My Favorite Blonde Joke

Discussion in 'The Pump House Saloon' started by dianalv, Sep 11, 2009.

  1. dianalv

    dianalv New Member

    Aug 3, 2009
    Las Vegas, Nevada
    A woman was driving her Ferrari Red convertable down the road, wind streaming her long blonde hair out behind her and grooving to her favorite CD, when she spies something odd. Pulling over, she gets out of her car and stares in astonishment at the scene before her.

    There, in the middle of a bare dusty field, sits another blonde in a rowboat, working the oars for all she's worth, stirring up huge clouds of dust and getting precisely nowhere, of course, despite all her efforts.

    The woman from the convertable shakes her head in disgust and yells across the field, "What the heck do you think you're doing, you idiot? It's blondes like you who give the rest of us a bad name! Why, if I could swim, I'd come out there and kick your a$$!"
     
  2. dianalv

    dianalv New Member

    Aug 3, 2009
    Las Vegas, Nevada
    Just picture it in your head......
     

  3. JetGirl

    JetGirl Member

    206
    Dec 18, 2008
    Indiana
    One blonde yells to another across a river full of rapids, "HEY!! Tell me how to get on the other side!!"
    The second blonde yells back, "Silly!! You ARE on the other side!!"
     
  4. dianalv

    dianalv New Member

    Aug 3, 2009
    Las Vegas, Nevada
    A blonde gets in an accident. She takes her car to a body shop to get the dents fixed. The car mechanic decides to have a little fun with her. He tells her, "Well, Miss, it's gonna cost you $2980 for us to fix your car." He looks around furtively and beckons the blonde closer. He whispers in her ear, "Don't let the boss know I told you this, but you could fix this yourself for nothing."

    The blonde says, "Really??? How?"

    The mechanic, thoroughly enjoying himself, tells her to take the car home, to put it in the garage and let it cool off, then put her mouth around the tail pipe and blow really hard. "This will pop out the dents," he says sagely.

    The blonde thanks him profusely, then drives her car home and has lunch while the tail pipe cools.

    Sometime later her older sister comes home (also a blonde), and discovers her sibling on her knees behind her car blowing for all she's worth. "What the Heck do you think you're doing?" she asks incredulously. Her younger sister explains what the mechanic told her.

    "You dummy!" she exclaims. "That will never work! You've got to roll the windows up first!"
     
  5. Jay

    Jay Active Member

    Mar 26, 2003
    Indiana
    Miss Ann.... which one were you? :D
     
  6. JetGirl

    JetGirl Member

    206
    Dec 18, 2008
    Indiana
    The armed one.;)
     
  7. Kieran McCaig

    Kieran McCaig New Member

    Jul 8, 2009
    canada
    With that answer I'd say fake blonde
     
  8. dianalv

    dianalv New Member

    Aug 3, 2009
    Las Vegas, Nevada
    Hey, I'm blonde and I'm armed. Real blonde too. Why do you think I know so many blonde jokes? Heard 'em all my life.
     
  9. JetGirl

    JetGirl Member

    206
    Dec 18, 2008
    Indiana
    Ditto. And something else...blondes know the BEST blonde jokes...and we don't share them with the non-blondes.

    By the way, what's black, blue, red & brown and is found in a ditch?
    A brunette who told one too many blonde jokes!;)
     
  10. woolleyworm

    woolleyworm Well-Known Member

    Feb 23, 2009
    SW Fort Worth


    You two are cracking me up !! :D:D:D Thanks for the laughs, needed them after this week!
     
  11. Kieran McCaig

    Kieran McCaig New Member

    Jul 8, 2009
    canada
    What do you call a Blonde with a dye job
     
  12. JetGirl

    JetGirl Member

    206
    Dec 18, 2008
    Indiana
    Artificial intelligence. :rolleyes:

    Your joke repertoire ...Old and busted. Needs new hawtness...:D
     
  13. Kieran McCaig

    Kieran McCaig New Member

    Jul 8, 2009
    canada
    Was just testing the waters
     
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