Democrate, Republican or a Southerner?

Discussion in 'The Pump House Saloon' started by Zane71464, Mar 5, 2010.

  1. Zane71464

    Zane71464 Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Aug 1, 2009
    Messages:
    5,973
    Location:
    Ohio NRA Member
    Here is an email my friend sent me and thought
    it was appropriate.

    Are you a Democrat, a Republican, or a Southerner?
    Here is a little test that will help you decide.


    The answer can be found by posing the following question:

    You ' re walking down a
    deserted street with your wife
    and two small children.

    Suddenly, an Islamic
    Terrorist with a huge knife
    comes around the corner,
    locks eyes with you,
    screams obscenities, praises
    Allah, raises the knife, and charges at you...

    You are carrying a
    Kimber 1911 cal. 45 ACP, and you are an expert shot.
    You have mere seconds before he reaches you and your family.
    What do you do?



    THINK CAREFULLY AND
    THEN SCROLL DOWN:


    Democrat ' s Answer:
    Well, that ' s not enough information to answer the question!
    Does the man look poor or oppressed?
    Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to attack?
    Could we run away?
    What does my wife think?
    What about the kids?
    Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock the knife out of his hand?
    What does the law say about this situation?
    Does the pistol have appropriate safety built into it?
    Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what kind of message does this send to society and to my children?
    Is it possible he ' d be happy with just killing me?
    Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be content just to wound me?
    If I were to grab his knees and hold on, could my family get away while he was stabbing me?
    Should I call 9-1-1?
    Why is this street so deserted?
    We need to raise taxes, have paint & weed day.
    Can we make this a happier, healthier street that would discourage such behavior.
    I need to debate this with some friends for a few days and try to come to a consensus.
    This is all so confusing!

    ..............................................................................
    Republican ' s Answer:

    BANG!


    ........................................................................
    Southerner ' s Answer:

    BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
    BANG ! BANG! BANG! BANG!
    Click..... (Sounds of reloading)
    BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
    BANG!
    BANG!
    BANG!
    Click

    Daughter: ' Nice grouping, Daddy! '
    ' Were those the Winchester Silver Tips or Hollow Points?! '

    Son: ' Can I shoot the next one?! '

    Wife: ' You ain ' t taking that to the Taxidermist!
  2. bamajoey

    bamajoey Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Aug 17, 2009
    Messages:
    1,715
    Location:
    Pensacola
    I'm a southerner through and through.
  3. jack404

    jack404 Former Guest

    Joined:
    Jan 11, 2010
    Messages:
    17,575
    Location:
    Australia
    i guess i'm a southerner too then, now hows a aussie accent gonna say "howdy y'aaalll"

    hmmm....
  4. carver

    carver Moderator

    Joined:
    Jul 28, 2008
    Messages:
    17,575
    Location:
    DAV, Deep in the Pineywoods of East Texas, just we
    "howdy y'aaalll" (with an Aussie accenty) will do just fine!:D
  5. Marlin

    Marlin *TFF Admin Staff Chief Counselor*

    Joined:
    Mar 27, 2003
    Messages:
    13,856
    Location:
    At SouthernMoss' side forever!
    Now, that's FUNNY, Mate !!!!!! :D :D :D
  6. Eddie N

    Eddie N New Member

    Joined:
    Apr 23, 2009
    Messages:
    1,192
    Location:
    Colorado
    Born in PA, vote Republican, but my answer says "Southerner"!:D
  7. Maximilian II

    Maximilian II New Member

    Joined:
    May 25, 2009
    Messages:
    1,385
    Location:
    Northwest GA
    Jack, we've gotten my son in law to say "G'day y'all" and it's hilarious! Totally freaks the Wal Mart cashiers out.
  8. The_Rifleman

    The_Rifleman New Member

    Joined:
    Feb 10, 2010
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    873
    Location:
    Ohio
    LOL! Too funny!
  9. Old Grump

    Old Grump New Member

    Joined:
    Feb 21, 2010
    Messages:
    2,320
    Location:
    Little hut in the woods near Blue River Wisconsin
    Southerner wastes to much ammo, conservative in me says 1 - 3 bullets per target should be sufficient. You never know when you might have to put down a Democrat in a mercy killing to end their unbearable anguish.
  10. ryan_marine

    ryan_marine New Member

    Joined:
    Aug 4, 2004
    Messages:
    919
    Location:
    Ohio
    Sorry I am a republican. I don't need to waste ammo. 1 with a 45acp will do.

    Ray
  11. Big ugly

    Big ugly New Member

    Joined:
    Feb 27, 2009
    Messages:
    2,682
    Location:
    Knoxville Tennessee
    I'd go redneck on em, something like this.



    Bang, right knee. Bang, Left knee. Bang, left shoulder. Bang, Right shoulder. BangBangBangBangBang Crotch.
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