My poem and gift didn't go over well yesterday

Discussion in 'The Pump House Saloon' started by savage170, Feb 15, 2012.

  1. savage170

    savage170 Member

    May 3, 2011
    Posted - 08/31/2011 : 01:48:10 AM

    Collards is green, my dog's name is Blue
    and I'm so lucky to have a sweet thang like you.

    Yore hair is like cornsilk a-flapping in the breeze.
    Softer than Blue's and without all them fleas.

    You move like the bass, which excite me in May.
    You ain't got no scales but I luv you anyway.

    Yo're as good as okry jist a-fry'n in the pan.
    Yo're as fragrant as "snuff" right out of the can.

    You have some'a yore teeth, for which I am proud;
    I hold my head high when we're in a crowd.

    Cut from the best cloth like a plaid flannel shirt,
    you spark up my life more than a fresh load of dirt.

    When you hold me real tight like a padded gunrack,
    my life is complete; Ain't nuttin' I lack.

    Yore complexion, it's perfection, like the best vinyl sidin'.
    Despite all the years, yore age, it keeps hidin'.

    And when you get old like a '55 Chevy,
    I won't put you on blocks and let grass grow up heavy.

    Me 'n' you's like a Moon Pie with a RC cola drank,
    we go together like a skunk goes with stank.

    Some men, they buy chocolate for Valentine's Day;
    They git it at Wal-Mart, it's romantic that way.

    Some men git roses on that special day
    from the cooler at Kroger."That's impressive," I say.

    Some men buy fine diamonds from a flea market booth.
    "Diamonds are forever," they explain, suave and couth.

    But for this man, honey, these won't do.
    Cause yor'e too special, you sweet thang you.

    I got you a gift, without taste nor odor, more useful than diamonds......
  2. BlackEagle

    BlackEagle Well-Known Member Supporting Member

    Nov 25, 2011
    What's not to like with a trolling motor? :D

  3. jstgsn

    jstgsn Well-Known Member

    Nov 1, 2009
    Milford, Delaware
    He uses his tongue better than a Kansas City whore......:eek:
  4. rcairflr

    rcairflr Well-Known Member

    Jul 2, 2011
    Wichita, Ks
    Thats a beautiful poem. I find it hard to believe it didn't go over well.
  5. 76Highboy

    76Highboy Well-Known Member

    Jan 1, 2012
    Sounded good to me.
  6. NCHuntsman

    NCHuntsman New Member

    Jan 9, 2012
    Coastal NC
  7. HunterAlpha1

    HunterAlpha1 Former Guest

    Aug 8, 2011
    Yorktown, VA
    micheal jackson's valentine poem:

    roses are red,
    violets are blue,
    i have a knife, get in the van.
  8. JohnHenry

    JohnHenry Well-Known Member

    ..... and did you hear about the guy complaining that his wife wasn't getting a present
    this year 'cuz she didn't use the present he gave her last year .....
  9. savage170

    savage170 Member

    May 3, 2011
    Gave the mother in law a grave plot and she didn't use it
  10. savage170
    I can't imagine any woman not wanting you for a husband.
Similar Threads
Forum Title Date
The Pump House Saloon A Poem for the ladies May 7, 2014
The Pump House Saloon End of the World – My Mayan Prophecy Poem Dec 20, 2012
The Pump House Saloon CHRISTmas poem Nov 14, 2011
The Pump House Saloon outhouse poem Jul 7, 2010
The Pump House Saloon Two moving war poems May 2, 2009