An actual letter

Discussion in 'The Pump House Saloon' started by Shooter45, Jul 21, 2009.

  1. Shooter45

    Shooter45 *Administrator* Staff Member Supporting Member

    Feb 9, 2001
    Here at TFF
    If this doesn't make you laugh, nothing will. :D

    Dear Sir, I'm in the process of renewing my passport, and still cannot believe this. How is it that Radio Shack has my address and telephone number and knows that I bought a TV cable from them back in 1997, and yet, the Federal Government is still asking me where I was born and on what date.

    For Christ sakes, do you guys do this by hand? You have my birth date on my social security card, on all the income tax forms I've filed for the past 30 years. It is on my health insurance card, my driver's license, on the last eight *^&%* passports I've had, on all those stupid customs declaration forms I've had to fill out before being allowed off the planes over the last 30 years, and all those insufferable census forms that are done at election times.

    Would somebody please take note, once and for all, that my mother's name is Maryanne, my father's name is Robert and I'd be absolutely astounded if that ever changed between now and when I die!!!!!!
    I apologize, I'm really &*^((% off this morning. Between you and me, I've had enough of this BS! You send the application to my house, then you ask me for my address. What is going on? You have a gang of Neanderthal ^&%$^##@ working there??? Look at my $%&^ picture. Do I look like Bin Laden? I don't want to dig up Yasser Arafat, I just want to go and park my $%* on a sandy beach.

    And would someone please tell me, why would you give a %&^& whether I plan on visiting a farm in the next 15 days? If I ever got the urge to do something weird to a chicken or a goat, believe you me, I'd sure as hell not want to tell anyone!

    Well, I have to go now, 'cause I have to go to the other end of the city and get another copy of my birth certificate, to the tune of $60. Would it be so complicated to have all the services in the same spot to assist in the issuance of a new passport the same day?? Nooooo, that'd be too ^$&% easy and maybe makes sense. You'd rather have us running all over the place like chickens with our heads cut off, then find some &^*&*^^& to confirm that it's really me on the %^&$%*^( picture - you know, the one where we're not allowed to smile?!

    Hey, you know why we can't smile? We're totally %#&^*$ off! Signed - An Irate Citizen.

    P.S. Remember what I said above about the picture and getting someone to confirm that it's me? Well, my family has been in this country since 1776 . I have served in the military for something over 30 years and have had security clearances up the yingyang.
    I have to get someone 'important' to verify who I am - you know, Someone like my doctor - WHO WAS BORN AND RAISED IN COMMUNIST CHINA !!
  2. retired grunt

    retired grunt New Member

    Mar 30, 2009
    Northern NY
    I Love it! Hope it is a real letter, sometime the 'crats need a wake up call

  3. Charlie the sniper

    Charlie the sniper New Member

    Dec 14, 2008
    England, thats the USN aircraft carrier near europ
    It's the same over here in the UK......THIS MADE ME LAUGH.
  4. FTK87

    FTK87 New Member

    Mar 1, 2009
    Chouteau, Oklahoma
    that is an instant classic! :)
  5. kutaho

    kutaho New Member

    Apr 15, 2009
    Peoples Republic of the Pacific Northwest
    Thats about the gist of it...
  6. PharmrJohn

    PharmrJohn New Member

    Jun 15, 2009
    Western Washington
  7. colt

    colt New Member

    Jan 19, 2009
    SOOOOO true.
  8. Trouble 45-70

    Trouble 45-70 New Member

    Apr 10, 2009
    NE Ar. W. of Black River
    Obama dosn't have to do any of this.
  9. artabr

    artabr New Member

    Mar 3, 2008
    New Iberia, Louisiana
    Why should he, he's just the president. :rolleyes: :mad:

    We need smilies with blood shooting from their eyes and smoke coming from their ears. ;) :D

    Great letter Shooter. ;) :D

Similar Threads
Forum Title Date
The Pump House Saloon Actual Letter From School Jan 4, 2008
The Pump House Saloon ACTUAL AD ON PERSONAL SITE Jul 25, 2013
The Pump House Saloon Actual stupid questions asked by lawyers Jan 1, 2013
The Pump House Saloon actually a real question Oct 9, 2011
The Pump House Saloon Some actual exchanges between pilots and control towers. Apr 17, 2011