Mature Lady Drivers

Discussion in 'The Pump House Saloon' started by Pixcutter, May 12, 2010.

  1. Pixcutter

    Pixcutter New Member

    Joined:
    Jan 12, 2010
    Messages:
    43
    Location:
    Los Angeles, California
    A mature (over 40) lady gets pulled over for speeding...

    Older Woman: Is there a problem, Officer?
    Officer: Ma'am, you were speeding.
    Older Woman: Oh, I see.
    Officer: Can I see your license please?
    Older Woman: I'd give it to you but I don't have one.
    Officer: Don't have one?
    Older Woman: Lost it, 4 years ago for drunk driving.
    Officer: I see...Can I see your vehicle registration papers
    please.
    Older Woman: I can't do that.
    Officer: Why not?
    Older Woman: I stole this car.
    Officer: Stole it?
    Older Woman: Yes, and I killed and hacked up the owner.
    Officer: You what?
    Older Woman: His body parts are in plastic bags in the trunk. Want to see?

    The Officer looks at the woman and slowly backs away to his car and calls for back up. Within minutes 5 police cars circle the car. A senior officer slowly approaches the car, clasping his half drawn gun.

    Officer 2: Ma'am, could you step out of your vehicle please!

    The woman steps out of her vehicle..

    Older woman: Is there a problem sir?
    Officer 2: One of my officers told me you had stolen the car and murdered
    the owner.
    Older Woman: Murdered the owner?
    Officer2: Yes, could you please open the trunk of your car, please.

    The woman opens the trunk, revealing nothing but an empty trunk.

    Officer 2: Is this your car, ma'am?
    Older Woman: Yes, here are the registration papers.

    The officer is quite stunned.

    Officer 2: One of my officers claims that you do not have a driving license.

    The woman digs into her handbag and pulls out a clutch purse and hands it to the officer.

    The officer examines the license. He looks quite puzzled.

    Officer 2: Thank you ma'am, one of my officers told me you didn't have a license, that you stole this car, and that you murdered and hacked up the owner.
    Older Woman: Bet the liar told you I was speeding, too.

    Don't Mess with Mature Ladies If you want to brighten someone's day, pass this on to someone you know.
  2. dianalv

    dianalv New Member

    Joined:
    Aug 3, 2009
    Messages:
    1,160
    Location:
    Las Vegas, Nevada
    Over forty is older woman? Hmph! According to Mrs. Brodie, that's a woman's prime.
  3. bmpeele

    bmpeele New Member

    Joined:
    Feb 27, 2010
    Messages:
    492
    Location:
    The grand old state of North Carolina
    Anyone know if this would actauly work?
  4. wpage

    wpage Active Member

    Joined:
    Aug 25, 2009
    Messages:
    1,482
    Hope my wife doesnt read this...
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