bad day at work

Trog777
Member
Posts: 13
(3/6/03 3:12:18 pm)
Reply | Edit | Del All bad day at work
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Next time you have a bad day at work. . . think of this guy. Rob is a
commercial saturation diver for Global Divers in Louisiana. He performs
underwater repairs on offshore drilling rigs.

Below is an E-mail he sent to his sister. She then sent it to The X, 103.2
FM in Ft Wayne IN, who was sponsoring a "worst job experience" contest.
Needless to say, she won.

"Hi Sue, Just another note from your bottom-dwelling brother. Last week I
had a bad day at the office. I know you've been feeling down lately at
work, so I thought I would share my dilemma with you to make you realize
it's not so bad after all. Before I can tell you what happened to me, I
first must bore you with a few technicalities of my job.

As you know, my office lies at the bottom of the sea. I wear a suit to the
office. It's a wetsuit. This time of year the water is quite cool.

So what we do to keep warm is this: we have a diesel powered industrial
water heater. This $20,000 piece of equipment sucks the water out of the
sea, heats it to a delightful temperature, then pumps it down to the diver
through a garden hose, which is taped to the air hose.

Now this sounds like a darn good plan, and I've used it several times with
no complaints.

What I do, when I get to the bottom and start working, is take the hose and
stuff it down the back of my wetsuit. This floods my whole suit with warm
water. It's like working in a Jacuzzi.

Everything was going well until all of a sudden, my butt started to itch.
So, of course, I scratched it. This only made things worse. Within a few
seconds my butt started to burn. I pulled the hose out from my back, but
the damage was done. In agony, I realized what had happened.

The hot water machine had sucked up a jellyfish and pumped it into my suit.
Now since I don't have any hair on my back, the jellyfish couldn't stick to
it. However, the crack of my butt was not as fortunate.

When I scratched what I thought was an itch, I was actually grinding the
jellyfish into my butt. I informed the dive supervisor of my dilemma over
the communicator. His instructions were unclear due to the fact that he,
along with 5 other divers, were all laughing hysterically. Needless to say
I aborted the dive.

I was instructed to make 3 agonizing in-water decompression stops totaling
35 minutes before I could reach the surface to begin my chamber dry
decompression.

When I arrived at the surface, I was wearing nothing but my brass helmet.
As I climbed out of the water, the medic, with tears of laughter running
down his face, handed me a tube of cream and told me to rub it on my butt
as soon as I got in the chamber.

The cream put the fire out, but I couldn't poop for 2 days because my
rectum was swollen shut.

So, next time you're having a bad day at work, think about how much worse
it would be if you had a jellyfish shoved up your butt.