Great Truths

Discussion in 'The Pump House Saloon' started by Gunfyter, Nov 10, 2004.

  1. Gunfyter

    Gunfyter New Member

    Joined:
    Mar 25, 2003
    Messages:
    1,956
    Location:
    Western Maryland
    GREAT TRUTHS THAT LITTLE CHILDREN HAVE LEARNED:

    1) No matter how hard you try, you can't baptize cats.
    2) When your Mom is mad at your Dad, don't let her brush your hair.
    3) If your sister hits you, don't hit her back. They always catch the second person.
    4) Never ask your 3-year old brother to hold a tomato.
    5) You can't trust dogs to watch your food.
    6) Don't sneeze when someone is cutting your hair.
    7) Never hold a Dust-Buster and a cat at the same time.
    8) You can't hide a piece of broccoli in a glass of milk.
    9) Don't wear polka-dot underwear under white shorts.
    10) The best place to be when you're sad is Grandpa's lap.



    GREAT TRUTHS THAT ADULTS HAVE LEARNED:

    1) Raising teenagers is like nailing Jell-O to a tree.
    2) Wrinkles don't hurt.
    3) Families are like fudge...mostly sweet, with a few nuts.
    4) Today's mighty oak is just yesterday's nut that held its ground.
    5) Laughing is good exercise. It's like jogging on the inside.
    6) Middle age is when you choose your cereal for the fiber, not the toy.



    GREAT TRUTHS ABOUT GROWING OLD

    1) Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional.
    2) Forget the health food. I need all the preservatives I can get.
    3) When you fall down, you wonder what else you can do while you're down there.
    4) You're getting old when you get the same sensation from a rocking chair that you once got from a roller
    coaster.
    5) It's frustrating when you know all the answers but nobody bothers to ask you the questions.
    6) Time may be a great healer, ! but it's a lousy beautician.
    7) Wisdom comes with age, but sometimes age comes alone.




    THE FOUR STAGES OF LIFE:

    1) You believe in Santa Claus.
    2) You don't believe in Santa Claus.
    3) You are Santa Claus.
    4) You look like Santa Claus.



    SUCCESS:

    At age 4 success is . . not peeing in your pants.
    At age 12 success is . . having friends.
    At age 16 success is . . having a drivers license.
    At age 20 success is . . going all the way.
    At age 35 success is . . having money.
    At age 50 success is . . having money.
    At age 60 success is . . going all the way.
    At age 70 success is . . having a drivers license.
    At age 75 success is . . having friends.
    At age 80 success is . . not peeing in your pants.
  2. SouthernMoss

    SouthernMoss *Admin Tech Staff*

    Joined:
    Jan 1, 2003
    Messages:
    10,657
    Location:
    SW MS
  3. 358 winchester

    358 winchester *TFF Admin Staff*

    Joined:
    Apr 25, 2004
    Messages:
    7,335
    Location:
    Pensacola Fl. area
    Yep that about sums it up :D :D :D
  4. Marlin

    Marlin *TFF Admin Staff Chief Counselor*

    Joined:
    Mar 27, 2003
    Messages:
    13,854
    Location:
    At SouthernMoss' side forever!
    Pretty much says it all!!!!!!

    Attached Files:

  5. ibtrukn

    ibtrukn New Member

    Joined:
    May 13, 2001
    Messages:
    4,335
    Location:
    central N.J.
    IB got sum frens dat go all da way-----------Dats GINA not Gino, stoonod!! :cool:
  6. IShootBack

    IShootBack Active Member

    Joined:
    Sep 22, 2002
    Messages:
    2,516
    Location:
    Virginia
Similar Threads
Forum Title Date
The Pump House Saloon Summary Of Life Great Truths Jan 14, 2007
The Pump House Saloon Wow! Great film clip of traffic in olden days! Feb 21, 2014
The Pump House Saloon Can the Great American Beast be ridden? Sep 21, 2013
The Pump House Saloon We Remember..... great video Feb 21, 2013
The Pump House Saloon Barry O'Drama - The Great Pretender Oct 30, 2012