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AUSTRALIAN PASSPORT APPLICATION LETTER:

1K views 7 replies 5 participants last post by  Gun Geezer 
#1 · (Edited by Moderator)
AUSTRALIAN LETTER - I think the sender might have been upset!
This is an actual letter sent to the DFAT (Department of Foreign Affairs and Trade) Immigration Minister. The Government tried desperately to censure the author, but got nowhere because every legal person who read it couldn't stop laughing!

Dear Mr Minister,

I'm in the process of renewing my passport, and still cannot believe this.

How is it that K-Mart has my address and telephone number, and knows that I bought a television set and golf clubs and condoms from them back in 1997, and yet the Federal Government is still asking me where I was born
and on what date ?

For Goodness sakes, do you guys do this by hand?

My birth date you have in my Medicare information, and it is on all the income tax forms I've filed for the past 40 years.

It is also on my driver's licence, on the last eight passports I've ever had, on all those stupid customs declaration forms I've had to fill out before being allowed off planes over the past 30 years.

It's also on all those insufferable census forms that I've filled out every 5 years since 1966.

Also... would somebody please take note, once and for all, that my mother's name is Audrey, my father's name is Jack, and I'd be absolutely bloody astounded if that ever changed between now and when I drop dead !!!

What do you people do with all this information we keep having to provide?

I apologize, Mr. Minister. But I'm really pissed off this morning.

Between you and me, I've had enough of all this bull! You send the application to my house, then you ask me for my bloody address!

What the hell is going on with your mob? Have you got a gang of mindless Neanderthal arseholes working there!

And another thing, look at my picture. Do I look like Bin Laden? I can't even grow a beard for Goodness sakes. I just want to go to New Zealand and see my new granddaughter. (Yes, my son interbred with a Kiwi girl). And would someone please tell me, why would you give a crap whether or not I plan on visiting a farm in the next 15 days? In the unlikely event I ever got the urge to do something weird to a sheep or a horse, believe you me, I'd sure as hell not want to tell anyone!

Well, I have to go now, 'cause I have to go to the other side of Sydney and get another bloody copy of my birth certificate - and to part with another $80 for the privilege of accessing MY OWN INFORMATION!

Would it be so complicated to have all the services in the same spot, to assist in the issuance of a new passport on the same day?

Nooooo…that'd be too bloody easy and makes far too much sense.

You would much prefer to have us running all over the bloody place like chickens with our heads cut off, and then having to find some 'high-society' wanker to confirm that it's really me in the photo! You know the photo... the one where we're not allowed to smile?...you bloody morons.

Signed - An Irate Australian Citizen.

P.S. Remember what I said above about the picture, and getting someone in 'high-society' to confirm that it's me? Well, my family has been in this country since before 1820! In 1856, one of my forefathers took up arms with Peter Lalor. (You do remember the Eureka Stockade?)

I have also served in both the CMF and regular Army for something over 30 years (I went to Vietnam in 1967), and still have high security clearances. I'm also a personal friend of the president of the RSL....Lt General Peter Cosgrove sends me a Christmas card each year.

However, your rules require that I have to get someone "important" to verify who I am; you know...someone like my doctor - WHO WAS BORN AND RAISED IN BLOODY PAKISTAN! ... a country where they either assassinate or hang their ex-Prime Ministers - and are suspended from the Commonwealth and United Nations for not having the "right sort of government"..

You are all pen-pushing paper-shuffling bloody idiots!
 
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#7 ·
GREETINGS, ANGIE! Not an uncommon name because of the constant advertising of 'ANGIE'S LIST' on TV. My grand daughter-in-law is former Army...her name is Melody...She and grandson Bryan got together a few years back and Bryan went for a tour in the Army vs. the Navy Seabees I favored for him to join. He did a tour in Afghanistan but now is out living near us here in Glendale Az. and going to college studying to be an EMT.. Yeah, I've been around here forever.. since day one here on the Viet board...I did 20 in the Seabees and rather than stay longer and go back to Vietnam the 3rd time, bailed out...that's the only gun I have anymore...a S&W Mod 49...would like to have gloomed onto a 1911 that I packed many years in the service...keep the practice going...never know... could be more handy than a pancake turner! Chief
 
#8 ·
Seems like the Aussie bureaucrats are just as bad as ours. A few yrs. ago my wife had to renew her passport so we could go on a cruise. In Wisconsin, you have to mail in your birth certificate & they mail it back to you with the new passport. A few weeks later, the new passport arrived but no birth certificate. We had to drive to Shawno WI. to the courthouse to get a replacement BC. When we asked why the original BC wasn't returned to us the girl said that they most likely didn't have the correct address. Seriously?
 
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