A man and his monkey...

glocknut · 10-15-2006, 02:58 PM

A guy walks into a bar with his pet monkey He orders a drink and, while he's drinking, the monkey jumps all around the place. The monkey grabs some olives off the bar and eats them, then grabs some sliced limes and eats them, then jumps onto the pool table, grabs one of the billiard balls, sticks it in his mouth, and to everyone's amazement, somehow he swallows it whole.

The bartender screams at the guy, "Did you see what your monkey just did?" The guy says "No, what?" "He just ate the cue ball off my pool table...Whole!"

"Yeah, that doesn't surprise me," replied the guy, "he eats everything in sight, the little pig. Sorry. I'll pay for the cue ball and stuff." He finishes his drink, pays his bill, pays for the stuff the monkey ate, then leaves.

Two weeks later he's in the bar again, and has his monkey with him. He orders a drink and the monkey starts running around the bar again. While the man is finishing his drink, the monkey finds a maraschino cherry on the bar. He grabs it, sticks it up his butt, pulls it out, and eats it. Then the monkey finds a peanut, and again sticks it up his butt, pulls it out, and eats it.

The bartender is disgusted. "Did you see what your monkey did now?" he asks. "No, what?" replies the guy. "Well, he stuck a maraschino cherry and a peanut up his butt, pulled 'em out, and ate 'em!" said the bartender.

"Yeah, that doesn't surprise me," replied the guy. "He still eats everything in sight but, ever since he had to pass that cue ball, he measures everything first."

Marlin · 10-15-2006, 03:36 PM

G R O A N ! ! ! !

glocknut · 10-15-2006, 03:49 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Marlin

G R O A N ! ! ! !

HEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHE

gn

southernshooter · 10-15-2006, 11:17 PM

That's bad

Bruce FLinch · 10-15-2006, 11:37 PM

ROTHFLMAO

.22guy · 10-16-2006, 12:17 AM

Smart monkey!

Crpdeth · 10-16-2006, 12:46 AM

Bwaaahahahahaha!

inplanotx · 10-16-2006, 10:08 AM

10-15-2006, 02:58 PM	#1
glocknut Advanced Senior Member Join Date: Dec 2003 Location: THE FORUM MASCOTT... Posts: 12,482	A man and his monkey... A guy walks into a bar with his pet monkey He orders a drink and, while he's drinking, the monkey jumps all around the place. The monkey grabs some olives off the bar and eats them, then grabs some sliced limes and eats them, then jumps onto the pool table, grabs one of the billiard balls, sticks it in his mouth, and to everyone's amazement, somehow he swallows it whole. The bartender screams at the guy, "Did you see what your monkey just did?" The guy says "No, what?" "He just ate the cue ball off my pool table...Whole!" "Yeah, that doesn't surprise me," replied the guy, "he eats everything in sight, the little pig. Sorry. I'll pay for the cue ball and stuff." He finishes his drink, pays his bill, pays for the stuff the monkey ate, then leaves. Two weeks later he's in the bar again, and has his monkey with him. He orders a drink and the monkey starts running around the bar again. While the man is finishing his drink, the monkey finds a maraschino cherry on the bar. He grabs it, sticks it up his butt, pulls it out, and eats it. Then the monkey finds a peanut, and again sticks it up his butt, pulls it out, and eats it. The bartender is disgusted. "Did you see what your monkey did now?" he asks. "No, what?" replies the guy. "Well, he stuck a maraschino cherry and a peanut up his butt, pulled 'em out, and ate 'em!" said the bartender. "Yeah, that doesn't surprise me," replied the guy. "He still eats everything in sight but, ever since he had to pass that cue ball, he measures everything first." -->

10-15-2006, 03:36 PM	#2
Marlin TFF Admin Staff Chief Counselor Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: At SouthernMoss' side forever! Contributor Posts: 13,854	Re: A man and his monkey... *G R O A N ! ! ! !* __________________ *The flag represents a living country and is itself considered a living thing.* *The only criminal class native to the United States is Congress.*

10-15-2006, 11:17 PM	#4
southernshooter Advanced Senior Member Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: Deep South Mississippi Posts: 5,943	Re: A man and his monkey... That's bad __________________ Only you can see this

10-15-2006, 11:37 PM	#5
Bruce FLinch Advanced Senior Member Join Date: Aug 2005 Location: Bay Point, Kali..aka Gun Point Posts: 5,016	Re: A man and his monkey... ROTHFLMAO __________________ A bad day @ the Range, is better than a good day @ work.

10-16-2006, 12:17 AM	#6
.22guy Member Join Date: Oct 2006 Location: Bakersfield, CA Posts: 13	Re: A man and his monkey... Smart monkey!

10-16-2006, 12:46 AM	#7
Crpdeth Advanced Senior Member Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: Location: Location Contributor Posts: 8,247	Re: A man and his monkey... Bwaaahahahahaha! __________________ Our greatest pretenses are built up not to hide the evil and the ugly in us, but our emptiness. The hardest thing to hide is something that is not there. ~Eric Hoffer

10-16-2006, 10:08 AM	#8
inplanotx Advanced Senior Member Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: Texas Posts: 8,897	Re: A man and his monkey... __________________