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Did anybody else get a census form like this

Discussion in 'The Pump House Saloon' started by jestor, May 5, 2010.

  1. jestor

    jestor New Member

    Joined:
    Aug 18, 2009
    Messages:
    129
    Location:
    Mississippi
    2010 CENSUS for rednecks

    Last name: ________________

    First name: (Check appropriate box)
    (_) Billy-Bob
    (_) Billy-Joe
    (_) Billy-Ray
    (_) Billy-Sue
    (_) Billy-Mae
    (_) Billy-Jack

    What does everyone call you?
    (_) Booger
    (_) Bubba
    (_) Junior
    (_) Sissy
    (_) Other___________________

    Age: ____ (if unsure, guess)

    Sex: ____ M _____ F _____ Not sure

    Shoe Size: ____ Left ____ Right

    Occupation: (Check appropriate box)
    (_) Farmer
    (_) Mechanic
    (_) Hair Dresser
    (_) Unemployed
    (_) Dirty Politician
    (_) Preacher

    Spouse’s Name:_________________________
    2nd Spouse’s Name:______________________
    3rd Spouse’s Name:______________________
    Lover’s Name:___________________________

    Relationship with spouse: (Check appropriate box)
    (_) Sister
    (_) Brother
    (_) Aunt
    (_) Uncle
    (_) Cousin
    (_) Mother
    (_) Father
    (_) Son
    (_) Daughter
    (_) Pet

    Number of children living in household: _____
    Number of children living in shed: ______
    Number that are yours: ______

    Mother’s Name: _______________________(If not sure, leave blank)
    Father’s Name: _______________________ (If not sure, leave blank)
    Education: 1 2 3 4 (Circle highest grade completed)

    Do you (_) own or (_) rent your mobile home? (Check appropriate box)

    Total number of vehicles you own: ___
    Number of vehicles that still crank: ___
    Number of vehicles in front yard: ___
    Number of vehicles in back yard: ___
    Number of vehicles on cement blocks: ___

    Firearms you own and where you keep them:
    ____ truck
    ____ bedroom
    ____ bathroom
    ____ kitchen
    ____ shed

    Model and year of your pickup: 196_

    Do you have a gun rack?
    (_) Yes (_) No; If no, please explain:

    Newspapers/magazines you subscribe to:
    (_) The National Enquirer
    (_) The Globe
    (_) TV Guide
    (_) Soap Opera Digest
    (_) Rifle and Shotgun

    Number of times you’ve seen a UFO:_____
    Number of times in the last 5 years you’ve seen Elvis:_____
    Number of times you’ve seen Elvis in a UFO:_____

    How often do you bathe:
    (_) Weekly
    (_) Monthly
    (_) Not Applicable

    Color of eyes:
    Left______ Right_____

    Color of hair:
    (_) Blond
    (_) Black
    (_) Red
    (_) Brown
    (_) White
    (_) Clairol

    Color of teeth:
    (_) Yellow
    (_) Brownish-Yellow
    (_) Brown
    (_) Black
    (_) N/A

    Brand of chewing tobacco you prefer:
    (_)Red-Man

    How far is your home from a paved road?
    (_) 1 mile
    (_) 2 miles
    (_) just a whoop-and-a-holler
    (_) road?
  2. navis128

    navis128 New Member

    Joined:
    Sep 15, 2009
    Messages:
    1,392
    Location:
    Texas
    I started laughing when the cursor rolled over the title and the little window popped up.

    That is a kick in the pants Dude, 'cept for the dirt road one :D:D:D
    Last edited: May 5, 2010
  3. Trouble 45-70

    Trouble 45-70 New Member

    Joined:
    Apr 10, 2009
    Messages:
    2,703
    Location:
    NE Ar. W. of Black River
    Like it.
    Last edited: May 6, 2010
  4. wpage

    wpage Active Member

    Joined:
    Aug 25, 2009
    Messages:
    1,482
    That is beautiful!
  5. jim summers

    jim summers Active Member

    Joined:
    Jul 13, 2008
    Messages:
    1,191
    Location:
    I reside in southern Indiana, you can almost step
    Them poor rednecks catch hell all the time.
  6. Pixcutter

    Pixcutter Member

    Joined:
    Jan 12, 2010
    Messages:
    44
    Location:
    Los Angeles, California
    Where's the California version (you know, in 9 different languages)?
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