 5 in it
Pt22 cocked n locked
Llama 32 acp
Pa63 9x18
some combo thereof depending upon weather and clothing,22 always on weak side,pocket or cross draw,primary either a shoulder rig or iwb sob-handle out
Im 132 pds many women are of same size frame or larger even,can shoot a 45 just cant hide one,or one small enough to hide I cannot shoot

[BETH]

another fellow new yorker here, if she tried .22lr she would love it i love my walther p22 fits like a glove not heavy and i can hit a bullseye with it and she could use it as a defensive weapon

[barmstrong2]

Your timing couldn't be better. With Christmas just days away, enroll her in a CCW course. Enroll both of you and go with her! Tell her just like you said it here... you want her to be prepared in the event she ever needs it, and pray she doesn't.

[Palmetto]

I got my wife a Sig Sauer P238, it has virtually no recoil and is small enough to fit in a purse or thigh holster. My wife has taken to shooting like a duck to water. She bought a .357 Magnum that she loves to shoot .38 special with. She also loves the Ruger Mark 3 .22 caliber pistol.

[IShootBack]

I am headed down this road as well. Have taken the wife shooting a couple times in 20 years but she's not interrested, till recently.

Have been out looking and holding at a gun shop to no avail.

A friend is an NRA instructor at a local shop/range and has around 15 years experience training in handgun use. This shop offers beginner classes. For $85 each I am taking my wife and daughter for an indoor range day. They will learn safety and shooting techniques from an NRA instructor. About half of the time is classroom and the remainder is hands on range time. They will get to handle and fire a wide variety of pistols and revolvers to see what they are comfortable with.

[Recon 173]

As an instructor, I've found that most women do well with 4 or 6 inch revolvers. Smaller guns kick hard for the smaller hands of most women. The medium and longer barrels of like a .32 caliber or .357 magnum revolvers (loaded with .38 special ammo) seem to serve them well.

A good Bersa pistol in .32 and .380 caliber for semi-automatic pistols also serve most women well. But for some reason, snub nosed revolvers in .38/.357 magnum just don't work right for most of them.

Also make sure that they can properly grip their pistol of choice. Large grips or oversize grips don't allow them to comfortably nor safely hold their pistols. The best grips I've seen work for most women were thin soft rubber grips. Once you get the right package with the woman shooter, watch out! Some of those ladies can become quite deadly once they have everything in place for their defensive needs.

[DesertRose]

For the past 30 years, I have carried a Charter Arms .44 Spl "Bulldog". But I am used to firing large caliber pistols. My husband believed a woman can fire as large a caliber as a man...and taught me shooting skills beginning with .44 BP Colt New Army revolvers. His viewpoint was a .32 would only make the perp mad.

38 spl. and .357 have a tremendous report and recoil. At least, this is what I found firing them. My Charter Arms is very controllable even with the 240 grain bullets. At one time, that was all you could get. Now you can find 200 grain hollowpoints. I replaced its smaller wood grips were replaced with the Packmeyer's. These were flatter and offered a place for my "pinky". Being a five shot, it is easy enough to wear concealed and not that heavy whether in a purse or inside the pants carry or even in a jeans' front pocket (if you are wearing a set with deep ones.)

Now, I am talking about an early version. But imagine the new ones are similar.

My occasional "alternative" concealed carry is a 380 semi auto Makarov.

[gun runner]

i agree with starting her out with the .22 but i would certainly get her used to a bigger caliber like a 9mm,45, or 357mag etc.

dont underestimate rimfires though. they will work for defense but id still choose a larger caliber for her protection