The misses.

Discussion in 'The Pump House Saloon' started by deingy, Aug 27, 2017.

  1. deingy

    deingy Active Member

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    A man and his wife are out driving, and get pulled over by a police officer.

    The husband, who is the one behind the wheel, asks, “What’s the problem, officer?”

    Officer: “You were going at least 75 in a 55 zone.”

    Man: “No sir, I was going 65.”

    Wife: “Oh, Harry. You were going 80.” (The man gives his wife a dirty look.)

    Officer: “I’m also going to give you a ticket for your broken tail light.

    Man: “Broken tail light? I didn’t know about a broken tail light!”

    Wife: “Oh Harry, you’ve known about that tail light for weeks.” (The man gives his wife another dirty look.)

    Officer: “I’m also going to give you a citation for not wearing your seat belt.”

    Man: “Oh, this? I just took it off when you were walking up to the car.”

    Wife: “Oh Harry, you never wear your seat belt.”

    The man turns to his wife and yells, “Shut your mouth!”

    The officer turns to the woman and asks, “Ma’am, does your husband talk to you this way all the time?”

    Wife: “No, only when he’s drunk.”
     
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  2. carver

    carver Moderator Supporting Member

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    And the looser is ..................................
     
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  3. TigerLeo

    TigerLeo Well-Known Member

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    Reasons to not drive with your wife in the car.....
     
  4. Archie

    Archie Active Member

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    I knew there was a reason I'm not looking for another woman!
     
  5. Firedog

    Firedog New Member

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    The minister who married me told this joke at my reception over the DJ's mic, he had to get a ride home also.
     
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  6. dbcooper

    dbcooper Well-Known Member

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  7. 68c15

    68c15 Well-Known Member Supporting Member

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    You got married to a minster?
     
  8. Firedog

    Firedog New Member

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    I might live in VT but dont swing that way:D:D:D

    the Minister who married me

    not married to me
     
  9. TigerLeo

    TigerLeo Well-Known Member

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    Not all ministers are men, are they?