The $2.00 Bill

[22WRF]

On my way home from work, I stopped at Taco Bell for a quick bite to eat.
In my billfold are a $50 bill and a $2 bill.
I figure that with a $2 bill, I can get something to eat and not have to worry about anyone getting irritated at me for trying to break a $50 bill.

Me:
"Hi, I'd like one seven-layer burrito please, to go "

Server:
"That'll be $1.04. Eat in?"

Me:
"No, it's to go." At this point, I open my billfold and hand him the $2 bill. He looks at it kind of funny.

Server:
"Uh, hang on a sec, I'll be right back."

He goes to talk to his manager, who is still within my earshot.
The following conversation occurs between the two of them:

Server:
"Hey, you ever see a $2 bill?"

Manager:
"No. A what?"

Server:
"A $2 bill. This guy just gave it to me."

Manager:
"Ask for something else. There's no such thing as a $2 bill."

Server:
"Yeah, thought so."

He comes back to me and says, "We don't take these. Do you have anything else?"

Me:
"Just this fifty. You don't take $2 bills? Why?"

Server:
"I don't know."

Me:
"See here where it says legal tender?"

Server:
"Yeah."

Me:
"So, why won't you take it?"

Server:
"Well, hang on a sec."

He goes back to his manager, who has been watching me like I'm a shoplifter, and says to him, "He says I have to take it."

Manager:
"Doesn't he have anything else?"

Server:
"Yeah, a fifty. I'll get it and you can open the safe and get change "

Manager:
"I'm not opening the safe with him in here."

Server:
"What should I do?"

Manager:
"Tell him to come back later when he has real money."

Server:
"I can't tell him that! You tell him."

Manager:
"Just tell him."

Server:
"No way! This is weird. I'm going in back."

The manager approaches me and says, "I'm sorry, but we don't take big bills this time of night."

Me:
"It's only seven o'clock! Well then, here's a two dollar bill."

Manager:
"We don't take those, either."

Me:
"Why not?"

Manager:
"I think you know why."

Me:
"No really, tell me why."

Manager:
"Please leave before I call mall security."

Me:
"Excuse me?"

Manager:
"Please leave before I call mall security."

Me:
"What on earth for?"

Manager:
"Please, sir."

Me:
"Uh, go ahead, call them."

Manager:
"Would you please just leave?"

Me:
"No."

Manager:
"Fine -- have it your way then."

Me:
"Hey, that's Burger King, isn't it?"

At this point, he backs away from me and calls mall security on the phone around the corner. I have two people staring at me from the dining area, and I begin laughing out loud, just for effect. A few minutes later this 45-year-oldish guy comes in.

Guard:
"Yeah, Mike, what's up?"

Manager (whispering):
"This guy is trying to give me some (pause) funny money."

Guard:
"No kidding! What?"

Manager:
"Get this -- A two dollar bill."

Guard (incredulous): "Why would a guy fake a two dollar bill?"

Manager:
"I don't know. He's kinda weird. He says the only other thing he has is a fifty."

Guard:
"Oh, so the fifty's fake!"

Manager:
"No, the two dollar bill is."

Guard:
"Why would he fake a two dollar bill?"

Manager:
"I don't know! Can you talk to him, and get him out of here?"

Guard:
"Yeah."

Security Guard walks over to me and......

Guard:
"Mike here tells me you have some fake bills you're trying to use."

Me:
"Uh, no."

Guard:
"Lemme see 'em."

Me:
"Why?"

Guard:
"Do you want me to get the cops in here?"

At this point I am ready to say, "Sure, please!" but I want to eat, so I say "I'm just trying to buy a burrito and pay for it with this two dollar bill.

I put the bill up near his face, and he flinches like I'm taking a swing at him. He takes the bill, turns it over a few times in his hands, and says, "Hey, Mike, what's wrong with this bill?"

Manager:
"It's fake."

Guard:
"It doesn't look fake to me."

Manager:
"But it's a two dollar bill."

Guard:
"Yeah?"

Manager:
"Well, there's no such thing, is there?"

The security guard and I both look at him like he's an idiot, and it dawns on the guy that he has no clue.

So, it turns out that my burrito was free, and he threw in a small drink and some of those cinnamon thingies, too.

Made me want to get a whole stack of two dollar bills just to see what happens when I try to buy stuff. If I got the right group of people, I could probably end up in jail. You get free food there, too.

[Marlin T]

1995 or 1976 was a long time ago huh?

[Nighthawk]

[southernshooter]

[Deputy Dawg]

This was a joke, right.

[22WRF]

This was a joke, right.

Just take a $2 in to your local fast food joint and give it try.

Those are the places with pictures on th e register keys instead of numbers

[Crpdeth]

Originally Posted by Deputy Dawg

This was a joke, right.

NEVER under estimate the ignorance of fast food restaurant employes


Crpdeth

[gunfreakboy]

It doesn't surprise me.

[glocknut]

This is my 2 cents worth...

Americans expect cheap, fast, fresh food for the price of pocket change. An example would be McDonalds Double cheeseburger for $1.00. We seem to think that we should be able to get it this cheap even though the owners of these franchises pay upwards of a quarter of a million dollars to get their franchise rights. Then they're stuck buying the supplies for these franchises from the approved "mandated" suppliers and often get jabbed into buying sh*t they don't need to keep in compliance with the franchise contract. And since they're getting squeezed from two directions already...they are forced to hire morons to run their resteraunts because not only is it all they can afford, but its the only "type" of people who lack enough self respect to work for them in the first place....

Those of you that think you should be served a five star burger by a highly educated person for pennies...all i can say is GET REAL !!!!!
H*ll, i'm happy if they at least refrain from spitting on the darn thing... sheesh.

mike
gn

[Lead Lobber]

I love your story, 22WRF, it's better than "Who's on First?" In California, one can walk into most fast food outlets and ask for milk with their order, only to be stared at as if one had just stepped off a UFO. I wish I knew more Spanish, but "milk" to a Spanish speaker with sub par English skills is not understood.

At which point I grab the nearest women and jiggle one of her breasts, while mooing. Just kidding I do that a lot here, you know

LL

[henry0reilly]

Several other stories about "funny money"

http://www.snopes.com/business/info/tacobell.asp

[Goody]

About 15 years ago I went to the bank to make a deposit and purchase change for the store. After the teller counted the deposit, I gave her my change order, which she filled from her drawer. After she put the rolls of change on the counter and I was counting them I noticed something funny in 1 roll of nickles. These were the clear plastic rolls, and I pointed out that something wasn't right as one of the coins was a different color. She opened the roll and we looked at what turned out to be a $5 gold coin from around 1905, IIRC. She puts it back in her drawer and gives me another roll of nickles. I ask what she was gonna do with it, she says turn it in at the end of my shift. I ask how much did she want for it, she says as far as her drawer was concerned it was worth .05. I hand her a nickle and she gives me the coin. Gold was about $360 per oz at the time. I stopped at a coin shop on the way home and sold it for $90, a cool $89.95 profit on a nickle investment! I was happy and so was she, I guess.

[Pistolenschutze]

Sheesh, a $2.00 bill? I haven't seen one of those in years! Quick! Tear off the corner so it won't be unlucky!

My son, who was in the Navy in the late 80s and early 90s, told me of an interesting experience he had with $2.00 bills. He was attending his "B" school for electronics in Chicago at the time. It seems there had been an increasing number of complaints registered with the Navy from the neighborhood surrounding the base where he was stationed. Most concerned the alleged "rowdyness" of the sailors when off base. There were calls from some merchants and townsfolk for the Navy to close the base and get out of Chicago. The commander of the base decided on a rather neat countermeasure. On payday, he ordered that all sailors be paid in the very uncommon $2.00 bills. It didn't take long for the merchants in the area to realize just how much the base was contributing to their own economic well being. Needless to say, the complaints ceased!

[armedandsafe]

Every time I cash a paycheck, I always ask "Sues, Twos or Sacs?" I buy $100 of whatever they have and use them for lunches, tips and "goodkids." Right now I'm sitting here with 2 Susan B Anthoney coins, 28 Sacajewa coins and a bunch of twos.

Nellis AFB paid in two dollar bills twice a year during the Korean wa...conf...shootemup.

Pops

[rosierita]

i have a stack of $2 that i havent spent yet, for that very reason...

[durk]

I love these stories.

[Marlin]

I've been known to carry several Twos in my pocket just to be able to challenge folks that won't take "LEGAL TENDER". The same is two of the dollar coins......

The fact of the matter is that they are LEGALLY OBLIGATED to take legal tender.

There have been some pretty nice discussions over the years !!!!!

[Pistolenschutze]

Originally Posted by Marlin

There have been some pretty nice discussions over the years !!!!!

Especially with an attorney on one end of the conversation! Hmmmm, does that work with Confederate money too, Marlin?

[Crpdeth]

I had a cousin (now on death row) who used to buy bent coins at a flea market, I have no idea where the seller got them, but he had a cast iron stew pot full of deformed coins.

It was always comical to see my cousin mingle a mangled 25 cent piece in with the rest of his payment for a pack of smokes and see if the casher would bother to say anything.

When the casher would object, his favorite come back was "Well I accepted it!!!"....LOL, yeah for about half price!


Crpdeth

[pickenup]

Makes me want to run out and get a pad of $2 bills.
Don't they make them in a "pad" like stickies now?
Just tear off a couple.......right?

[Brob73]

oh I'm Inspired now!! I gotta get me crap load of $2 bills!!
I'm gonna have me some fun!!! nothin' funner than making these fast food & conveinient store "genius's" feel even "smarter"!! hehe...


That was great 22WRF!!

[john fox]

Funny story!

[Popgunner]

Glocknut

I wouldn't be too worried about McDonalds profit margins. I do sign work for most of the local McDonalds & one of the owners who I've known for about 30 years was talking with one of his store managers when the "Big Deluxe" burger was being offered. Tney were trying to decide what price to put on the burger & they were adding up their cost for materials with the bun, patty, catchup, pickle etc. & it came up to 12 cents. The owner told the manager to set the price as long as it was over $2. I know they have overhead but dang, they must be makin' something here & there.

Loved the story

[glocknut]

Originally Posted by Popgunner

Glocknut

I wouldn't be too worried about McDonalds profit margins. I do sign work for most of the local McDonalds & one of the owners who I've known for about 30 years was talking with one of his store managers when the "Big Deluxe" burger was being offered. Tney were trying to decide what price to put on the burger & they were adding up their cost for materials with the bun, patty, catchup, pickle etc. & it came up to 12 cents. The owner told the manager to set the price as long as it was over $2. I know they have overhead but dang, they must be makin' something here & there.

Loved the story

Might have something to do with all that sawdust in the beef patties....i just didn't know it was that much in there?
Materials maybe, but not labor... i would bet on that!!!! Workers comp insurance is high these days.

mike
gn

[xxxxxxl]

I had a professor in college that said if a merchant refuses to accept legal tender then whatever is on the counter is free. I don't know if I would be willing to test the outcome.