Teacher Arrested In NYC

Discussion in 'The Pump House Saloon' started by Gabob, Jan 8, 2010.

  1. Gabob

    Gabob Well-Known Member

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    A public school teacher was arrested today at John F. Kennedy International Airport as he attempted to board a flight while in possession of a ruler, a protractor, a compass, a slide-rule and a calculator.. At a morning press conference, the Attorney General said he believes the man is a member of the notorious Al-Gebra movement. He did not identify the man, who has been charged by the FBI with carrying weapons of math instruction.

    'Al-Gebra is a problem for us', the Attorney General said. 'They derive solutions by means and extremes, and sometimes go off on tangents in search of absolute values.' They use secret code names like 'X' and 'Y' and refer to themselves as 'unknowns', but we have determined that they belong to a common denominator of the axis of medieval with coordinates in every country.

    As the Greek philanderer Isosceles used to say, 'There are 3 sides to every triangle'. When asked to comment on the arrest, President Obama said, 'If God had wanted us to have better weapons of math instruction, he would have given us more fingers and toes.' White House aides told reporters they could not recall a more intelligent or profound statement by the President; It is believed that another Nobel Prize will follow----
  2. ARB

    ARB New Member

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    That's priceless!:D So, it must have been a moral dilema that caused me to dismiss Al-Gebra as something foreign and evil.
  3. Helix_FR

    Helix_FR Active Member

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    Very nice, well written. Had me going until the Alg-Gebra movement. Only movement I ever got from algebra was.....never mind. :rolleyes:
  4. Eddie N

    Eddie N New Member

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    Had me goin' there, for a sec. But, knowing who we're dealing with, who knows?
  5. Carne Frio

    Carne Frio Member

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    Don't leave out those irrational numbers and
    attempts to divide by zero !
  6. jjmitchell60

    jjmitchell60 Active Member

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    You need to post that on some other forums as well Bob. Good one.
  7. mncarpenter

    mncarpenter New Member

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    I was politely asked to leave Al-Gebra forever when I was a freshman in H.S. I was caught snickering at the fat hanging over the teachers hosiery when she bent over..that image is burned into my brain like it happened yesterday. I have kept a close watch for members of Al-Gebra ever since and have never hesitated to turn a suspected member over to the authorities.
  8. Jay

    Jay New Member

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    Outstanding.... and I'm gonna swipe it....
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