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Men's Thesaurus

Discussion in 'The Pump House Saloon' started by Bruce FLinch, Mar 30, 2006.

  1. Bruce FLinch

    Bruce FLinch New Member

    Joined:
    Aug 27, 2005
    Messages:
    5,015
    Location:
    Bay Point, Kali..aka Gun Point
    Subject: Men's Thesaurus...






    --------------------------------------------------------------------------------

    "I'M GOING FISHING"
    Means: "I'm going to drink myself dangerously stupid,and stand by a
    stream with a stick in my hand, while the fish swim by in complete
    safety."

    IT'S A GUY THING"
    Means: "There is no rational thought pattern connected with it, and you
    have no chance at all of making it logical".

    "CAN I HELP WITH DINNER?"
    Means: "Why isn't it already on the table?"

    "UH HUH," "SURE, HONEY," OR "YES, DEAR..."
    Means: Absolutely nothing. It's a conditioned response.

    "IT WOULD TAKE TOO LONG TO EXPLAIN"
    Means: "I have no idea how it works."

    "I WAS LISTENING TO YOU. IT'S JUST THAT I HAVE THINGS ON MY MIND."
    Means: "I was wondering if that redhead over there is wearing a bra."

    "TAKE A B REAK HONEY, YOU'RE WORKING TOO HARD".
    Means: "I can't hear the game over the vacuum cleaner."

    "THAT'S INTERESTING, DEAR."
    Means: "Are you still talking?"

    "YOU KNOW HOW BAD MY MEMORY IS."
    Means: "I remember the theme song to 'F Troop', the address of the first
    girl I ever kissed, and the vehicle identification numbers of every car
    I've ever owned, but I forgot your birthday."

    "I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT YOU, AND GOT YOU THESE ROSES".
    Means: "The girl selling them on the corner was a real babe."

    "I CAN'T FIND IT"
    Means: "It didn't fall into my outstretched hands, so I'm completely clueless."

    "I HEARD YOU."
    Means: "I haven't the foggiest clue what you just said."

    "YOU KNOW I COULD NEVER LOVE ANYONE ELSE."
    Means: "I am used to the way you yell at me, and realize it could be worse."

    "YOU LOOK TERRIFIC."
    Means: "Please don't try on one more outfit, I'm starving."

    "I'M NOT LOST. I KNOW EXACTLY WHERE WE ARE."
    Means: "No one will ever see us alive again."

    "WE SHARE THE HOUSEWORK."
    Means: "I make the messes, she cleans them up
  2. southernshooter

    southernshooter New Member

    Joined:
    Mar 5, 2006
    Messages:
    5,956
    Location:
    Deep South Mississippi
    Dang it man your tellin the ladies our secrets
  3. Bruce FLinch

    Bruce FLinch New Member

    Joined:
    Aug 27, 2005
    Messages:
    5,015
    Location:
    Bay Point, Kali..aka Gun Point
    I have to confess, I'm a Liberated Male Chauvinist :eek:
  4. inplanotx

    inplanotx New Member

    Joined:
    Jan 28, 2002
    Messages:
    8,889
    Location:
    Texas
  5. firebird

    firebird New Member

    Joined:
    Oct 13, 2005
    Messages:
    1,233
    Location:
    In the recesses of my little mind...
    Hehe...[​IMG]

  6. Marlin

    Marlin *TFF Admin Staff Chief Counselor*

    Joined:
    Mar 27, 2003
    Messages:
    13,856
    Location:
    At SouthernMoss' side forever!
    :D

    Attached Files:

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