The laughs on Hillary. - The Firearms Forum

Bruce FLinch · 06-08-2007, 07:41 PM

Even If you did like Hillary...These would still be FUNNY!

Hillary Clinton said that her childhood dream was to be an
Olympic athlete. But she was not athletic enough. She said she
wanted to be an astronaut, but at the time they didn't take women. She said
she wanted to go into medicine, but hospitals made her woozy. Should
she be telling people this story? Â I mean she's basically saying she
wants to be president because she can't do anything else."
Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â --Jay Leno

"Well, the big story -- Hillary Clinton will be running for
president in 2008. You know why I think she's running? I think she
finally wants to see what it's like to sleep in the president's bed."
Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â --Jay Leno

"Top Democrats have mixed feelings about Sen. Hillary
Clinton running for president. Apparently, some Democrats don't like
the idea, while others hate it."
Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â --Conan O'Brien

"In a fiery speech this weekend, Hillary Clinton wondered
why President Bush can't find the tallest man in Afghanistan.
Probably for the same reason she couldn't find the fattest intern
under the desk."
Â Â Â Â Â Â Â --Jay Leno

"Former President Bill Clinton said that if his wife,
Hillary, is elected president, he will do whatever she wants. You know
Bill Clinton -- when he makes a vow to Hillary, you can take that to the
bank."
Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â -Jay Leno

Â "Did you know Bill and Hillary Clinton were born under the
same sign? Know what sign? 'For Sale.'"
Â Â Â Â Â Â Â -Jay Leno

"A student from the University of Washington has sold his
soul on eBay for $400. He's a law student, so he probably doesn't need
it, but still, that's not very much. Today, Hillary Clinton said,
'Hey, at least I got some furniture and a Senate seat for mine."
Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â --Jay Leno

"Hillary Clinton said today that she wants legislation to
allow all ex-felons to vote. See, this way all the
Clinton's former business partners can vote for her in 2008."
Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â --Jay Leno

"Hillary Clinton's 506-page memoirs have come out. So much
of her personality shines through, that in the end, you, too, will
want to sleep with an intern."
Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â - Craig Kilborn

In Hillary Clinton's new book 'Living History,'
Hillary details what it was like meeting Bill Clinton, falling in love
with him, getting married, and living a passionate, wonderful life as
husband and wife. Then on page two, the trouble starts."
Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â - Jay Leno

"In the book, she says when Bill told her he was having an
affair, she said 'I could hardly breathe, I was gulping for
air.'
No, I'm sorry, that's what Monica said."
Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â - David Letterman

"Hillary Clinton, our junior senator from New York,
announced that she has no intentions of ever, ever running for office
of the President of the United States. Her husband, Bill Clinton, is bitterly
disappointed. He is crushed. There go his dreams of becoming a
two-impeachment family."
Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â - David Letterman

"Last night, Senator Hillary Clinton hosted her first party
in her new home in Washington. People said it was a lot like the
parties she used to host at the White House. In fact, even the
furniture was the same."
Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â - Jay Leno

"Senator Hillary Clinton is attacking President Bush for
breaking his campaign promise to cut carbon dioxide emissions, saying
a promise made, a promise broken. And then out of habit, she demanded
that Bush spend the night on the couch."
Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â - Craig Kilborn

"CNN found that Hillary Clinton is the most admired woman
in America. Women admire her because she's strong and successful.
Men admire her because she allows her husband to cheat and get away with
it."
Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â - Jay Leno

"Hillary Clinton is the junior senator from the great state
of New York. When they swore her in, she used the Clinton family
Bible. . . the one with only seven commandments."
-David Letterman

dcd_enterprises · 01-13-2008, 12:03 AM

Good Bruce. Very Good.

AL MOUNT · 01-13-2008, 09:41 AM

Too funny dude......

I hadn't heard most of em....

catfish83861 · 01-13-2008, 01:48 PM

I think it would be even funnier if most of them were not so dang true.

catfish

Marlin · 01-13-2008, 02:13 PM

Ditto Catfish !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

durk · 01-13-2008, 02:32 PM

Nighthawk · 01-13-2008, 08:32 PM

Pistolenschutze · 01-14-2008, 01:06 AM

Good one, Bruce!

06-08-2007, 07:41 PM	#1
Bruce FLinch Advanced Senior Member Join Date: Aug 2005 Location: Bay Point, Kali..aka Gun Point Posts: 5,016	The laughs on Hillary. Even If you did like Hillary...These would still be FUNNY! Hillary Clinton said that her childhood dream was to be an Olympic athlete. But she was not athletic enough. She said she wanted to be an astronaut, but at the time they didn't take women. She said she wanted to go into medicine, but hospitals made her woozy. Should she be telling people this story? Â I mean she's basically saying she wants to be president because she can't do anything else." Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â --Jay Leno "Well, the big story -- Hillary Clinton will be running for president in 2008. You know why I think she's running? I think she finally wants to see what it's like to sleep in the president's bed." Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â --Jay Leno "Top Democrats have mixed feelings about Sen. Hillary Clinton running for president. Apparently, some Democrats don't like the idea, while others hate it." Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â --Conan O'Brien "In a fiery speech this weekend, Hillary Clinton wondered why President Bush can't find the tallest man in Afghanistan. Probably for the same reason she couldn't find the fattest intern under the desk." Â Â Â Â Â Â Â --Jay Leno "Former President Bill Clinton said that if his wife, Hillary, is elected president, he will do whatever she wants. You know Bill Clinton -- when he makes a vow to Hillary, you can take that to the bank." Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â -Jay Leno Â "Did you know Bill and Hillary Clinton were born under the same sign? Know what sign? 'For Sale.'" Â Â Â Â Â Â Â -Jay Leno "A student from the University of Washington has sold his soul on eBay for $400. He's a law student, so he probably doesn't need it, but still, that's not very much. Today, Hillary Clinton said, 'Hey, at least I got some furniture and a Senate seat for mine." Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â --Jay Leno "Hillary Clinton said today that she wants legislation to allow all ex-felons to vote. See, this way all the Clinton's former business partners can vote for her in 2008." Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â --Jay Leno "Hillary Clinton's 506-page memoirs have come out. So much of her personality shines through, that in the end, you, too, will want to sleep with an intern." Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â - Craig Kilborn In Hillary Clinton's new book 'Living History,' Hillary details what it was like meeting Bill Clinton, falling in love with him, getting married, and living a passionate, wonderful life as husband and wife. Then on page two, the trouble starts." Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â - Jay Leno "In the book, she says when Bill told her he was having an affair, she said 'I could hardly breathe, I was gulping for air.' No, I'm sorry, that's what Monica said." Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â - David Letterman "Hillary Clinton, our junior senator from New York, announced that she has no intentions of ever, ever running for office of the President of the United States. Her husband, Bill Clinton, is bitterly disappointed. He is crushed. There go his dreams of becoming a two-impeachment family." Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â - David Letterman "Last night, Senator Hillary Clinton hosted her first party in her new home in Washington. People said it was a lot like the parties she used to host at the White House. In fact, even the furniture was the same." Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â - Jay Leno "Senator Hillary Clinton is attacking President Bush for breaking his campaign promise to cut carbon dioxide emissions, saying a promise made, a promise broken. And then out of habit, she demanded that Bush spend the night on the couch." Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â - Craig Kilborn "CNN found that Hillary Clinton is the most admired woman in America. Women admire her because she's strong and successful. Men admire her because she allows her husband to cheat and get away with it." Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â - Jay Leno "Hillary Clinton is the junior senator from the great state of New York. When they swore her in, she used the Clinton family Bible. . . the one with only seven commandments." -David Letterman __________________ A bad day @ the Range, is better than a good day @ work. -->

01-13-2008, 12:03 AM	#2
dcd_enterprises Advanced Senior Member Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: Wheatland, Iowa Posts: 1,313	Re: The laughs on Hillary. Good Bruce. Very Good. __________________ A veteran - whether active duty, retired, National Guard or Reserve - is someone who, at one point in his or her life, wrote a blank check made payable to "The United States of America" for an amount of "up to and including my life." That is honor, and there are way too many people in this country who no longer understand that - Author unknown

01-13-2008, 09:41 AM	#3
AL MOUNT Advanced Senior Member Join Date: Oct 2006 Location: Cleaning my Thompson in The Foothills of the Ozark Mountains Posts: 3,134	Re: The laughs on Hillary. Too funny dude...... I hadn't heard most of em.... __________________ 501st Parachute Infantry Regiment 101st Airborne Division Vietnam 67-68

01-13-2008, 01:48 PM	#4
catfish83861 Advanced Senior Member Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: North Idaho Posts: 2,019	Re: The laughs on Hillary. I think it would be even funnier if most of them were not so dang true. catfish __________________ 'Bravery is being the only one who knows you're afraid.' - David Hackworth

01-13-2008, 02:13 PM	#5
Marlin TFF Admin Staff Chief Counselor Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: At SouthernMoss' side forever! Contributor Posts: 13,854	Re: The laughs on Hillary. Ditto Catfish !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! __________________ *The flag represents a living country and is itself considered a living thing.* *The only criminal class native to the United States is Congress.*

01-13-2008, 02:32 PM	#6
durk Advanced Senior Member Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: Oklahoma Posts: 2,026	Re: The laughs on Hillary. __________________ Durk

01-13-2008, 08:32 PM	#7
Nighthawk Advanced Senior Member Join Date: Aug 2006 Location: South Central Texas Posts: 3,330	Re: The laughs on Hillary. __________________ Our obligations to our country never cease but with our lives." --John Adams, letter to Benjamin Rush, April 18, 1808 NRA Life TSRA Life GOA Member

01-14-2008, 01:06 AM	#8
Pistolenschutze Advanced Senior Member Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: Colorado Posts: 13,094	Re: The laughs on Hillary. Good one, Bruce! __________________ --Pistolenschutze (Pistol Shooter)