Getting a loan

Discussion in 'The Pump House Saloon' started by Gunfyter, Jul 30, 2003.

  1. Gunfyter

    Gunfyter New Member

    Joined:
    Mar 25, 2003
    Messages:
    1,956
    Location:
    Western Maryland
    Everyone who has ever bought a house, sold a house, or financed a house can enjoy this.


    New Orleans lawyer sought an FHA loan for a client. He was told the loan would be granted if he could prove satisfactory title to a parcel of property being offered as collateral. The title to the property dated back to 1803, which took the Lawyer three months to track down.

    After sending the information to the FHA, he received the following reply

    (actual letter):

    "Upon review of your letter adjoining your client's loan application, we note that the request is supported by an Abstract of Title. While we compliment the able manner in which you have prepared and presented the application, we must point out that you have only cleared title to the proposed collateral property back to 1803. Before final approval can be accorded, it will be necessary to clear the title back to its origin."

    Annoyed, the lawyer responded as follows (actual letter):

    "Your letter regarding title in Case No. 189156 has been received. I note that you wish to have title extended further than the 194 years
    covered by the present application. I was unaware that any educated person in this country, particularly those working in the property
    area, would not know that Louisiana was purchased, by the U.S. from France in 1803, the year of origin identified in our application.

    "For the edification of uninformed FHA bureaucrats, the title to the land prior to U.S. ownership was obtained from France, which had
    acquired it by Right of Conquest from Spain. The land came into the possession of Spain by Right of Discovery made in the year 1492 by a sea captain named Christopher Columbus, who had been granted the privilege of seeking a new route to India by the Spanish monarch, Isabella.

    The good queen, Isabella, being a pious woman and almost as careful about titles as the FHA, took the precaution of securing the blessing of the Pope before she sold her jewels to finance Columbus' expedition.

    Now the Pope, as I'm sure you may know, is the emissary of Jesus Christ, the Son of God, and God, it is commonly accepted, created this world. Therefore, I believe it is safe to presume that God also made that part of the world called Louisiana.

    God, therefore, would be the owner of origin and His origins date back, to before the beginning of time, the world as we know it AND the FHA.

    I hope to hell you find God's original claim to be satisfactory. Now, may we have our damn loan?"

    The loan was approved.

    :D :D :D :D
  2. gpostal

    gpostal Former Guest

    Joined:
    Feb 20, 2003
    Messages:
    4,552
    true story

    just last year ,we put our house up for sale ,the loan company ran us through the coals for three months

    after their final revue to aprove the loan they wanted a new aprasial before they sent it to the underwriter

    why you ask


    the first picture of our house on 80 acres ,with no other house possible in sight, seven miles outside of town,had three chickens running across the yard

    they ordered the aprasial redone ,this time without the chickens

    quote:to make the house "look not so rural"
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