Life's little lessons - The Firearms Forum

swanshot · 06-20-2003, 06:59 AM

Subject: Life's little lessons
GREAT TRUTHS ABOUT LIFE, THAT LITTLE CHILDREN HAVE LEARNED

1) No matter how hard you try, you can't baptize cats.
2) When your Mom is mad at your Dad, don't let her brush your hair.
3) If your sister hits you, don't hit her back. They always catch the
second person.
4) Never ask your 3-year old brother to hold a tomato.
5) You can't trust dogs to watch your food.
6) Don't sneeze when someone is cutting your hair.
7) Never hold a Dust-Buster and a cat at the same time.
8) You can't hide a piece of broccoli in a glass of milk.
9) Don't wear polka-dot underwear under white shorts.
10) The best place to be when you're sad is Grandpa's lap, he will pay
you to be happy.

GREAT TRUTHS ABOUT LIFE,THAT ADULTS HAVE LEARNED

1) Raising teenagers is like nailing Jelly to a tree.
2) Wrinkles don't hurt.
3) Families are like fudge - mostly sweet, with a few nuts.
4) Today's mighty oak is just yesterday's nut that held its ground.
5) Laughing is good exercise. It's like jogging on the inside.
6) Middle age is when you choose your cereal for the fibre, not the toy.

GREAT TRUTHS ABOUT GROWING OLD

1) Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional.
2) Forget the health food. I need all the preservatives I can get.
3) When you fall down, you wonder what else you can do while you're
down there.
4) You're getting old when you get the same sensation from a rocking
chair that you once got from a roller coaster.
5) It's frustrating when you know all the answers, but nobody bothers
to ask you the questions.
6) Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician.
7) Wisdom comes with age, but sometimes age comes alone.

THE FOUR STAGES OF LIFE

1) You believe in Santa Claus.
2) You don't believe in Santa Claus.
3) You are Santa Claus.
4) You look like Santa Claus.

FN_Project90 · 06-20-2003, 02:25 PM

swan that picture gets me laughing everytime I notice it
hehe

Smokin Guns · 06-20-2003, 07:11 PM

Reckon I'll hang on to this one and send it 'round the network!...Thanks Swan!...

inplanotx · 06-21-2003, 10:16 AM

A definate keeper, thanks, Swan!

swanshot · 06-21-2003, 07:51 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by FN_Project90
swan that picture gets me laughing everytime I notice it
hehe

Glad ya like it FN. My wife found it in a magazine and I just had to have it

06-20-2003, 06:59 AM	#1
swanshot Advanced Senior Member Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: Perth western australia Posts: 1,436	Life's little lessons Subject: Life's little lessons GREAT TRUTHS ABOUT LIFE, THAT LITTLE CHILDREN HAVE LEARNED 1) No matter how hard you try, you can't baptize cats. 2) When your Mom is mad at your Dad, don't let her brush your hair. 3) If your sister hits you, don't hit her back. They always catch the second person. 4) Never ask your 3-year old brother to hold a tomato. 5) You can't trust dogs to watch your food. 6) Don't sneeze when someone is cutting your hair. 7) Never hold a Dust-Buster and a cat at the same time. 8) You can't hide a piece of broccoli in a glass of milk. 9) Don't wear polka-dot underwear under white shorts. 10) The best place to be when you're sad is Grandpa's lap, he will pay you to be happy. GREAT TRUTHS ABOUT LIFE,THAT ADULTS HAVE LEARNED 1) Raising teenagers is like nailing Jelly to a tree. 2) Wrinkles don't hurt. 3) Families are like fudge - mostly sweet, with a few nuts. 4) Today's mighty oak is just yesterday's nut that held its ground. 5) Laughing is good exercise. It's like jogging on the inside. 6) Middle age is when you choose your cereal for the fibre, not the toy. GREAT TRUTHS ABOUT GROWING OLD 1) Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional. 2) Forget the health food. I need all the preservatives I can get. 3) When you fall down, you wonder what else you can do while you're down there. 4) You're getting old when you get the same sensation from a rocking chair that you once got from a roller coaster. 5) It's frustrating when you know all the answers, but nobody bothers to ask you the questions. 6) Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician. 7) Wisdom comes with age, but sometimes age comes alone. THE FOUR STAGES OF LIFE 1) You believe in Santa Claus. 2) You don't believe in Santa Claus. 3) You are Santa Claus. 4) You look like Santa Claus. __________________ If you don't bleed you haven't bin trying -->

06-20-2003, 02:25 PM	#2
FN_Project90 Senior Member Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: Atlanta, GA, USA Posts: 803	swan that picture gets me laughing everytime I notice it hehe __________________ Things n' Stuff

06-20-2003, 07:11 PM	#3
Smokin Guns Advanced Senior Member Join Date: Jul 2002 Location: "Gun Culture Members Clubhouse"... Posts: 4,463	Reckon I'll hang on to this one and send it 'round the network!...Thanks Swan!... __________________

06-21-2003, 10:16 AM	#4
inplanotx Advanced Senior Member Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: Texas Posts: 8,897	A definate keeper, thanks, Swan! Attached Images __________________