The moral to the story
Little Timmy was asked in 1st grade to tell a story that happen to him or someone in his family and to give a moral to that story.
"Well, my Aunt Ethal flew supplies in the 1st Gulf War and one day her plane was hit by ground fire. She pulled the ejector and out she went. All she had with her was a machine gun, a knife and a bottle of Jack Daniels.
She knew it was going to be a rough landing and she didn't want to break her bottle, so she drank the entire thing on the way down.
As luck would have it, she landed in the middle of 1000 enemy soldiers. She took her machine gun and killed the 1st 500 of them till her ammo ran out. Then she took her knife and gutted 400 more. When her knife broke, she beat the last 100 of them to death with her bare hands.
That's what happened to my Aunt Ethal."
Horrified at the story, the teacher asked "What possible moral could there be to THAT story?!"
Little Timmy, without blinking said "Don't screw with Aunt Ethal when she's been drinking."