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The kind of immigrants we need

Discussion in 'The Pump House Saloon' started by Bruce FLinch, Apr 1, 2006.

  1. Bruce FLinch

    Bruce FLinch New Member

    Joined:
    Aug 27, 2005
    Messages:
    5,015
    Location:
    Bay Point, Kali..aka Gun Point
    Pedro Montoya came to the USA in March 2006.
    His parents were very concerned about his entry into
    public school in Texas and tutored him extensively in
    English, Math, Science, and the History of the United States
    before immigrating. Pedro did very well on written tests, so
    the teacher thought she would give the other kids a chance
    to catch up by giving an oral pop-quiz.
    The results were not exactly what she expected.



    "Who said: Give me Liberty, or give me Death?"

    The teacher saw a sea of blank faces, except for Pedro, who had his hand up.

    "Patrick Henry, 1775."

    "Very good!" said the teacher. "Now, who said, "Government of the
    people, by the people, for the people, shall not perish from the earth?"

    Again, no response except from Pedro: "Abraham Lincoln, 1863."

    The teacher snapped at the class, "Class, you should be ashamed!
    Pedro, who is new to our country, knows more about its history than you do!"

    She heard a loud whisper: "Screw the Mexicans!"

    "Who said that?" she demanded.

    Pedro put his hand up. "Jim Bowie, 1836."

    At that point, a student in the back said, "I'm gonna puke."

    The teacher glared and asked, "All right! Now, who said that?"

    Again, Pedro answered, "George Bush to the Japanese Prime Minister, 1991."

    Now furious, another student yelled, "Oh yeah? Suck this!"

    Pedro jumped out of his chair waving his hand and shouting to the
    teacher, "Bill Clinton to Monica Lewinsky, 1997!"

    Now, with almost mob hysteria, the teacher said, "You little shit. If
    you say anything else, I'll kill you!"

    Pedro frantically yelled at the top of his voice, "Gary Condit to
    Chandra Levy, 2001."

    The teacher fainted, and as the class gathered around her on the floor,
    someone said, "Oh sh!t, we're in BIG trouble now!"

    Pedro whispered, "Saddam Hussein, 2003."

    Finally someone throws an eraser at Pedro, someone shouted "Duck"!

    Teacher, just waking, asked "Who said that?"

    Pedro: Dick Cheney 2006!
  2. wolfgang2000

    wolfgang2000 New Member

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    Dec 10, 2005
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    Location:
    Mountain Grove MO.
  3. Marlin

    Marlin *TFF Admin Staff Chief Counselor*

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    At SouthernMoss' side forever!
    :D

    Attached Files:

  4. Deputy Dawg

    Deputy Dawg Active Member

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    Central Texas Gulf Coast
  5. inplanotx

    inplanotx New Member

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  6. Crpdeth

    Crpdeth Active Member

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    ROTF! :D

    Thats a good one Bruce!

    Crpdeth
  7. southernshooter

    southernshooter New Member

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    Deep South Mississippi
  8. Gunfyter

    Gunfyter New Member

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    Western Maryland
    Most Excellent :D :D :D :D :D
  9. henry0reilly

    henry0reilly Member

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    Indiana
    The classic jokes always get recycled.
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