Discussion in 'The Pump House Saloon' started by fedupdon, May 6, 2009.

  1. fedupdon

    fedupdon New Member

    Jun 3, 2008
    This is a true story. If you have children you will probably relate to this father).

    I Love Mustard

    As ham sandwiches go, it was perfection: a thick slab of ham on a fresh bun with crisp lettuce and plenty of expensive, light brown, Gourmet Mustard.

    The corners of my jaw aching in anticipation, I carried it to the table in our backyard, picked it up with both hands, but was stopped by my wife suddenly at my side..

    Here, hold Johnny (our six-week-old son) while I get my sandwich,' she said.

    I had him balanced between my left elbow and shoulder and was reaching again for the ham sandwich when I noticed a streak of mustard on my fingers.

    I love mustard.

    I had no napkin.

    I licked it off.

    It was not mustard.

    No man ever put a baby down faster.

    It was the first and only time I have sprinted with my
    tongue protruding out.

    With a washcloth in each hand, I did the sort of routine
    shoeshine boys do, only I did it on my tongue.

    Later, after she stopped crying from laughing so hard, my
    wife Said, 'Now you know why they call that fancy mustard
  2. ampaterry

    ampaterry *TFF Admin Staff Chaplain* Staff Member Supporting Member

    Dec 20, 2008
    West Tennessee
    Thanks, Don.

    You have just destroyed my desire to EVER put mustard on anything ever again - - -

    LOL :)

  3. 4EvrLearning

    4EvrLearning New Member

    Feb 27, 2009
    Left Coast
    rofl!!! Great the visuals!
  4. Nighthawk

    Nighthawk New Member

    Aug 22, 2006
    South Central Texas
    Thanks, that was good. :D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D
  5. muddober

    muddober Active Member

    Sep 19, 2008
    Carson City Nevada
    :eek:No it was NOT good, but it was very funny.:)
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