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|02-25-2011, 07:56 PM||#1|
Advanced Senior Member
Join Date: Dec 2008
7 degrees of blond
A married couple is asleep when the phone rings at 2 in the morning.
The very blonde wife answers, listens a moment, then says,
“How should I know, that's 200 miles from here!” and hangs up.
Her husband asks, 'Who was that?'
The wife says, 'I don't know, some woman wanting to know if the coast is clear.'
Two blondes are walking down the street.
One notices a compact on the sidewalk and picks it up.
She opens it, looks in the mirror and says, “Hmm, this person looks familiar.”
The second blonde says, “Let me see!”
The first blonde hands her the compact.
The second blonde looks in the mirror and says, “Of course it does, dummy: it's me!'
A blonde suspects her boyfriend is cheating on her, so she buys a gun.
She goes to his apartment unexpectedly, opens the door and finds him in the arms of a redhead.
The blonde is overcome with grief. She opens her purse, pulls out the gun and puts it to her head.
The boyfriend yells, “No, honey, don't do it!”
The blonde replies, “Shut up, you're next!”
A blonde was bragging about her knowledge of state capitals and bragged to a friend,
“Go ahead, ask me. I know 'em all.”
“OK,” says the friend, “What's the capital of Wisconsin?”
“That’s easy,” says the blonde. “W.”
Her doctor told a blonde she was pregnant.
To which she replies: “Is it mine?”
Bambi, a blonde – and 4th year Freshman at UCLA – sat in her US Government class.
The professor asked Bambi to explain Roe vs. Wade.
Bambi pondered a moment, then said,
“That was the decision George Washington had to make before he crossed the Delaware.”
Returning home from work, a blonde was shocked to find her house ransacked and burglarized.
She called the police and the dispatcher ordered a K-9 unit to respond.
As the officer approached the house with his dog, the blonde sat down on the porch and put her face in her hands.
She moaned, “I come home to find all my stuff stolen. I call the police, and what do they do?
They send me a blind cop!”
Who are you going to serve today?