The snoring Dog... - The Firearms Forum

glocknut · 01-14-2008, 08:04 PM

A couple has a dog that snores. Annoyed because she can't sleep, the wife goes to the vet to see if he can help.

The vet tells the woman to tie a ribbon around the dog's testicles, and he will stop snoring.

"Yeah right!" she says.

A few minutes after going to bed, the dog begins snoring, as usual. The wife tosses and turns, unable to sleep. Muttering to herself, she goes to the closet and grabs a piece of red ribbon and ties it carefully around the dog's testicles. Sure enough, the dog stops snoring. The woman is amazed...

Later that night, her husband returns home drunk from being out drinking with his buddies. He climbs into bed, falls asleep and immediately begins snoring loudly.

The woman decides maybe the ribbon might work on him. So, she goes to the closet again, grabs a piece of blue ribbon and ties it around her husband's testicles.

Amazingly, it also works on him! The woman sleeps soundly.

The husband wakes from his drunken stupor and stumbles into the bathroom. As he stands in front of the toilet, he glances in the mirror and sees a blue ribbon attached to his privates. He is very confused, and as he walks back into the bedroom, he sees the red ribbon attached to his dog's testicles.

He shakes his head and looks at the dog and whispers,

"I don't know where we were ... or what we did ... but, by God .

We took FIRST and SECOND place

TheJakster2 · 01-14-2008, 09:51 PM

LMAO

TOO GOOD

Nighthawk · 01-14-2008, 10:57 PM

CampingJosh · 01-14-2008, 11:49 PM

That's a great one! I will be sharing that one with someone in the morning.

AL MOUNT · 01-15-2008, 09:20 AM

Damn.......

....now ya tell me........Leo the Mastiff snores like a freight train.

But we had him neutered........there's nothing to tie a ribbon on.......

Marlin · 01-15-2008, 09:33 AM

ROTFLMAO !!!!!

inplanotx · 01-15-2008, 04:31 PM

justdoug · 01-15-2008, 10:12 PM

Yeah that's a good one. The original version came in song form with words and music by Mike Cross - The Best of the Funny Stuff - is the album. I recommend this to anybody who enjoys a little bluegrass and a lot of laughs.

Here's a link to his site:

http://www.mikecross.com/discs.asp

They list the song - but it's only a sample.

01-14-2008, 08:04 PM	#1
glocknut Advanced Senior Member Join Date: Dec 2003 Location: THE FORUM MASCOTT... Posts: 12,482	The snoring Dog... A couple has a dog that snores. Annoyed because she can't sleep, the wife goes to the vet to see if he can help. The vet tells the woman to tie a ribbon around the dog's testicles, and he will stop snoring. "Yeah right!" she says. A few minutes after going to bed, the dog begins snoring, as usual. The wife tosses and turns, unable to sleep. Muttering to herself, she goes to the closet and grabs a piece of red ribbon and ties it carefully around the dog's testicles. Sure enough, the dog stops snoring. The woman is amazed... Later that night, her husband returns home drunk from being out drinking with his buddies. He climbs into bed, falls asleep and immediately begins snoring loudly. The woman decides maybe the ribbon might work on him. So, she goes to the closet again, grabs a piece of blue ribbon and ties it around her husband's testicles. Amazingly, it also works on him! The woman sleeps soundly. The husband wakes from his drunken stupor and stumbles into the bathroom. As he stands in front of the toilet, he glances in the mirror and sees a blue ribbon attached to his privates. He is very confused, and as he walks back into the bedroom, he sees the red ribbon attached to his dog's testicles. He shakes his head and looks at the dog and whispers, "I don't know where we were ... or what we did ... but, by God . We took FIRST and SECOND place __________________ Where O where are you tonight? Why have you gone and left me alone? I searched to world over and a thought i found true love... You met another and PTThhh you were gone.... -->

01-14-2008, 09:51 PM	#2
TheJakster2 V.I.P. Member Join Date: May 2007 Location: Florida Posts: 274	Re: The snoring Dog... LMAO TOO GOOD __________________ Take a kid hunting and create a lifelong momory Gun control is being able to hit what you aim at.

01-14-2008, 10:57 PM	#3
Nighthawk Advanced Senior Member Join Date: Aug 2006 Location: South Central Texas Posts: 3,330	Re: The snoring Dog... __________________ Our obligations to our country never cease but with our lives." --John Adams, letter to Benjamin Rush, April 18, 1808 NRA Life TSRA Life GOA Member

01-14-2008, 11:49 PM	#4
CampingJosh TFF Moderator/Host Join Date: Sep 2007 Location: Indiana Contributor Posts: 4,798	Re: The snoring Dog... That's a great one! I will be sharing that one with someone in the morning.

01-15-2008, 09:20 AM	#5
AL MOUNT Advanced Senior Member Join Date: Oct 2006 Location: Cleaning my Thompson in The Foothills of the Ozark Mountains Posts: 3,130	Re: The snoring Dog... Damn...........now ya tell me........Leo the Mastiff snores like a freight train. But we had him neutered........there's nothing to tie a ribbon on....... __________________ 501st Parachute Infantry Regiment 101st Airborne Division Vietnam 67-68

01-15-2008, 09:33 AM	#6
Marlin TFF Admin Staff Chief Counselor Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: At SouthernMoss' side forever! Contributor Posts: 13,854	Re: The snoring Dog... ROTFLMAO !!!!! __________________ *The flag represents a living country and is itself considered a living thing.* *The only criminal class native to the United States is Congress.*

01-15-2008, 04:31 PM	#7
inplanotx Advanced Senior Member Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: Texas Posts: 8,897	Re: The snoring Dog... __________________

01-15-2008, 10:12 PM	#8
justdoug V.I.P. Member Join Date: Dec 2007 Posts: 410	Re: The snoring Dog... Yeah that's a good one. The original version came in song form with words and music by Mike Cross - The Best of the Funny Stuff - is the album. I recommend this to anybody who enjoys a little bluegrass and a lot of laughs. Here's a link to his site: http://www.mikecross.com/discs.asp They list the song - but it's only a sample. __________________ "It's faster horses, younger women, older whiskey, and more money." Tom T. Hall