It's Crp and Pistol's fault!!

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by SouthernMoss, Nov 17, 2007.

  1. SouthernMoss

    SouthernMoss *Admin Tech Staff*

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    They complained about being sick while I was on our trip, and now I'm sick. :mad: My throat was so raw last night I couldn't sleep, and today my tonsils are so swollen they feel like they're touching. My head hurts, my ears hurt, I have a coughing spell every time I try to talk ... in general, I just feel miserable. :( :(

    And poor Marlin has to put up with me all weekend. :eek: :rolleyes:
  2. rosierita

    rosierita New Member

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    :( i hope you're feeling better SOON!!
  3. <-----pleading "nolo contendere" and throwing myself on the mercy of the court! :D
  4. Bruce FLinch

    Bruce FLinch New Member

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    Let's send out a rescue party for Marlin! :) Marlin! Back away from the sick Lady!

    Maybe Rosie can send over..(CHICKEN ) Soup! :D

    Get better SoMo! & don't share your keyboard w/ Marlin..:eek:
  5. catfish83861

    catfish83861 Active Member

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    Sorry to hear that your not as chipper as normal but tomorrow I hope your back to feeling great. catfish
  6. delta13soultaker

    delta13soultaker New Member

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    I, delta13 , WANT TO MAKE THE FOLLOWING STATEMENT UNDER OATH:

    that on or about yesterday I observed two funny looking fellows dressed in bad disguises with big wigs and brown bellbottom pants, who I recognized to be Crp and Pistol, who were double dipping nachos into the cheese dip and atleast three times put their heads in the punch bowl and once drank Dr. Pepper directly from the two liter bottle. ------Nothing Follows------

    I, delta 13, HAVE READ OR HAVE HAD READ TO ME THIS STATEMENT WHICH BEGINS ON PAGE 1, AND ENDS ON PAGE 1. I FULLY UNDERSTAND THE CONTENTS OF THE ENTIRE STATEMENT MADE BY ME. THE STATEMENT IS TRUE. I HAVE INITIALED ALL CORRECTIONS AND HAVE INITIALED THE BOTTOM OF EACH PAGE
    CONTAINING THE STATEMENT. I HAVE MADE THIS STATEMENT FREELY WITHOUT HOPE OF BENEFIT OR REWARD, WITHOUT
    THREAT OF PUNISHMENT, AND WITHOUT COERCION, UNLAWFUL INFLUENCE, OR UNLAWFUL INDUCEMENT.

    ORGANIZATION OR ADDRESS: *******************

    WITNESSES: ***** ******

    INITIALS OF PERSON MAKING STATEMENT: d1s
  7. Donny made me do it!!!!! Besides, the statement doesn't mention that "someone," allegedly the aforementioned affiant, spiked the punch bowl with Irish whiskey! It was entrapment, I say, entrapment!!!! :D;):p
  8. Bruce FLinch

    Bruce FLinch New Member

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    It's a miniature Right Wing Conspiracy! :eek:
  9. delta13soultaker

    delta13soultaker New Member

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    They expert witnesses shall explain to the court how the alleged spiking of the punch in question with Irish whiskey would be irrelevant because the defendant was already highly intoxicated on Austrian spirits. Futhermore, the affiant at this time has not been charged, and no motoin to merge hearings will be entertained should charges be brought to the affiant. :D
  10. delta13soultaker

    delta13soultaker New Member

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    And don't try to confuse the jury by claiming there was a third dipper seen crossing the knoll lol
  11. Bruce FLinch

    Bruce FLinch New Member

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    Marlin? Can you translate the Militaristic Jurisdictional Legalspeak? :D
  12. delta13soultaker

    delta13soultaker New Member

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    Pistol was already drunk anyway on beer...

    Delta hasn't been charged....

    Delta will not be tried in the same court as those he testifies against if he is later charged...

    :D
  13. Bruce FLinch

    Bruce FLinch New Member

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    So...You're a Victim of Circumstances..You had one traumatic experience as a child. Your Mother smoked a cigarette while she was pregnant & your Father never wore a seat belt, while driving to Church..



    NOT GUILTY! :D
  14. delta13soultaker

    delta13soultaker New Member

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    Yep...now ya gotta take it to civil court lol
  15. Mosin_Nagant_Fan

    Mosin_Nagant_Fan Active Member

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    Drink plenty of liquids (limited to water for at least 3 days), keep warm, chicken soup or broth, over the counter cold and flu medicine. Most importantly of all, go see a doctor.

    Hope you feel better.
  16. Your honor, defense moves to have the above statement stricken from the record due to gross and willful misrepresentation of facts. The "spirits" to which affiant so carelessly and callously alludes were, in fact, German, not Austrian (empty bottles of DunklesBock submitted herewith as defense exhibit "A"), thus proving affiant's collusion with plaintiff in this matter. Defense further moves that affiant be immediately bound over for trial on a charge of willful perjury under oath. :D;):p
  17. Bruce FLinch

    Bruce FLinch New Member

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    This is better than Court TV! :)

    Now let's not let the victim's rights be trampled! Is SoMo feeling any better?
  18. pickenup

    pickenup Active Member

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    Feeling better?
    Hope so.
  19. Crpdeth

    Crpdeth Active Member

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    Sounds like you got a mild case Ginga...You'll be fine in no time. :p

    Crpdeth
  20. delta13soultaker

    delta13soultaker New Member

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    The affiant presents his German ex-girlfriend as expert witness to testify that the affiant believed Austria and Germany to be close enough to be called the same in loose geographic terms due to the fact that the affiant feels the beerwenches look and speek the same way. Further, the affiant has voluntarily provided at his own expense a round of both German an Austrian spirits for the court to sample to verify beyond reasonable doubt the the spirits in question are "close enuff". :D
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