My poem and gift didn't go over well yesterday

Discussion in 'The Pump House Saloon' started by savage170, Feb 15, 2012.

  1. savage170

    savage170 Member

    Joined:
    May 3, 2011
    Messages:
    438
    Location:
    FL
    Posted - 08/31/2011 : 01:48:10 AM
    --------------------------------------------------------------------------------

    Collards is green, my dog's name is Blue
    and I'm so lucky to have a sweet thang like you.

    Yore hair is like cornsilk a-flapping in the breeze.
    Softer than Blue's and without all them fleas.

    You move like the bass, which excite me in May.
    You ain't got no scales but I luv you anyway.

    Yo're as good as okry jist a-fry'n in the pan.
    Yo're as fragrant as "snuff" right out of the can.

    You have some'a yore teeth, for which I am proud;
    I hold my head high when we're in a crowd.

    Cut from the best cloth like a plaid flannel shirt,
    you spark up my life more than a fresh load of dirt.

    When you hold me real tight like a padded gunrack,
    my life is complete; Ain't nuttin' I lack.

    Yore complexion, it's perfection, like the best vinyl sidin'.
    Despite all the years, yore age, it keeps hidin'.

    And when you get old like a '55 Chevy,
    I won't put you on blocks and let grass grow up heavy.

    Me 'n' you's like a Moon Pie with a RC cola drank,
    we go together like a skunk goes with stank.

    Some men, they buy chocolate for Valentine's Day;
    They git it at Wal-Mart, it's romantic that way.

    Some men git roses on that special day
    from the cooler at Kroger."That's impressive," I say.

    Some men buy fine diamonds from a flea market booth.
    "Diamonds are forever," they explain, suave and couth.

    But for this man, honey, these won't do.
    Cause yor'e too special, you sweet thang you.

    I got you a gift, without taste nor odor, more useful than diamonds......
    IT'S A NEW TROLL'N MOTOR!!
  2. BlackEagle

    BlackEagle Well-Known Member Supporting Member

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    4,872
    Location:
    UK
    What's not to like with a trolling motor? :D
  3. jstgsn

    jstgsn Well-Known Member

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    Location:
    Milford, Delaware
    He uses his tongue better than a Kansas City whore......:eek:
  4. rcairflr

    rcairflr Well-Known Member

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    Messages:
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    Location:
    Wichita, Ks
    Thats a beautiful poem. I find it hard to believe it didn't go over well.
  5. 76Highboy

    76Highboy Well-Known Member Supporting Member

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    8,704
    Sounded good to me.
  6. NCHuntsman

    NCHuntsman New Member

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    Location:
    Coastal NC
  7. HunterAlpha1

    HunterAlpha1 Former Guest

    Joined:
    Aug 8, 2011
    Messages:
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    Location:
    Yorktown, VA
    micheal jackson's valentine poem:

    roses are red,
    violets are blue,
    i have a knife, get in the van.
  8. JohnHenry

    JohnHenry Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Apr 30, 2011
    Messages:
    1,695
    Location:
    Livingston county, Michigan
    ..... and did you hear about the guy complaining that his wife wasn't getting a present
    this year 'cuz she didn't use the present he gave her last year .....
  9. savage170

    savage170 Member

    Joined:
    May 3, 2011
    Messages:
    438
    Location:
    FL
    Gave the mother in law a grave plot and she didn't use it
  10. jim summers

    jim summers Active Member

    Joined:
    Jul 13, 2008
    Messages:
    1,200
    Location:
    I reside in southern Indiana, you can almost step
    savage170
    I can't imagine any woman not wanting you for a husband.
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