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Old 01-11-2008, 01:01 PM   #1
Nighthawk
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Location: South Central Texas
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Cool MEN

Question: What is the difference between men and
puppies?
Answer: Puppies grow up.

Question: Why do men always have a stupid look on
their faces?
Answer: Because they are...

Question: What do men have in common with ceramic
tiles?
Answer: Fix them properly once and you can walk
all over them forever.

Question: If you drop a man and a brick out of a
plane, which one
would hit the ground first?
Answer: Who cares?????

Question: What did God say after he created man?
Answer: I can do better than this! And then he
created woman!!!.

Question: What's the difference between an
intelligent man & a UFO?
Answer: I don't know, I've never seen either.

Question: What are two reasons why men don't mind
their own business?
Answer: i) no mind ii) no business

Question: Why did Moses wander in the desert for
40 years?
Answer: Because even back then men wouldn't ask
for directions.

Question: What is the difference between men and
pigs?
Answer: Pigs don't turn into men when they
drink...

Question: What makes men chase women they have no
intention of marrying?

Answer: The same urge that makes dogs chase
vehicles they have no
intention of driving.

Question: What do you do with a man who thinks
he's God's gift?
Answer: Exchange him!!

Question: Why do men like smart women?
Answer: Opposites attract.
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Old 01-11-2008, 02:02 PM   #2
Bruce FLinch
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Default Re: MEN

Nighthawk! You trying to hurt my feelings?
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Old 01-11-2008, 04:11 PM   #3
catfish83861
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Default Re: MEN

Humn, Me thinks you might be tlking about me,oh well its Miller time , Hey honey bring me a beer!
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Old 01-11-2008, 05:06 PM   #4
Pistolenschutze
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Default Re: MEN

Understanding a Woman


We need REALLY MEANS I want

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

You want REALLY MEANS You need

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

It's your decision REALLY MEANS The correct decision should be obvious by now.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

We need to talk REALLY MEANS I need to complain

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Do what you want REALLY MEANS You'll pay for this later.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

You're ... so manly REALLY MEANS You need a shave and you sweat a lot.

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Sure... go ahead REALLY MEANS I don't want you to.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I'm not upset REALLY MEANS Of course I'm upset, you moron!

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

You're certainly attentive tonight. REALLY MEANS Is sex all you ever think about?

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I'm not emotional! And I'm not overreacting! REALLY MEANS I'm on my period.

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Be romantic, turn out the lights. REALLY MEANS I'm Embarrassed

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This kitchen is so inconvenient REALLY MEANS I want a new house.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

You have to learn to communicate. REALLY MEANS Just agree with me.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Yes REALLY MEANS No

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

No REALLY MEANS No

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Maybe REALLY MEANS No

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I heard a noise REALLY MEANS I noticed you were almost asleep.

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Do you love me? REALLY MEANS I'm going to ask for something expensive.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

How much do you love me? REALLY MEANS I did something you're not going to like.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I'll be ready in a minute. REALLY MEANS Be patient I'll be a while.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Am I a little fat? REALLY MEANS Tell me I'm beautiful.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I'm sorry. REALLY MEANS You'll be sorry.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Do you like this recipe? REALLY MEANS It's easy to fix, so get used to it.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Was that the baby? REALLY MEANS Why don't you wake up and deal with the baby.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I'm not yelling! REALLY MEANS Yes I am yelling because I think this is important.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

All we're going to buy is a soap dish REALLY MEANS Major shopping trip. Did you bring your checkbook?
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Old 01-11-2008, 10:05 PM   #5
durk
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Default Re: MEN

We MEANS...... You.

We need to take the Christmas stuff down MEANS... You need to take the Christmas stuff down!
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Old 01-12-2008, 12:33 AM   #6
CampingJosh
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Default Re: MEN

Thank you, Pistol. I have half a dozen weddings to go to this summer; a lot of my friends are getting married. I was almost starting to feel like maybe I should look that way, too.
BUT... your list reminded me of why I want a couple more years of freedom (at least).
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Old 01-12-2008, 08:48 AM   #7
AL MOUNT
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Default Re: MEN

Quote:
Originally Posted by CampingJosh View Post
a lot of my friends are getting married. I was almost starting to feel like maybe I should look that way, too.

Let me give ya a little $$$$$$ saving tip.......



Just find a woman you hate.......... and buy her a house...............
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Old 01-12-2008, 09:28 AM   #8
delta13soultaker
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Default Re: MEN

Quote:
Originally Posted by AL MOUNT View Post
Let me give ya a little $$$$$$ saving tip.......



Just find a woman you hate.......... and buy her a house...............
LMFAO
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Old 01-12-2008, 10:49 AM   #9
Pistolenschutze
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Default Re: MEN

Quote:
Originally Posted by CampingJosh View Post
BUT... your list reminded me of why I want a couple more years of freedom (at least).
Why buy a cow when milk is so cheap? Sorry, I just had to beat Delta to that one.
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Old 01-12-2008, 11:49 AM   #10
delta13soultaker
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Default Re: MEN

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pistolenschutze View Post
Why buy a cow when milk is so cheap? Sorry, I just had to beat Delta to that one.
It is a true thing
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